


The Red Keep

by LadyBee



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin
Genre: F/M, Gothic Au, Gothic Settings, Guardian-Ward Relationship, Most Starks Are Dead
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-26
Updated: 2018-06-23
Packaged: 2018-07-26 19:04:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 48,601
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7586284
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyBee/pseuds/LadyBee
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Once she had been Lady Arya Stark, the daughter of an important lord and a member of the Stark family. She would still have right to be called lady and some money to her name, but everything she once had and was had died along with her family. Her future and wellbeing rested in the hands of a cousin she had never seen in her entire life. A man called Jon Targaryen, who had inherited her father’s title and Winterfell along with the responsibility of being her legal guardian. She had little time to gather her things and take a train to her new life. According to Mr. Tarly she was expected at the Red Keep and her mysterious cousin was anxious to meet her.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [meli_fan](https://archiveofourown.org/users/meli_fan/gifts).



She had put the locker aside once Samwel Tarly announced that they were near the Red Keep. Arya couldn’t help sighting. Suddenly things became quite real and final somehow. The accident, the coffins, Mr. Tarly announcing that she was no longer allowed to stay at Winterfell alone and that she had a guardian named by her father’s will.

Once she had been Lady Arya Stark, the daughter of an important lord and a member of the Stark family. She would still have right to be called lady and some money to her name, but everything she once had and was had died along with her family. Her future and wellbeing rested in the hands of a cousin she had never seen in her entire life. A man called Jon Targaryen, who had inherited her father’s title and Winterfell along with the responsibility of being her legal guardian. She had little time to gather her things and take a train to her new life. According to Mr. Tarly she was expected at the Red Keep and her mysterious cousin was anxious to meet her.

Somehow she doubted. No one would ever crave for the responsibility of taking care of an orphan, let alone one that had little grace and talent to be a proper good lady. Her money might buy her some sympathy from her new guardian, but there was always a risk of her being robbed by this man, if Sansa’s gothic novels had thought her anything.

Arya looked at Tarly and tried to imagine what was in store for her once she got to the Red Keep. Samwel was a funny chubby man, with a taste for books and the courage of a mouse. He claimed to be Jon’s solicitor and close friend, which made her wonder what kind of friends a man like Tarly had.

He seemed to be honest enough and Arya tried to hold to this feeble hope. Maybe this cousin of hers was a decent man with a good heart. Maybe he would help her to find a position, maybe as a governess once she was of age and could handle her own money.

“We are almost there.” Samwel said again, trying to sound as cheerful as possible. “It is a superb place. You’ll see it with your own eyes, my lady. Jon will be pleased to have you there. He was most concerned about you staying on your own after the tragedy. Solitude is not a good counselor in such times.”

“I hope I’m not a disappointment to my cousin.” Arya replied. “I lack the talent for being taken care of, Mr. Tarly. I’m not a lady either. My sister is.”

“Nonsense. Master Jon will be delighted. He is a quiet fellow, but he does have a kind heart behind the sour face. He will like to have some company.”

“Isn’t he married?” She asked plainly.

“Oh no. Not Jon. He would have become a priest if he wasn’t his father’s sole heir. He never seemed much interested in female companion. I mean…He hasn’t found a suitable life companion yet.”

“He must be a jolly thing.” She couldn’t help the sarcasm. Tarly laughed at it.

“He has his particular brand of humor, I would say. He will like to show you the horses and hounds. Master Jon appreciates the sport as much as my lady does, if your sister is to be believed.”

“I doubt that I’ll find much joy in such things now. I appreciate the concern, though.” Arya said melancholically.

“I know things seem to be dark now, my lady. You have every right to feel your lost, but have faith. The Red Keep is hardly the worst place in the world and Jon will do everything in his power to make you feel at home.” Tarly said it with genuine concern. “Look! There’s the Keep!”

Arya gave in to curiosity and looked out at the carriage’s window to see the mighty and frightening figure of the red towers rising in the horizon. She had thought the Red Keep to be more like Winterfell, not a real castle made of red colored stone.

The place could have come out of a horror story, or something just as creative. She had read those penny dreadfuls that Bran used to love. They were full of places like the Red Keep. Old castles haunted by dark forces and spirits.

Maybe her cousin was a bored vampire waiting for his chubby friend to bring him some fresh blood. Her mother would call her silly for thinking such improper things, but it would have amused Bran and Rickon.

“I never imagined it to be a real castle.” She confessed.

“It was meant for military purposes, but became a residence along the centuries. It is said the William, The Conqueror ordered the construction. The Targaryens claim to be blood related to him.”

“My family claims to be descendents of the old kings of Britain, who ruled before the northerners’ invasions, before the idea of unification.” She said. “Father used to tell me the stories.”

“I’m sure you’ll learn some new ones here.” Sam answered with a kind smile.

The carriage stopped at the front door and once Arya had a chance to look closer to the castle, she couldn’t help the chill in her spine. Although the place looked like something out of a fairy tale, there was something sinister about the dragon forms sculpted in red stone, like gargoyles.

There was something about the castle. An aura of violence she couldn’t quite explain. Perhaps it was just her overactive mind imagining things, but it made her wonder what kind of man was her cousin and especially his father, Lord Rhaegar.

There were several servants waiting to greet her at the entrance in a way that made her remember of Winterfell and how her mother used to run the house. They were all polite to her, but her cousin was no were to be seen.

She was conducted inside by a maid named Jeyne and Arya held her breath at the sight of the great hall.

Although Winterfell were a magnificent place, the Starks have had little interest in refinement. The decoration had been inherited over generations and kept a medieval aura, with all the tapestries and wooden furniture. Sansa had always labeled Winterfell as old fashioned, while Arya new little about it, it was plain enough that the Red Keep was something else entirely.

The place was a bit gloomy, but the decoration inside was nothing but lavishing and dramatic. She thought about the Neuschwanstein Castle, built by Ludwig II. The place was something so fantastic that it might have come from a fantasy book or even the dreams of a mad man. It felt a bit oppressive and unfamiliar.

The maid guided her in silence upstairs and through the halls. Her room was located at the top of the highest tower. It felt a bit lonely, even though the place was carefully decorated and obviously comfortable.

“Master Jon expects you to join him at dinner, my lady.” The maid said to her.

“I’ll be there. Thank you for everything, Jeyne.” Arya answered with evident exhaustion.

The maid bowed lightly and went away, leaving Arya alone with her own fears and impressions about what was to be her new home.

There was something about her room that showed how much care was involved in the preparation of the place to receive her, as if they were really trying to make the transition as gentle as possible. It still felt lonely, though. She was used to a crowded house and the sounds of numerous voices, while that room and that castle were absurdly quiet.

She looked at the table near the window. There was a vase full of roses of the most unusual color. All of them were pale blue and they looked as sad as she was. They were beautiful, though. Whoever had picked them to adorn her room had tried to be kind to her even if nothing were able to make her forget of her sadness.

Arya soon concluded that the roses were the things she liked the most about that room decorated in black and red. Those roses seemed to be as out of place as she was, and maybe just as lonely.

She laid on her new bed for a while and probably felt asleep. She felt so tired all the time since the funeral that it made her wonder how she could lose sleep so easily during the nights that succeeded the accident.

When she woke up, Jeyne was already there to help her to get dressed for dinner. She would rather stay in her room for the night and deal with her mysterious cousin later, but Arya knew that she had little choice in the matter.

The maid picked up one of her black dresses. None of them were particularly fancy or expensive, but it would make a good figure at the table. Jeyne combed her hair in a sophisticated bun that made Arya remember of her mother. She looked at her image reflected in the mirror and sighted. She wondered if she would ever feel like her old self again.

Arya went down the stairs while observing more closely the paintings and luxurious tapestries hanged on the walls. Most of them seemed to tell a story about someone with silver blond hair and dragons. Gallant knights crowing princesses after a tournament, warriors fighting in the desert, two women and a men flying on dragon’s back.

“I’ve always thought them to be extremely exaggerated.” Someone said behind her, startling Arya Star.

She looked back to face a young man with a long and sober face. His hair was longer than what would be considered fashionable according to her sister’s perception, and he wore a fuzzy beard that made him look a bit wild. If she had known that man in another place, she would have created stories about pirates or bold explorers, but inside that castle he looked more like Mr. Rochester.

He looked much like her father, she realized. Her eyes were almost of the same color and it made her sad for a moment. Among dragons and dark halls made of red stone, he looked much like some sort of Slavic lord, a ruthless vampire, although his eyes were kind. He tried to smile at her as if he wasn’t sure if it was the proper thing to do and Arya concluded that he lacked the refinement to be a supernatural creature.

“I’m sorry. It wasn’t my intention to startle you.” He said in a polite way.

“You must be my cousin.” She concluded. He nodded slightly.

“Guilty.” He said without much refinement. “I’m sorry for not welcoming you personally this afternoon. I had business to attend elsewhere.” He said while he came down the stairs to reach her level. “I trust you have everything you need, my lady.”

“Yes, thank you. I’m fine and  Jeyne was very helpful.” She said in a way that would make her mother relived. “And…Just call me Arya, if you like. I’m not a lady.”

When he reached the same step as she, Arya could notice how tall and young he really was. Of course Tarly had told her that her cousin was near in his middle twenties, but the first impression had made her believe him to be older. She noticed that he had a long and thin scar over his left eye that made him look fearsome.

“You are a lady, but if you don’t feel comfortable with me addressing you by your rightful title, I’ll gladly call you Arya.” He answered kindly. “And you can call me Jon, if you like.”

“It seems nice to me.”

He offered her his arm to help her down the stairs in a courteous way. They walked in silence until they reached the dining room, while Arya tried to figure what sort of man he was.

Her cousin was well educated and polite, even though he looked nothing like any nobleman she had ever known. He carried a sort of simplicity in his manners, a carefree way of acting. The manners of a man used to have no one near to pay enough attention to his actions.

Jon offered her the sit by his left side. It felt a bit strange to share a meal with a man she barely knew sitting so close to her, when there was several sits available. He was probably trying to be amiable and display his concerns, although her mother would have found the proximity a bit disturbing.

“I have the feeling that I have done nothing as I should have.” He finally spoke in a concerned tone.

“What do you mean?” She asked while a footman poured them some wine.

“I should have gone to the funeral and present myself properly before taking you to a place that is meant to be your new home. Now that I had the chance to consider it, my actions have been quite misplaced and reckless.” He answered in a sober tone. “I’m really sorry for your lost and the circumstances in which we were presented to each other. I wish we could have met under different circumstances.”

“When I was told that I would be put under your guardianship I thought you would take residence at Winterfell.” She said before taking a sip of the wine.

“It was my intention. I was determinate to go, but I was detained here.” He answered in a very calculated tone. “My father insisted that I should stay here.”

“I thought Lord Rhaegar would have dinner with us.” Arya added suspiciously. That seemed to make Jon uncomfortable.

“You won’t see much of my father, I’m afraid.” He answered calmly. “He is a bit of a reclusive whenever he is at home. He travels frequently and often spend months abroad.”

“Don’t you have siblings?” She asked given to the annoying silence in the castle. Jon nodded negatively.

“I had a brother and a sister. Both of them older than me, but they died before I was born.” Jon replied. He looked at her carefully before dinner started to be served. That made her feel uncomfortable. “I understand that you lived in a crowded house. It must be…Strange.”

“I’m not much used to silence.” She answered before tasting the food. “I could have stayed with my sister. She is about to have her first child.”

“I didn’t write the testament.” He answered without much enthusiasm. “I didn’t even expect to inherit anything, but I was given a title, a state and all the responsibilities that follow. I understand that this arrangement is far from being the ideal, but it didn’t seem right to ignore your existence when your wellbeing is my responsibility.”

“You didn’t have to drag me here.” She replied sharply. “You could pretend that I didn’t exist, since I’ve never knew of your existence in the first place.”

He remained in silence for a while, as if ignoring her rough attitude. If her words had hurt him, Arya couldn’t tell. Jon chose to focus his attentions on the plate before him, and the wine cup. She felt exhausted and broken. Everything she wanted was a familiar place to rest and the comfort of her old room.

“It didn’t seem right.” He finally answered. “To leave you alone while you are still grieving, I mean. Of course I could have sent you to your sister, but I didn’t want you to feel unwanted or unwelcome here.”

“Too much consideration to someone you’ve never knew.” She replied bitterly.

“I had other reasons to insist on it.” He looked at her carefully.

“What reasons?”

“I wished to know a bit of my mother’s family.” He answered as a matter of fact. “And a bit of noise is a nice change around here.” There was something in his tone that made her back off. Arya couldn’t tell if it was melancholy or hope.

She couldn’t help to look around and notice that not even the servants remained in the room while they were eating. There was no sound other than the sound of the wind blowing through the windows and shutters. It made her think about the pale blue roses in her room and how lonely they looked. Arya lowered her face a bit, feeling utterly ashamed for not realizing that he was just trying to do the best he could to help her when they have never met before.

“I’m…I’m sorry. I didn’t want to sound ungrateful.” She said with genuine repentance.

He looked at her briefly while trying to conceal a pale smile.

“You are grieving and I took you out of your house to a place and a life that you are not familiar with.” He answered calmly. “I have nothing to forgive. If anyone here is at fault, that would be me. I hope one day you may find it in your heart to forgive me, but for now I just want us to live as happily as possible.”

“Is it possible?” She asked absently. “To be happy after what happened?”

He looked at her with sympathy, if not with deep understanding. She was brought to a life of silence. A life that he seemed to be quite familiar with.

“I believe it is. It will require time and patience. You will cry as much as you need and there will be days you won’t want to get up in the morning. With time it becomes easier until you find yourself smiling again.” He answered as if he was confessing his own experience.

“It was like this for you?” She asked boldly, making him muffle a laugh, which felt insulting.

“Kind of. I was never considered someone particularly jolly, though. If you talk with anyone from the staff they will say that I was born with a sour face. Willa will say that I was born mourning over my mother’s death.”

“It’s a terrible thing to say to anyone, especially to a child.” Arya pointed after putting her plate aside.

“Well I haven’t given anyone much reason to think differently. I wish I had an easy smile and talent to make friends with everyone, but father says I inherit it from my mother’s side.” Jon pointed out. “Were your brother’s like it? I mean…Solemn.”

“Not really.” Arya said while sipping her wine. “Father was. My siblings inherited my mother’s temperament. They were easy to smile, all of them with auburn hair and blue eyes. I’m the only one with my father’s looks and sour face. Father once told me I reminded him of aunt Lyanna.”

“You look like her.” Her cousin pointed with a brief and shy smile. “Not that I’ve ever met her, but there’s a portrait of her at the gallery. I can show it to you if you like.”

“You look like my father, only younger and fussier with all this hair.” She waved her hand in front of her face, making him laugh.

“I don’t really care much about my looks. The staff is used to my ugly face, but I guess I should have made an effort to look more presentable. Am I scarring you?” For one who claimed to be unfriendly and sour, her cousin was making an exceptional effort to be nice to her.

“Not as much as I thought you would.” She replied. “May I know what do you have in mind for my future? What should I expect under your guardianship?”

“You’ll have your own income. I have no interest to control your finances. This is your home now and you are the lady of the house, so I expect you to do what you must to think of this place as so. There’s one thing, though.” Jon said with a grave tone. “The west wing is forbidden. The place is old and the structure was neglected for centuries. It’s not safe for you there and I would rather avoid accidents.”

“Such a warning makes me feel like one of those helpless women on novels.” Arya answered mindlessly. “Are you a villain, cousin?”

“I hope not, sweet cousin.” He smiled at her shyly. “I wish for nothing but your friendship. This place is far less extraordinary than its looks suggest, but it is an old place after all and the structure is no longer as reliable as it should be. There’s nothing of interest in the west wing. Unwanted furniture, spider webs and dust is wall what you’ll find there. I used to think of it as a place where monsters hided and ghosts walked, but once I was old enough to visit the only thing I found there was half an hour of unstoppable sneezing.”

Arya couldn’t help laughing at the idea of her all so sober and mysterious cousin sneezing over dust. The image of it made him far less frightening and intimidating that she thought him to be at first.

“Now that’s something nice to hear.” He smiled at her fondly. Despite of his looks, there was something in the way he looked at her. Some sort of kindness that Arya couldn’t ignore. A bit of warmth that made her feel welcome. “I hope to listen to your laugh more often in the future.”


	2. Chapter 2

That night had been silent and frightening in many ways. The wind howling through the naked branches of the trees in the woods and the foreign bed she laid made it almost impossible for Arya to sleep. She looked at the vase with pale blue roses for a while, wondering where those flower grew, until she gave up trying to sleep and raised from her bed to look outside the window.

From her tower she could see a vast extension of land and half of the old castle. She looked at the west wing, all dark and abandoned in its looks. What a pity it was to see such a monumental place abandoned like that. It was almost sad and phantasmagoric, like some sort of cursed place.

Arya closed her eyes and yawned, feeling the journey and all the new life she was supposed to adapt weighting on her shoulders. She opened her eyes again Arya saw a small light in the West Tower and a slender shadow passing by the distant window. She rubbed her eyes and looked at that window again, but there was nothing there but darkness.

For a moment she thought herself to be exhausted and probably too influenced by some novel she had read on her way to the Red Keep. The place alone was frightening and very different from everything she was used too.

Another part of her couldn’t stop wondering what sort of ghosts haunted that place. Her aunt had died in that castle during child birth and a family that claimed to descend from William The Conquer surely had plenty of cruel and bloody deaths to show. Could that place be cursed by any chance or what Arya had seen was nothing but an illusion of her fertile and gloomy mind? It was probably just exhaustion, but at least the thoughts of an adventure could keep her mind of coming back to her own tragedy.

Arya decided to call it a night and go back to bed, still annoyed by that vision.

Even her cousin was a strange man, she concluded as she laid on her new bed. He seemed to live an isolated life and even his looks were unusual, making him a threatening man despite of his shy and slightly awkward manners. Jon seemed to be a kind man who wasn’t used to company and Arya decided that she would try to not judge me too harshly based on their first meeting.

Arya had still to discuss with him what would be of her once she came of age. Jon had declared that he had no interest in her money and that she would be able to manage her own money, but Arya needed to know if she would still have a roof above her head in the near future.

She decided to search for a job as governess and put her mind to work. Even with her own income and inheritance, Arya wanted to do something more productive with her life. If Winterfell was no longer a viable option for her, than at least with a job she would be allowed to find her own place in the world and she would be free of her cousin’s mercy.

Slowly her eyes shut and Arya’s conscience faded away. It was a restless sleep, but even so her mind seemed to have given up all the ideas of ghosts. The only thing she wanted was to go away from that castle as soon as possible.

She woke up at the sound of movement inside her room and jumped out of bed with a startle just to find Jeyne moving around like some sort of machine, serving a small table and separating clothes inside Arya’s chest.

“Good morning, my lady.” Jeyne said politely. “I’m sorry to startle you. It wasn’t my intention.”

“What time is it?” Arya asked before yawning.

“Eight o’clock, my lady.” Jeyne said with a brief smile.

“Isn’t it improper for me to have breakfast on my room?” Arya asked curiously. “I thought only married women were allowed such a luxury.”  Jeyne looked at her confused.

“I wouldn’t know, my lady. You are the first lady I serve here and Master Jon told me I should bring you breakfast every morning along with the papers.”  Jeyne answered shortly. “I can arrange for my lady to have breakfast downstairs, if it’s your wish.”

“It’s fine the way it is, Jeyne. Thank you.” Arya said with a brief nod. “Is my cousin already awake?”

“Master Jon left early in the morning to meet some tenants and check the stocks. He shall be back before mid day.”  Jeyne answered gently. “His lordship asked me to show you around the place. The library has books enough to keep anyone entertained for a lifetime and the gardens are pretty even during autumn. There’s the music room too, if my lady prefers to play any of the instruments there.”

“I would rather have some fresh air outside.” Arya said while taking her place at the table. “Tell me, Jeyne. There are stables here? Any horse I can ride?”

“Master Jon keeps a number of horses at the stables. I’m sure you’ll find an animal of good temper there. I’ll send Pip there and he shall talk to Harwin to prepare you a good horse.”

“A regular saddle, please. I just can’t deal with the lady’s saddle.” Arya asked as she poured some tea on her cup. “And I guess a dress won’t be necessary. I’ll pick up my own clothes for the day, if you don’t mind.” Arya made an effort to smile at her. “Since my cousin isn’t around, I guess I can ride without causing him much mortification.” Jeyne laughed lightly at it.

“I don’t see how Master Jon would be mortified.” Jeyne answered kindly.

“I guess he was expecting for a different sort of lady when he received the news about my imminent arrival.” Arya answered simply, looking at Jeyne with a hint of sadness. “I’ll be a disappointment to him, just like I was to everybody else.”

“Master Jon doesn’t really know how it is to have a lady near, so I guess anything my lady does will be considered the epitome of propriety.” Jeyne laughed lightly at it. “Don’t be so harsh on yourself.”

“Is he really that reclusive? My father didn’t like crowds, but even him had to deal with people every now and then for social reasons.” Arya pointed calmly.

“The family is very discreet. It has been a long time since the Master had visitors to entertain. I’m afraid you won’t find much noise around here, my lady. Unless you are able to change the Master’s mind.” Jeyne smiled kindly at her. “Do you need anything else, my lady?”

“No, Jeyne. Thank you.” Arya answered politely and allowed Jeyne to take her leave.

Arya finished her breakfast before she could search her luggage for clothes that her mother would have labeled as improper. It was nothing but one of Bran’s former trousers that Arya had adjusted to fit her and an old shirt. She got dressed and looked at her image in the mirror. She looked like a stable boy in those cloths, but at least she could ride freely.

She left her room and went downstairs to find Jeyne again, so the maid could lead her to the stables. Although Jeyne had insisted that nothing Arya could do would actually shock anyone around the house, it was plain enough that her cloths had caused a certain commotion among the staff as she walked toward the stables.

Mr. Tarly and Jeyne weren’t lying when they said that the Red Keep had a number of fine horses. She walked by the stalls examining the animals carefully. The smell of the place was familiar and welcome. Arya closed her eyes for a second and her mind went straight back to the stables at Winterfell.

“They grey mare is a good one.” A grumpy voice said behind her. “Sure foot and fast, if the lady knows her way on horseback.”

Arya turned her face to see a stocky man with a clean shaved face tending to one of the horses behind her.

“I’m Harwin.” He said as he brushed a great stallion of feisty temper. “I take care of the horses around here. The Master said the lady liked horses. I even got a lady’s saddle for you, but by the looks of your clothes a regular one will do just fine. Jeyne didn’t have to bother send me the boy to tell me this much.”

“A regular will be perfect.” Arya answered right away.

“Even if you were dressed like a proper lady I would think so. You look like your late aunt, my lady.” Harwin said while approaching the grey mare he had suggested her to prepare her saddle. “Lady Lyanna knew her way around the stables. She was more of a centaur than a woman.”

“My father used to say so. You knew her then?” Arya asked suddenly curious.

“I was very young when she died, but my old father used to take care of her horse shortly after her arrival here.” He said. “She was a fine woman, but not much of a lady like those the old lord had here before. She never wore boy’s clothes, though.”

“Let’s consider it an improvement then.” Arya answered without a second thought, making him laugh.

“Aye.” Harwin said while saddling the mare. “I guess the young Master will be more at ease with you being like this. He knows nothing of proper ladies.”

“So I’ve heard, but I’m not here to impress my cousin. We are nothing to each other but an imposed obligation that neither of us would take, if that was an option.” Arya sighted. “He seems to be a decent man, but I do not intend to stay here forever.”

“Training to run away, are you?” Harwin teased her as he handled Arya the reigns. “The Master will be heartbroken. He was quite excited about your arrival. As much as his sour face is able to show, but you women do like hurting a poor fellow’s heart.”

Arya ignored his statement while she mounted the grey mare. She felt the animal breathing and moving under her as she tried to adjust on the saddle. Be on horseback again was somehow a relief.

“It’s nothing personal. I just don’t think it is right to rely on someone’s mercy indefinitely.” Arya answered with a confident smile as the mare started to walk. “I do care about my cousin, but what is the point on pretending that this arrangement is something that we want. This is at most a provisory situation.”

“Don’t go too far, my lady. The woods are dangerous and you don’t know the land.” Harwin warned her, dutifully ignoring what she said about his master, as Arya rode out of the stables.

“I won’t.” She shouted back.

She conducted the mare on a steady and gentle pace just to test the animal. It would take her a while to get used to the horse, but Arya couldn’t help the gentle warmth in her heart that grew at the feeling of doing something familiar. There was nothing in the world she loved more than riding and at least with the reigns in her hands she felt as if she had some control over her own life.

As Arye grew in her confidence, the pace became faster and bolder. Her hair waving in the wind as it used to back at home. For a second she could almost hear Robb’s laugh at her back and the distant sound of her mother’s voice shouting at her to slow down and ride like a lady. She blinked her eyes as if by doing that she would be able to see her father by a distant tree waving his hand. Suddenly there were tears on her eyes as Arya realized that no matter what she did, they would never come back.

She looked back and saw the Red Keep in all of its decadent glory. Her new home was more like a cursed castle from a dark fairy tale or a novel with all the dragons, gargoyles, and towers. She wanted Winterfell’s grey walls and the safety of her former room. She wanted her family and the friends she made in the North and not all those strange faces that looked at her with silent curiosity.

Arya tried to run faster as if the speed could operate the miracle of making all those feelings go away. As she cried silently she heard someone approaching her at ferocious speed. Arya looked around to see another rider on a dark horse, running to reach her.

Although she was superb rider, the man managed to reach her. It was when Arya noticed that her cousin was the one trying hard to get to her horse as if Arya was indeed trying to do something dangerous. She slowed down at the sight of Jon’s distress and he followed her pace.

“What in hell were you doing?” He asked exasperated. In fact, it was almost like as if he was in panic.

“I was just riding.” Arya answered while rubbing her eyes with the sleeves of her shirt. “Haven’t you told me that I could do whatever I wanted here? Have you changed your mind already?” Her voice came out harshly and that was probably the reason why her cousin looked back at her with those gentle and understanding eyes. Once more she felt ashamed about her behavior and how unfair it was to him.

“You were riding so fast that I thought you were running away already.” He answered her with the same condescending tone. “I hadn’t realized that maybe…You just wanted to be alone for a while. I’m sorry to disturb you.”

“No…You just…You just startled me.” Arya answered back awkwardly. “I like horses. Riding again felt so familiar that my mind went back ho…To Winterfell, I mean.”

“Your home.” He corrected her. “It’s probably too soon for me to expect you to think of the Keep as such. I hope you will…One day.”

“I guess I could…With a bit of time.” Arya answered tiredly. “It looks so frightening though…With all this dragons and gargoyles.”

“They were all my companions during my adventures.” Jon answered her with a discreet smile. “I would fight them to death to rescue the princess in the tower. Of course there was no princess, but it gave me some real experience with fighting monsters.”

She couldn’t help laughing at his attempt of a joke. Arya could imagine him as a child running around the castle with a play sword in hand to fight all those stone creatures to save someone. It was an adorable image and it reminded her of Rickon.

“They don’t seem so scary now, do they?” Jon asked her kindly.

“No, they don’t.” She answered with a sight. “I’m sorry for scarring you like this. It wasn’t my intention.”

“I was too precipitated. It would be nice to have some companion to my daily rides, if you like to accompany me. It will give you the chance to meet the locals. I don’t know if this sort of things interest you, but they can be quite friendly even with one as awkward as I am.” He suggested politely.

“As long as you don’t mind my clothes. I hate wearing dresses to ride almost as much as I hate a lady’s saddle.” Arya answered defiantly, making him nod.

“As you wish. I don’t care in the slightest about your clothes, but I can’t control the gossips that will follow. As long as you don’t mind them…” He said while gently turning his horse around.

“I guess I can handle it. I’m used to it anyway.” Arya said after biting her bottom lip.

“There’s something I want to show you. I guess you’ll like it.” He said turning his head to look at the woods. “Would you like me to show you?”

“I guess so.” Arya answered.

“Follow me then.” He said.

Jon quietly led the way into the woods as Arya followed him closely. The place reminded her of the woods back at Winterfell, although the weather was warmer and the air smelled richer with flowers and wild berries scents at the Red Keep’s woods. Once more it felt like a fairy tale and Arya waited for leprechauns and fairies to show up on their way.

It didn’t take much for her to hear the distant sound of water. There was a stream gently running and on the other side a great tree with its trunk as white as bones and red leaves. Jon stopped his horse and dismount the animal.

“Is that a heart tree?” Arya asked in awe as they approached the natural sanctuary carefully.

“My father had it brought here shortly after he married my mother.” Jon announced. “I guess you had one back at Winterfell.”

“Father used to say that it was a place where the old gods lived. As a child I would go there to look for fairies and other supernatural creatures.” She said with a faint smile playing on her lips.

“Did you ever find any?” Jon asked her teasingly.

“Just dragonflies and toads, I’m afraid.” Arya said before getting down the horse and giving the reigns to Jon so she could approach the tree. “There’s something mighty and phantasmagoric about this trees. Even if you don’t believe in the old gods, you can feel this ancient force filling the air around a place like this.”

“I like the quietness.” Jon pointed. “I’m not a religious man, even when Tarly says that I would have been a good priest if I had put my mind to it. I don’t feel any divine presence inside a church, but in a place like this everything becomes magical, don’t you think?”

“You are rather poetic, cousin.” Arya pointed as she touched the trunk of the tree and traced the painted face.

“I’m fond of poetry.” He said. “Not that I have the talent for it, but I like it. It’s a bit of a disappointment to my father, actually. He expected me to inherit his talent for music.”

“I guess I can relate to that. My sister was a good musician and singer. I like poetry though. The sound of it, I mean. I can't write them either, but I have tried to write a story about pirates once.” Arya said fondly.

“I can imagine you sailing the seven seas and fighting sea creatures fearlessly. It reminds me of something I read in old papers we used to collect about Anne Bonny and Mary Reed. Both of them were pirates and very famous in their time.”

“I would love to explore the world like in Verne’s books, be a pirate, or an explorer while my sister thought the greatest adventure she would have in life would be the season in London.” She rolled her eyes at the memory of it. “I don’t see how the season could be more fascinating that ships and all the wonders in the world, but I guess I’ll never be able to understand my sister’s mind.”

“I would prefer the ships too. I guess you’ll be the one to lead my next adventure.” Jon said vaguely, making her look back at him curiously.

“How so?” Arya asked.

“I’ll have to go to Winterfell at some point to visit the place and take care of some formalities. I think it would be for the best to have someone who knows the place by my side when the time comes.” He answered simply. “We could take the chance to spend some time in London. We don’t have to attend sumptuous dinners and things like that. We could do something you like instead.”

“I have only visit London to see the museums and by clothes with mother.” Arya said. “I would like very much to do something different. I’ve never been to the theater or the opera. Mother thought it improper for me to frequent society before Sansa was married, but truth be told I guess she was just sparing me the humiliation of being ignored.”

“Oh…I see.” He seemed shy at her information. “I suppose we should come up with an event to introduce you formally when you are feeling up to it. You are the new lady at the Red Keep after all and you should at least be introduced to local society and I don’t see how anyone could ignore someone like you here or anywhere really.”

“You know nothing about how to act near me, do you?” She asked with a teasingly smile and he replied with a relieved one.

“Not really.” He admitted. “It has been a long time since I had cared about a woman and I never had a real lady living under my roof so I can only hope that you’ll be patient.”

“Thank you, Jon.” She said gently.

“Why?” He sounded confused.

“For being so kind to me.” She said sadly. “I’m not used to such a careful attention or to be protected like this. Thank you for making the effort to welcome me.”

“It’s not an effort, Arya.” Her name sounded nice in his low voice. “You are welcome.”

   

  

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> At some point I want to make it darker and a bit spooky, but Jon doesn't seem to be interested in cooperating with me in this. I'm dying with fluffiness in this chapter!  
> I'm really afraid of making him sound too much as an awkward guy, but my idea is to portray a man that doesn't have a mother and was mostly ignored by his absent father, used to be the master of the house and created by a number of servants that although competent and carrying couldn't make him any less lonely. Arya on the other hand was used to deal with a numerous family and some times her own family made her feel miserable, especially Cat and Sansa. I'm very concerned in creating a bond where there was absolutely nothing.  
> I hope you'll like this chapter and reviews are welcome as usual.


	3. Chapter 3

Almost two months pasted since Arya arrived at the Red Keep. To some degree, that old castle and its dragons became a bit less frightening even if it would require more time for her to feel comfortable to call it home.

During all this time her cousin had done his best to make Arya feel both welcome and happy with her new life. They would often go for a ride and he would introduce her to all the locals, being particularly mindful about her title and the fact that she was now what he called “the lady of the house”. This was something she would have to get used to since that kind of title was usually given to her sister whenever their mother wasn’t near and it made Arya sound like Jon’s wife, instead of the only woman to live in the Red Keep.

She was positive that most of the locals were under the impression that Jon was courting her, when he was just trying to deal with the presence of a woman under his care the best way he could. Although this idea was somewhat uncomfortable it was also understandable, given the fact that in two decades there has been no lady in the Red Keep.

During those months she had written to her sister several times, describing in details her new life at the Red Keep and asking for a piece of advice in which concerned her original plan of finding an occupation elsewhere once she was of age, but no answer came from her sister in months, until that cold autumn morning when Jeyne brought her the mail.

Arya grabbed the letter and opened it eagerly, but as soon as she read the first paragraph she came to regret her enthusiasm.

_“I’m sorry for not answering you earlier, but you must understand that since the baby was born I have had little time to anything else. By the way your niece is a strong and healthy girl, with red hair and blue eyes, but for some reason she refuses to behave. She cries all the time whenever I hold her. It makes Harry impatient, but I’m sure that with time and determination from my part, little Cat will be a perfect little lady._

_It relives me to know that our cousin is a decent man that treats you well, although you should keep in mind that you must behave accordingly to your name. You may not have the land and the tittles, but you are a Stark and a lady. Quit this nonsense of male cloths, you are no longer a child to behave like this and in your place I would be more concerned about finding myself a respectable position in society instead of this governess madness._

_I know you are not particularly remarkable in your beauty, but surely you could make an effort to be charming and kind to your guardian. Since Lord Stark is so invested in your care, perhaps you should keep in mind that he is a single man with tittles and land that could make you Lady of Winterfell. A marriage between you and our cousin would be not only a welcome possibility, but a very desirable one._

_Think of it, Arya. Wouldn’t it be wonderful to run your own household and have your children as heirs to Winterfell? Mother would want this for you and I’m sure that even Father would love to have you back at Winterfell as its rightful lady. Be smart, sister. Be wise and seize this opportunity to secure both the Stark name and your future._

_With love,_

_Sansa.”_

After reading the letter Arya thorn it and gave it to the fire angrily. As the paper burn she could listen to her sister’s voice speaking those words again and again. It seemed that not even with their parents death they would ever be able to see eye to eye and Arya would never fail to be a disappointment to her sister, no matter what she did.

Once more the walls made of red stone around her felt more like a foreign and frightening place. Those dragons painted everywhere looked at her with hunger and threat. Arya was trapped inside that place, with no friends of her own and relying on the charity of a man she barely knew. By the tone of that letter, Arya was also aware that her sister’s home would never be a refuge for her. She had to think of what to do with her life and consider that one day her cousin could get tired of her and cast her out without a second thought.

Someone knocked the door of her room, dragging Arya back to reality as she whipped away her tears of anger and frustration before allowing the person to get in.

She turned to face the door and see Jon looking at several papers on his hands with obvious exasperation.

“I was wondering if you could help me with a few things.” He said in a distracted way. “Who is Vayon Poole?”

“It’s our butler at Winterfell. Why?” Arya answered simply.

“I seem to have angered the man somehow just because I asked for a detailed report on the household staff and goods. I must know what I inherited, mustn’t I?” He said out of frustration. “Instead of a report I received a letter saying in no uncertain terms that I would know the castle in details once I actually become the Lord of Winterfell.”

“This sound like something Mr. Poole would say. I’m sorry about it, Jon.” Arya answered apologetically. “The whole staff will have problems accepting you if you remain here. I can write him asking for the report that you want. I’m sure he won’t oppose a request like this if I ask.”

“I would really appreciate that, cousin.” He said sympathetically. “There’s also a Cassel that keeps talking about this festival. I have no idea what this is all about.”

“An annual event. Winter is harsh up North and by know I guess the harvest is done. We have this festival organized to thank the workers and eventually trade with neighbors and industrials our production, before winter.” Arya pointed. “It’s usually funny and everybody waits for it with enthusiasm. Cassel must be worried about the cost of it and if there will be a festival or not.”

“Should I keep the tradition?” He asked her. “I have no idea of what to do.”

“The locals like it and father used to say that it was important to thank them properly for the hard work. It’s also an opportunity for business.” Arya answered as a matter of fact. “And you should be there too for the moral support and negotiations. They don’t know you and they are likely curious to know what to expect of you as their new lord.”

“I guess a trip North will be inevitable at some point. If only I didn’t have so much to deal with here right now.” Jon sighed.

“I can also give instructions to Cassel so he can start the preparations. It would also be nice request for a report on the production and the tenants, so you can decide how to proceed next year.” She answered confidently.

“Do you know how to do it?” He asked suspiciously.

“I used to help Robb with the figures and helping with the organization of the festival was something mother insisted that both me and Sansa should do.” She answered with a shy smile.

“What would I do without you, little cousin?” He asked fondly. “I heard that Lady Aryn wrote to you. How is cousin Sansa?”

Arya tried hard to not think of Sansa’s critics. She did her best to smile at him.

“I have a niece with blue eyes and red hair like her mother.” Arya said, trying to sound cheerful about it. “My sister seems to find motherhood tiring.”

“Well, I suppose it’s not something unusual. I’m glad to hear that she is well and happy to know that I have a new little cousin too. What is her name?” Jon asked kindly.

“Cat. Short for Catelyn like my mother, I guess.” Arya said.

“You are a terrible at disguising your sadness. I hope you know that.” He said while putting all the papers to rest on her study table. “Did your sister’s words made you homesick and sad again?”

“Not exactly.” She answered feeling exhausted. “My sister has always been difficult to deal with. We weren’t close and I hoped that after our lost we would somehow overcome our differences, but I was too naïve to think so.”

“What is it that she said to upset you so much, little cousin?” He asked with his usual kindness, using the pet name he had adopted to call her whenever they were alone.

“The usual things. I should me more like a lady and quit using male cloths to ride and things like that. She thinks I should find myself a respectable position in society instead of…” She stopped abruptly when she considered that her plans at that point mint sound ungrateful and cruel to him. “Never mind. I will never do the right thing according to her perception.”

“You have a respectable position here.” Jon insisted. “What is it that cousin Sansa thinks that I’m doing to you?”

“Nothing really. She is just insisting that I should find myself a good husband instead of doing things on my own.” Arya sighed. “I don’t want you to think that I am ungrateful for what you are doing, but…I don’t want to live under your mercy and care indefinitely. I have an education and I guess I could put it to use somehow, working as a governess or something like this.”

For a second Arya saw all his usual kindnesses crumble and turn into something else. She couldn’t say if it was panic or anger.

“Why would you want something like that?” He asked in a hollow voice. “A governess? What sort of idea is this? Do you think your income to be insufficient, or is it something that I’ve done to make you think that I’m doing all of this out of mercy and pity?”

“I told you I don’t want you to think that I’m ungrateful for what you are doing, but let’s face the truth, Jon. One day I won’t fit your plans and I don’t want to be a burden to you or anyone else for that matter. Besides…I want to have a purpose. Something to occupy my mind and give me a sense of fulfillment.”

“What about Winterfell?” He asked harshly. “Don’t you want to have a say about it?”

“It’s yours to do what you want with it. As a woman I can’t inherit it, or the title. I have no power over the property and even if you kindly decide to allow me to go back there I would still be under you favor and mercy. I would be just another item to be put in your reports.” Arya replied just as convicted.

Jon made a pause as if he was about to say something and the choice of words wasn’t helping.

“I guess we are not speaking the same language here.” He sighed. “Arya, what you suggest is simply out of question. I won’t allow a woman of your rank and education to go out of here to find a position in some obscure house as a governess. As for the safety of your position in society and your future, I have already considered it and I thought it was clear by now.”

“What exactly should be clear?” She asked defiantly.

“It’s the practical and reasonable thing to be done.” He said soberly as if he was certain of all matters in the universe. “Life is unpredictable and although I’m young there’s no way to predict if I’ll be alive in a year time or even a day. Have you considered what would be of you in case I die? Where would you live? Who would take care of you and your money? I guess Lord Eddard never considered that his sons might not out live him to inherit the title and property, so he named the next Lord of Winterfell the legal guardian of all his children that might be underage and unmarried daughters in the occasion of his death. This is my responsibility and when I received the news that I would become the legal guardian of an unwedded young woman that had no other family but me, it was quite obvious to me what should be done. I wanted to talk about it once your mourning period was over, but now seems to be the right time approach the matter.” Jon looked straightly at her, with a confidence Arya hadn’t known he possessed. “Since the day you arrived I was convicted that I should marry you and I thought you would consider it as a desirable match too.”

Arya gave a step back and looked at him with sudden strangeness and fear. He was in her room, unchaperoned and revealing that he intended to make her his wife. The simple idea of it sounded oppressive and invasive.

“Why would I think like this? You were a strange to me.” She said out of shock.

“I didn’t expect you to think like this right away. I assumed your mind would take some time to overcome the grief and consider your possibilities for the future.” Jon pointed as calmly and controlled as could. “If you think of it carefully now, you’ll see that what I’m saying is quite reasonable. It would make you Lady Stark of Winterfell, a title that should be yours by merit if not law. You would be able to go back to your home and I would be more than happy to have your help and advice to rule the place. Name, money, a house and a highly respectable position, this is everything that I can offer you.”

“You sound just like my sister.” Arya said filling suddenly dizzy.

“But unlike her I have no intention to change the person you are. You don’t like wearing a dress to ride, you don’t have talent for music, poetry, needlework…I don’t care about it. You are resourceful and intelligent. You know Winterfell and its people. You have a sense of humor and a charming nature. I like your companion.” Jon insisted. “You want adventures and I could give you them.”

“At least you didn’t say that you love me.” She answered. “I wouldn’t know what to do with that information. You make it sound so logical and practical as if there would be no feelings involved in the process or intimacy to be shared.”

“I never took you for a woman of romantic disposition, little cousin.” He said calmly. If he was offended Arya couldn’t tell. “I’m not dashing soldier in red uniform, or a breathtaking pirate, or whatever it is that ladies dream about, but I’m reliable and surely not the ugliest man alive. This intimacy you talked about…” He seemed to be embarrassed to approach the matter in so openly. “I wouldn’t demand it of you until you felt comfortable with the idea. We would keep separate chambers, so you would have your privacy respected.”

“Why would you go through so much trouble? Marring a woman you barely know, just to grant her safety? I don’t understand your motives, cousin. I don’t understand them at all.” She insisted.

“Would it be easier to believe my good intentions, if I claimed that I love you?” He asked back. His voice sounded kind and condescending. “Oh, sweet cousin…I have loved once and she was taken from me in a disastrous way. This passion novels talk about so eloquently brought me nothing but suffering. If a selfish reason for my plan is what you want, then I’ll give you one. I enjoy your friendship and company; above all I treasure your opinion and intelligence. I believe you would make me a happy man and I can be good for you, if you give me the chance.”

“Am I allowed to disagree with your plan or you already settled a date?” She asked miserably, making Jon immediately distressed.

“I won’t force you to accept me, Arya. This is not a command for you to follow.” He gave a step forward in an agitated way. “If anything this is the worst marriage proposal ever made, but if you think about what I’ve just said…I’m convinced that it means the prospect of a good and happy life for both of us. Take your time to think about it and if you think that I’m not what you want I won’t insist on the matter and you are free to find someone you love.”

“Leave me alone.” She answered him sharply while feeling devastated inside. “I want to be alone to think of all this madness with a clear mind.”

“Of course.” He said while bowing his head lightly in respect and embarrassment before turning his back at her to leave the room.

He stopped half way to the door, though; looking back at her with his mouth mimicking words he couldn’t say. Arya ignored him for a while, too angry to even consider looking at him without resentment over his scheming mind. More than never she felt trapped and cheated by his kindness. It was desolating to realize that she had no friends inside that place.

“I’m sorry for…For bringing up the matter in such a careless way.” He said.

“Go away.” After her harsh command, Jon finally gave up and left the room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Troubles ahead. Arya finally realizes that she is somehow trapped in the Red Keep, even when Jon's intentions are good ones. I wanted to extend this chapter a bit, but why don't use this cliffhanger?  
> Reviews are highly appreciated.


	4. Chapter 4

In the night her mind would not silence, not even after days avoiding Jon’s presence. Arya laid in bed restless, with her empty stomach twisting and turning for the lack of food and excess of anxiety. She cried until her head ached terribly, but the sleep would not come easily. She felt trapped and suffocated by the red walls, the curtains and even the sheets in her bed.

She looked at the lonely vase filled with pale blue roses, exotic and lonely in their blue beauty like she felt inside that castle. It was with desolation that Arya realized she had nowhere else to go and even if she decided to escape the castle and find a life of her own elsewhere, Jon could easily confiscate her money and get the police to track her before she could reach a safe place.

Sansa wouldn’t help her either. If anything, Lady Aryn would be the first one to write back to Jon informing of Arya’s whereabouts and probably adding on post scrip her adamant support to his plan while begging him to forgive her sister’s reckless and scandalous manners.

At least Jon has been gracious enough to find some business to attend in the nearest town. The short trip would keep him away until the next morning and during his absence Arya had tried to find out with the servants who was the woman he had loved and lost. No one would dare to say a word about the matter, which kept Arya wondering what sort of tragic story was behind her cousin’s heart, especially now that he had made the most absurd marriage proposal to her.

The reasons of his proposal were indeed obvious and plenty. Were her a bit more similar to all the women she had known in life, Arya would have jumped at the offer, despite of her bruised ego for not being the love interest of the gentleman and just his convenient friend with a proper family name of respectable up bring.

Even when the idea of loving a man seemed foreign and not entirely appreciated by her, she had it in her a small part of vanity that yearned for admiration. She would never have poems written to praise her beauty like Sansa had before her marriage to Henry, or even young bachelors fighting each other for the pleasure of her company during a soirées, but if marriage happened to Arya Stark, she at least wished for passion.

During all his speech Jon wouldn’t stop talking of the practical aspects of such a union, but he was at least gracious enough to reinforce what he liked about her. He called her a friend, whose intelligence and company he treasured, something that could be said of a sibling or a childhood friend you admired, but not the material for a romance of any kind.

Perhaps she was being too hopeful and naïve to aspire the greatness of love like books would describe. Love was meant for the fair ones, not an orphan girl of plain complexion and no especial accomplishments to recommend her. Jon was, after all, the best suitor she could ever aspire to find and he was considered the most eligible bachelor in the county. He was young and wealthy, heir to the Red Keep and Lord of Winterfell. Besides he was somewhat handsome, with his exotic hair and beard to make him look more like a man of adventurous nature. His skin was fair and his eyes were grey and gentle, especially when he smiled shyly at her.

Arya rose from her bed and lit a lamp, decided to find her way to the kitchen and get at least a cup of warm milk to fill her empty stomach. Arya dressed her night robe, grabbed her lamp and left her room trying to not make any noise that could call for unwanted attention.

On her way to the great hall Arya heard a distant sound, like slow steps against the floor. At such an hour she expected the whole castle to be soundly asleep, but as she walked to the kitchens, the sound of steps became more persistent.

Arya reached the great staircase that leaded to the hall and connected the east and west wing. The place was freezing. She looked around and spotted a window that had been left open, allowing the cold winds of autumn to howl across the empty hallways and corridors. Arya approached the window to close it. Her lamp’s light flickered at the force of the howling wind.

Again she heard the steps, as she pushed the window to close it. Arya turned her head and for a second she saw a long and slender shadow walking toward the west wing corridor and disappearing in the darkness.

Her fist impulse was to follow the shadow out of curiosity; her second impulse was to follow the shadow out of defiance over Jon’s orders. With her lamp in hand she walked toward the west wing corridor, but before she could reach it another lamp downstairs called her attention.

“Arya?” Jon’s low voice sounded in the darkness of the great hall. “What are you doing out of bed at such an hour?”

She turned to face him and decided to let go of the idea of following that strange shadow.

“I was going to the kitchen for a bit of milk.” She answered simply as she went down the stairs to meet him. “I thought you would only arrive tomorrow morning.”

“I managed to finish my business earlier. I didn’t want to spend another night out.” He said soberly. “I’m hungry too, so I guess we can have a late meal.”

Jon offered her his arm and conducted Arya to the empty kitchen silently. As they walked Arya noticed that he smelled of horses and leather. His clothes were a bit dusty and Arya could only conclude that he had been riding for hours.

Arya took a place at the table as Jon walked around looking for them to eat. He seemed to be quite familiar with the place, especially when he found a jar full with fresh biscuits. Jon put water to boil and served her a cup of milk before tea was ready. He prepared the tea pot and cups as if he had done it a thousand times before. He served her tea before taking his own sit in front of her.

“Are you used to sneak into the kitchen like this?” She asked as she took a biscuit.

“I sleep very badly and eating is some sort of distraction. The cook is generally mad at me for steeling treats since I discovered where she hides them.” He answered before taking a bite. “I was seven.”

“You were a naughty little boy then?” Arya asked before sipping on her tea.

“It happens when you are the master of the house and no one is really allowed to give you limits.” He answered with a smile. Arya realized that she had missed those shy smiles.

“How was your trip?” She asked trying to look away from his face, focusing on her biscuit.

“Tiresome, but other than that it was pretty satisfactory. Sam sends his best wishes to you and his wife invited us to dinner next time we are in town.” He said in his usual gentle way.

“Why risking your life making this journey in the middle of the night? You were pretty reckless.” Arya said vigorously, making his grin even more evident.

“No need to worry, little cousin. I was quite careful in my way back. I just couldn’t stay there any longer knowing that you were here all by yourself.” He said.

“I’m not an incapable child. Besides, the staff is here.” She answered in an annoyed way.

“Not incapable, but definitely a defying one. I’m not stupid. I saw you moving toward the west wing corridor when I arrived. What were you thinking?” He asked in a more sober way, making her shrug her shoulders.

“I thought I’ve seen someone. A shadow of a person moving that way. I heard steps too.” She answered with embarrassment.

“No one lives in that part of the castle and places as old as this tend to be noisy. You probably had your vision tricked in the darkness.” He said in a firm way. “Please, don’t go there again. Can you imagine what sort of accident could have happened?”

“Fine.” She replied before sipping her tea again.

For a while they were silent and the only sounds that could be heard were those of eating and drinking. Although they were both uncomfortable with all the recent events, there was also a sense of familiarity and comfort in sharing a late meal with him.

“I need to know something.” She finally announced, breaking the silence in the place. “If I am to consider your proposal seriously, I must know.”

That seemed to startle him. Jon straightened his back and tried to put up a brave face.

“Anything you want. You just have to ask.” He said.

“You mentioned that you have loved someone and it ended badly for some reason.” Arya said convicted. “Who was she and what happened exactly?”

“I’m surprised that the staff hasn’t told you.” Jon said in a week attempt of humor. “Her name is Ygritte. She was the daughter of a local farmer and I meet her shortly after I finished my studies. She was older and charming, while I was terribly naïve. I fell in love with her and I thought that she was in love with me.”

“I assume you were wrong.” Arya completed.

“She used to say that I knew nothing and I guess she was right about it. I was determinate to marry her and when my father found out he threatened to disinherit me. In my youthful boldness I said I didn’t want his money, property and title. I went straight to her house to tell her we would run away to the city and start a life together without my father’s money, but the prospect of being a simple lawyer’s wife didn’t sound as appealing as being the Lady of Red Keep.” His voice sounded melancholic and also embarrassed. “Two months latter our breakup a military regiment came to town and Ygritte found herself a handsome sergeant with good connections and money to his name. They got married shortly after and by the time the whole county knew that I had been rejected. It gave the locals a lot to talk about for a while.”

“I…I’m sorry to know that. I had no idea.” Arya said with genuine respect for his feelings. “Is this why you emphasized so much the fact that you could make me Lady of Winterfell? Do you think this is all that I care about?”

“I never thought about it exactly, but I guess my past experience with marriage proposals made me say that.” Jon said mindlessly. “I’m not implying that you are a frivolous woman or anything of the sorts…No! Far from it!”

“But it would be the reasonable thing to do.” Arya answered bitterly. “How I hate it. How I hate this imposed need of propriety and reason that the world demands of us women. I wish I could simply act out of impulse, regardless to anyone’s idea of what a young lady should or shouldn’t do.”

“What would you do if you could act out of impulse?” He asked. “I promise you I won’t take it as an offense, no matter what you say.”

“That you are a stupid thing. If I were to choose a man for myself I would chose for who he is and not what he has. As for my lack of romantic nature, well I don’t consider myself particularly romantic, but you made me feel like bird that you keep on a cage hopping that it will sing to you whenever you want. I’m not this kind of woman.” Arya said sharply. “Say whatever you want about my behavior, but…I know I’m not a beauty and that you are probably the best suitor I’ll ever have, but…At least when I’m proposed I would like to feel as if I were someone’s dream and not just a friend whose company is appreciated. You hurt my pride, Jon. You made me feel a helpless piece of property that you are deciding how to deal with and I have literally no power to decide what to do with my life. No friends to support me, not even my sister would have me if I decided to run away from this awful place where I feel lonely all the time…Except…Except when you are here.” She whipped away a stubborn tear that insisted to fall from her eyes. “It makes me realize that I have no one left and you are the only thing in my life that gives me a sense of belonging. What am I suppose to do with this?”

For a long minute Jon said nothing. He stared at his cup as if considering what she had just said and trying to deal with the harshness of her words somehow.

“I didn’t want you to feel this way. I’m sorry about all the stupid things I’ve said to you and for making you feel like some property.” He said in a hurt voice. “I really don’t know what to say to fix all the damage I already caused, but Arya…Since you arrived here, regardless to what I thought to be the right thing to do about your future, I found in you someone I admire. I’ve felt lonely almost my entire life here, but you give this awful place color and light.” He sighed. “Have you made up your mind already?”

“No. Not yet.” She answered modestly. Jon nod his head soberly.

Jon looked down and started searching his pockets for something. Arya observed as he took of his coach a small book full of signs of use.

“I was at Tarly’s house when I found this.” He showed her the book. It was a collection of poetries from Caroline Norton. “I never thought a woman would put in words what I feel right now, but once I read it…I couldn’t stop thinking of you and that made me come back home earlier. May I read it to you?”

“Go on.” She said calmly. Jon cleared his throat as he searched the book for the right poem.

_“I do not love thee!—no! I do not love thee!_

_And yet when thou art absent I am sad;_

_And envy even the bright blue sky above thee,_

_Whose quiet stars may see thee and be glad.”_

His voice was low and gentle as he read the poem out loud, and Jon would look at her at every verse as if he didn’t trust her enough to pay attention. Arya couldn’t be more focused in what he said. The sound of his voice was soothing and every world seemed to nest in her heart, making her feel warm inside.

_“I do not love thee!—yet, I know not why,_

_Whate’er thou dost seems still well done, to me:_

_And often in my solitude I sigh_

_That those I do love are not more like thee!”_

As the poem went on and Arya paid attention to all those words, slowly she realized that those verses fitted her as well.

_“I do not love thee!—yet, when thou art gone,_

_I hate the sound (though those who speak be dear)_

_Which breaks the lingering echo of the tone_

_Thy voice of music leaves upon my ear.”_

Arya was certain that she wasn’t in love with him, but she missed his stern and solid presence, his gentle eyes and kind smiles. When Jon was around, the emptiness in her chest became bearable.

_“I do not love thee!—yet thy speaking eyes,_

_With their deep, bright, and most expressive blue,_

_Between me and the midnight heaven arise,_

_Oftener than any eyes I ever knew.”_

No, she didn’t love him either, but she enjoyed his company well enough. Jon wasn’t a humorous sort of man, but he would often try to make her smile and laugh and that was probably what she liked the most about him.

_“I know I do not love thee! yet, alas!_

_Others will scarcely trust my candid heart;_

_And oft I catch them smiling as they pass,_

_Because they see me gazing where thou art.”_

He looked at her gently as he put the book aside. For a second he considered what to say next and in a surprisingly bold movement, Jon took one of her hands and caressed it tenderly.

“Your hands are so small…” He pointed out as if he didn’t know what to say. “You see…I’m not a man that is easily consumed by devastating passions. I’m not even sure if I’m capable of more fiery feelings, but during these days you were avoiding me and my trip I couldn’t stop thinking of the things I wanted to show you, or how I missed our conversations. Tarly even complained that I wouldn’t stop talking about you.”

“What do you expect me to do with this information?” Arya asked shyly. “It’s still not enough for me to commit to your plan. I must be reasonable after all.”

“Take the time you need.” He said gently while still holding her hand. “You said you wanted to feel like someone’s dream when you were proposed to, didn’t you? Well…I guess I have been sleeping for a long time until you came, bringing these flashes of light and bright memories. I guess this is not love, but…I don’t really want to wake up from this dream.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now Jon seems to have had some pretty good advises from Sam on "How to propose to a lady without looking like an idiot". But no. Arya won't give her answer right away, not even after the poem. I think Caroline Norton's poem fit the context nicely, but I admit that I don't have enough domain of English to really comprehend poetry, although I really love it. Tell me what you think.  
> Reviews are most welcome and appreciated.


	5. Chapter 5

_“I do not love thee!...Yet.”_ The line kept coming to her mind for days, making Arya uncomfortable and anxious without reason. How could a bunch of words have such a tremendous effect on her, was beyond Arya’s comprehension.

The routine in the Red Keep as well as the dynamics between her and Jon didn’t change much except for Jon’s sudden interest in music. When he said that he lacked the talent for it, Arya realized he was being modest. Although he wasn’t an exceptional musician, his skills by the piano were more than respectable and competent.

He would play something for her every night after supper. He tried to keep the tunes light and joyous even when the weight in the lower keys would often give the melody a dark and melancholic interpretation. It was no less sweet though, and it made her remember of home and how Robb and Bran would sing loudly after a glass of scotch while Sansa played the piano. Sometimes her father would pick her up and dance with her across the room as Arya’s feet swayed in the air in a childlike way.

Jon managed to persuade her to play duets with him and although Arya couldn’t say if he was being just polite to compliment her, it felt good to do it. She even sang that night, something she had never thought she was really able to do, but Jon was kind enough to point that she was pursuing the wrong vocal extension instead of mastering the right one.

“You have a beautiful contralto voice. Why do you insist on pursuing soprano’s notes?” He asked gently once they finished the duet.

“I guess because Sansa would tease me for not singing like her.” Arya answered annoyed.

“You should find your own voice.” He said before choosing another song.

As the days passed, the black of her garments started to annoy her more often than not. Although Arya was still in full mourning for her parents and siblings, the black of her dresses weighted on her, making it difficult to cope with the future she had yet to plan.

She had never considered herself vain or particularly attentive to her looks, but as she admired her figure in the mirror the reflex seemed that of a wild child instead of a woman grown.  Her skirt barely reached her ankles and the bodice of her dresses didn’t seem to fit her as it used to. Her hair was also becoming a nuisance, all tangled and full of knots as it felt loosely over her shoulders.

Her mother was no longer near to say it was about time for her to wear more womanly clothes, or at least clothes that fit her body in the right way, so she supposed it was time to consult another woman in order to have a second opinion on the matter.

Jeyne couldn’t be happier to put her skills as hairdresser to good use. She proudly announced that she had learned how to comb a lady’s hair in a magazine and she had been practicing her skills in her friends while waiting for the day Arya would require them.

Her maid also took it upon her to call for a local seamstress to make Arya new dresses, already dreaming about the day in which Arya would give up wearing boy’s clothes. That wouldn’t happen any time soon as long horses walked the Earth, but at least she would look more presentable.

If Jon noticed her sudden expenses, he didn’t say a world. He didn’t even bother to ask who was the old woman that came to visit Arya. Jon probably just assumed that it was a neighbor. The packages with her things came a few weeks later, and although Arya had asked only for two simple dresses in half mourning colors, being grey and lavender her colors of choice, she noticed that several other pieces had been sent to her, including an evening gown richly made.

Jeyne helped her to get dressed and combed her hair in an elegant bun. When Jeyne was done with her, Arya looked at the mirror and for a second she was shocked. No…She would never be half as beautiful as Sansa was, but at least now she could see herself as a young woman of some grace and with enough effort she could even be considered pretty.

That night she went down the stairs in order to join Jon at the dinner room for supper, feeling a bit anxious about her looks and what Jon would think about it. Once she reached the dinner room and Jon turned to see her, Arya couldn’t help feeling embarrassed by the way he looked at her.

“I have to say that this…This is a really nice change.” He said in his usual clumsy way while rising from his sit to welcome her. “You look lovely, dear cousin.”

“I hope it’s not too much. I was a bit tired of full mourning garments.” She said before biting her bottom lip. “The seamstress said it was simple and elegant, but what do I know about these things?”

“I wouldn’t know what to say about ladies fashion, but I like it. The lavender suits you.” He said.

“She sent me more dresses than what I asked for.” Arya pointed as she took her place at the table. “I wonder why.”

“I was surprised that you only asked for two dresses.” Jon answered. “Mrs. Smallwood graciously pointed me that a lady of your rank and beauty should have a number of them, when I meet her on her way out. The evening gown was my idea though. I thought you should have at least one for the occasion of your introduction to society.”

“Not that this is happening any time soon.” Arya added calmly.

“In fact it might be sooner than you think.” Jon said after drinking from his glass. “A ball seemed to be a bit too much, but I decided to have a small soirées here before we go North; just a small celebration among locals, since we won’t be back until spring.”

“Are you serious?” Arya asked in utter delight. “Winterfell?!”

“Well, I’m quite serious. The festival will be delayed in a few weeks, but Cassel said it could be done. With your help in the organization, I don’t see how this could go wrong.” Jon said with genuine enthusiasm. “We can have Christmas there and we could have a week or two in London on our way back.”

“I thought you have much to do around here.” Arya pointed. “Why the sudden change of plans?”

“Sam gave me some good news the last time I meet him and my business here will be under control while we are away.” Jon answered with a satisfied smile, as if he was relieved to do what he wanted for once in his life. “You’ll be able to show me everything about Winterfell and let’s hope the staff and tenants won’t be disappointed. We could invite Lord and Lady Aryn to celebrate Christmas with us, if you like.”

Arya remained in silence for a second, while they took the time to savor dinner. She missed having someone of her family near, but even after all the tragedy in their lives, Arya doubted that her relationship with her sister would ever improve to the point of making it easy to stay near her.

“I suppose I can give it a thought, although the idea of having my sister near is indeed frightening.” Arya tried to conceal her smile that was getting too big once she thought of going back home. “I can’t believe it! I’m going home! I’ll right to Mr. Poole before we go. I want Hot Pie to make us something delicious to eat. Perhaps butter cream tort. You’ll love it! And berry tarts too!”

“Who is Hot Pie?” Jon asked while laughing at her sudden enthusiasm.

“He works in the kitchen and he is the best with pastries and sweets. He’s just a bit older than me and he would help me get sweets before dinner, when I was younger. Just wait for you to taste these things with tea. You won’t want anything else in your life.”

“I’ll trust your word in this.” Jon smiled at her with genuine satisfaction. “I never thought you would be so happy with this news. I would have told you sooner if I had the slightest idea. What about the soirées? Are you excited about it as well?”

“I suppose, although I have no idea of what to do in such an event. I’m sure I’ll embarrass you and myself during it, but I’ll do my best to play the hostess.” Arya answered uncomfortably.

“There’s no need to worry. The guests will be too excited about being invited to the Red Keep. This shall make the event memorable enough. As for what we’ll do in this gathering, I guess we could dance. That is, if you’ll save me your first waltz, little cousin.” He said in a rather charming way. “I’m sure there will be plenty of other gentlemen that you might find interesting, but I do insist on having your first dance.”

Arya noticed with a bit of apprehension that his last line spoke volumes about his reasons to throw a party when Jon was indeed a discreet and reclusive sort of man. She had yet to give him an answer to his proposal, but given his sudden disposition to social events, Arya concluded that he was giving up hope of having her for his bride.

That would make things even more uncomfortable between them, or at least hush her into giving him a definitive answer.

“I thought it’s about time for you to be formally introduced to the local society. It’s not fair to keep you for my eyes only.” Jon added graciously. “And I do not intend to be an obstacle to your happiness. You are young and far too pretty to not have the chance to dance with all the gentlemen of the county.”

“You seem to be rather sure about a negative answer from my part.” Arya said critically.

“Since you haven’t given me any sign yet, I thought it would be only fair to allow you to see what options you have. I don’t mind it, Arya. As I said, you should have the chance to dance and enjoy yourself in this kind of events.” He insisted.

“Would it make things easier if I gave you an answer immediately after this dance you are so determinate to promote?” Arya asked boldly, making Jon consider her offer for a second.

“If you are certain that you are ready to give me an answer, than yes.” Jon replied in his usual controlled tone. “I would appreciate that.”

“When will this dance happen?” Arya asked before taking a bite at her shepherd’s pie.

“Two weeks, since it’s not a great ball. You can invite whomever you want to.” Jon added.

“I’ll make a list then.” Arya said.

And a list she made, although she barely knew anyone in the region aside from tenants. Her list would be considered outrageous, according to her mother’s perception of whom was worthy to invite to a social event, but at least she would pick a few tenants that she had befriended so she would see some familiar faces around her.

Arya wondered if Jon had any experience as a host. She didn’t think so given his choice of date and the fact that she was still supposed to be in mourning, but at least she wouldn’t be alone in her scandalous behavior. Arya suspected that Jon had no idea of what he was doing, but as he had said, the locals would be thrilled with the invitation and that would be enough to make the occasion memorable.

There was also the matter of his proposal and in two weeks Arya still hadn’t found an answer. Arya got dressed in her male cloths for a ride in hope that the fresh air would help her dealing with her confusion.

Harwin was surprised to see her at the stables that morning. The house was full of servants polishing every inch of the castle, decorating the ball room and preparing the food for that night while she was trying to run away to have a few minutes alone with her favorite horse.

“I thought milady would be busy combing your hair and putting up a dress for a change, but then I would think that something might be wrong in milady’s head.” Harwin pointed as Arya got on horseback.

“If I stay inside I’ll probably kill someone.” Arya answered sharply. “The good thing is…I’ll be home in a few days and I can barely wait for it.”

“Thought this was your home now.” Harwin answered in a sarcastic tone. “But I suppose that you will be lady of both houses soon enough once the boy get the guts to propose you.”

“What?” Arya looked at him in a startle.

“Oh…It’s ridiculous to see the two of you riding around the fields. The young master hasn’t been like this in years.” Harwin said boldly. “He smiles now! He would never do so, not even as a child. Master Jon was always a sour lad, although he does have a good nature. I thought milady would have figured that much, but I guess we are all a bit dumb in this matters.”

“Why would Jon ever want me for his wife? He surely could find something better than a plain girl like me.” Arya insisted, trying hard not to give away that Jon had already proposed her and she was the one filled with doubts.

“The two of you have a similar temper and milady had a pretty figure, but I guess is because the two of you are a bit weird. An odd creature recognizes the other.” Harwin said. “Women around here would give an eye to get his attentions because of the tittles and land, but Master Jon never seemed to care about them. You’ll see it tonight; all of the county’s beauties in their finest. They don’t have a clue of the kind of man he is, though.”

“I still don’t see why such a thing would be desirable. We barely know each other.” Arya insisted.

“And yet you are here talking about it with me.” Harwin laughed. “I feel like an old match maker. You should see your eyes whenever he is near. I would bat money that you will marry him in a year or two, if he ever finds the courage to ask you to.”

“You are a very impertinent man.” Arya answered bitterly, making Harwin laugh loudly.

“Milady asked my opinion. Now…You are by far the best lady we could get to run the house around here. I wouldn’t mind it a single bit and neither would the others. Jeyne is already dreaming about how pretty your babies will be.”

Arya got anxious at all that talking. She got down of the horse, suddenly feeling to agitated to even consider riding.

“Thought milady wanted to go for a ride.” Harwin pointed.

“I changed my mind. I guess I should do something like…I don’t know. Check the cutlery, maybe!”

Arya turned her back at Harwin and headed back to the castle, were Jeyne was already waiting for her with several questions about the organization of the festivity. Arya tried to help her in the best way she could, but there was little she could offer.

She looked at the ballroom and remembered with fondness that whenever her parents offered a ball, she would pip at the guests from the top of the stairs. Sometimes she would go after Bran and they would observe from their windows the guests arriving and create stories about why they were late.

The place suddenly looked more like a castle from fairy tales, than a haunted ruin from a novel and Arya realized that she was the princess in the story.

When Arya went to her room in the tower she found her evening gown, made of grey satin and black lace, with black gloves and fan already waiting for her. What she didn’t expected was to find a necklace made of black pearls and matching earrings.

“Oh my God!” Jeyne said in awe when she saw the pieces. “This is Lady Lyanna’s necklace! I had never seen it personally!”

“Where have you seen it then?” Arya asked as she touched the jewels.

“It’s the same she is wearing in the painting! The one in the gallery! Rumor has it she was wearing the pearls when she meat Lord Rhaegar! The Master must have fetched it for my lady to wear tonight!” Jeyne said with enthusiasm.

“Isn’t it too much? I mean…It’s a family jewel after all. I shouldn’t wear it.” Arya said stubbornly.

“Nonsense, my lady!” Jeyne insisted. “You are the only family the Master has left and the lady of the house. It was a gift from your grandsire anyway; a Stark relic.”

“I must thank Jon for it later.” She said absently as Jeyne helped her to get dressed. “Although I have no idea of how to do it.” Jeyne giggled at that.

“I know what my lady could do to thank Master Jon.” Jeyne said in a witty tone. “I bet Master Jon would love a sweet kiss from you, my lady.”

“Why do you say such a think?” Arya asked in distress, making Jeyne giggle once more.

“Oh, my lady…I wish a gentleman would look at me like Master Jon looks at you.” Jeyne said. “I didn’t mean to snoop, but…I saw the two of you the other day, sitting by the piano and playing music together. No one here has ever witnessed Master Jon playing music, except when his tutor was here and it has been years since it happened. If I dare say so…I think my lady would enjoy the kiss just as much.”

At that the final verses of the poem Jon had read to her came back to her mind as if they were printed in her soul.

_“I know I do not love thee! yet, alas!_

_Others will scarcely trust my candid heart;_

_And oft I catch them smiling as they pass,_

_Because they see me gazing where thou art.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now there's a date for Arya to give her answer and one way or another they will go to Winterfell. What could possibly go wrong? What will be Arya's answer?  
> I'm glad that you liked the poem I picked.  
> Review are always appreciated.


	6. Chapter 6

Arya took a deep breath before going down the stairs. The music filled the air inside the castle and for the first time there was life inside the place. She could hear the sound of laughs and conversation.

The reflection in the mirror showed more of the woman her mother and sister had dreamed that Arya would become one day, but not exactly what she had wished for herself. It wasn’t entirely bad to feel slightly pretty either, but that was the kind of thing she would have a hard time dealing with. She could only hope that it would be enough to make her common in the eyes of society and not an outcast like she had felt her entire life.

Once she reached the ballroom Arya couldn’t help feeling dazzled by the general splendor of it. The decoration, the shinny glasses and cutlery, the fine women in ball gowns with feathers and pearls…She had never been to an event like that.

Jon spotted her at the entrance almost immediately and came to her, a bit euphoric in his gestures, with a smile so full and bright that it made her feel warm inside. The music stopped and all heads turned to her with morbid curiosity. The debutant in grey and black, the tragic, scandalous and obscure orphan girl who was known as the Lady in the Red Keep.

“You look beautiful, sweet cousin.” Jon declared before kissing her hand in a way that made all the guests hold their breaths in shock. Arya felt her cheeks burning with embarrassment.

“Thank you…For everything.” She said shyly while touching the necklace with her gloved hand. For a second he seemed to hesitate, but then he smiled at her again.

“Come. The guests are anxious to meet you.” He said while offering her his arm for support.

Jon spent the following hour introducing her to all the guests, from tenants and local merchants to aristocracy. He would never fail to point that she was the lady in the Red Keep, and somehow attribute to her the role that was supposed to be performed by either his wife or Lord Rhaegar’s.

Arya had no idea if he was acting out of habit or just confidence about the answer she had promised him. For a second she was tempted to act out of childish stubbornness, but one wrong movement could cost her life a great deal.

She wasn’t a child anymore and her age could hardly be used as an excuse to ignore everything that was at stake with Jon’s proposal. More than that, she was walking on unknown ground in which concerned her feelings. Even at that very moment, while he joyously presented her to his friends and close acquaintances, she felt warm and unexplainably happy at the sight of his shy smile and gentle eyes.

Was it what poets and writers called love, or it was just a youthful infatuation? There surely were worst suitors in the world and Jon had a triumph in his hand. He had Winterfell. He could take her back to her home and allow her to keep the property and the title in her family, and although the idea of a marriage for convenience was disgusting to her, Arya couldn’t deny that her homesick heart would give anything to go back to her home.

As they walked together across the crowded ballroom, Arya noticed how the young women would look at him with as if Jon was a prize to be conquered and Arya was nothing but a nuisance to be dismissed with a shake of their gloved hands. He seemed oblivious to it, though.

Jeyne had mentioned that among the young ladies that were likely to be present in the dance, Lady Margaery Tyrell was by far the most desirable young woman in the county. She had a pretty face and beautiful eyes, her manners were gracious and she was known as an accomplished dancer, singer and drawer. Her family was wealthy and there was a general belief that Jon would eventually give in to her charms.

During all those months in the Red Keep Arya had never heard of that woman, though. The only feminine names she had heard Jon speaking of were his mother’s, eventually “cousin Sansa”, his former lover’s and Arya’s. Although she had the certainty of his proposal, once Arya was presented to Margaery Tyrell, she couldn’t help feeling insecure.

Lady Margaery was indeed beautiful like an angel and gracious like the small roses she wore in her hair.

“It is a pleasure to finally make your acquaintance, Lady Arya.” Magaery said with a gracious courtesy and a smile. “Jon has been hiding you from us for far too long. I was starting to believe you were some sort of invention of his mind.”

Arya couldn’t help noticing the intimacy in the way she referred to Jon by his first name, nor could she ignore the voice in her head that sounded just like Sansa’s telling her to hold her tongue. Arya repaid the courtesy and the smile.

“I am very real, as you can see.” Arya answered boldly. “I’m afraid he hasn’t mentioned you, but my cousin often gets distracted in his thoughts.” Jon blushed lightly at her answer and tried to muffle a laugh.

“I am indeed very mindless of these things. I often forget of things outside these walls.” He answered in obvious embarrassment. “I am the one to blame for keeping my dear cousin away from the world. I promise that it won’t happen again, Arya.” At the sound of Arya’s name, Lady Margaery smile faded away like a rose dying on the branch.

“You’ll be most welcome at Highgarden, Lady Arya. I’ll settle a date and we shall have a tea party. I’m sure mama and my brothers will be delighted to make your acquaintance.” Margaery said. “You’ll meet Loras here. He is escorting me tonight. Garlan just got engaged to Lady Leonette Fossoway. She is adorable.”

“It’s a pity that Willas couldn’t make it tonight. I would be delighted to share a glass of good scotch with him.” Jon pointed graciously.

“Oh his leg got the best of him this week, but when Lady Arya meets him Willas shall be as good as new, I’m sure.” Lady Margaery insisted.

“Well, he’ll have all winter to recover. I believe we will find him in good health once we are back.” Jon pointed.

“Back? Where are you going Jon? Tanking Lady Arya away before we have the chance to befriend such a lovely creature isn’t fair.” Lady Margaery said in obvious distress.

“Jon promised to take me to Winterfell with him. He has some business to attend there and he is thrilled with the idea of spending Christmas in the North, isn’t it true?” Arya replied.

“Indeed, and I was delighted to see how much you were happy about my plans.” Jon smiled at her lightly.

The musicians started to play a waltz and at that several couples went to the center of the room to dance. Jon looked at her shyly, ignoring the look of expectation in Margaerys eyes, as he offered Arya his gloved hand.

“Will you give me the honor of your first dance, cousin?” He asked gently and for a second she was relieved.

“I’ve already promised you that much, haven’t I?” Arya answered while taking his hand. “Excuse us, Lady Margaery.”

Arya allowed Jon to conduce her to the center of the room. His left hand rested at her waist as he positioned his body in front of her to lead the waltz elegantly. For a second Arya held her breath once she realized the proximity between them and the gentle warmth irradiating from his body. Jon looked at her with unusual confidence before giving the first step.

“Lady Margaery is unusually agitated today.” Jon pointed out as a matter of fact as he conducted her in the steps of the waltz.

“I assume she isn’t used to share your attention with other women.” Arya replied trying to not sound bitter. Jon smirked at that.

“I should expect that someone of the staff would tell you that much eventually.” He attempted a joke. “I’ve been frustrating her for two years now, but neither she nor her parents seem to understand that I’m not interested.”

“Why not? She is beautiful and no doubt she is a sophisticated lady.” Arya added.

“Well…She makes me nervous most of the time.” Jon said with a hint of humor. “Her brother is a good friend of mine, but Margaery and I never had much in common. Besides…I’ve already confessed my feelings for another woman, and I’m waiting for her to decide if she will have me or not.”

“This woman seems to be a cruel one.” Arya said in embarrassment. Jon nodded in denial.

“She has an honest heart and a resolute mind. I have been a fool in my first attempt of asking for her hand in marriage and with good reason she ran away from my affections.” He said while carefully bringing her body closer to his as they swayed to the sound of the music. “My beloved is a woman of rare qualities and she refused to run to the arms of a man that offered her a name and property instead of his heart. I offered her everything that I have, when I should have offered her everything that I am.”

“Do you think she will have you for her husband?” Arya asked as she felt her knees tremble.

“I can only hope for her to understand that if it’s passion what she desires from me…I’m ready to deliver her my burning heart.”

Before Arya could say anything the music stopped and all the guests clapped their hands enthusiastically. Soon another tune started and another gentleman came her way to ask for the privilege of a dance with her. As Jon had promised her, he never attempted to stop her of dancing with another man, but she could tell by the way he was looking at her that he wasn’t exactly comfortable with it.

Jon bowed his head lightly and greeted the man, who Arya assumed to be a close friend to her cousin. She didn’t pay him any especial attention, but his face was vaguely familiar.

“I never thought I would find you here, from all places.” The gentleman’s voice brought her back to reality. She hasn’t bothered to pay attention to his face or name until that moment, but the pale blond hair and striking purple eyes were indeed familiar. “It’s me, Lady Arya. Eddric Dayne, of Starfall.”

“Ned Dayne?” She asked astonished as they danced across the room. “By all the gods graces, what are you doing here?” He laughed lightly at it.

“I have business with, Jon…I mean, Lord Stark.” Edric answered courteously. “Lord Stark was informed that I was in town for a couple of days and was most gracious to invite me to such a lovely gathering. I could never decline an opportunity to meet you again, especially under such circumstances.”

“I had no idea that you and Jon were acquainted.” Arya answered feeling suddenly happy for being reunited with an old friend. “He hardly ever mentions anyone’s name. He just says that he has meat a friend in town and nothing more. I’m glad you are here, Ned.”

“I’m very sorry for your loss, my lady.” Ned Dayne said soberly. “I can imagine how dreadful the whole thing might have been to you. Taken away from your home like this, to a strange place and a life you’ve never known…Lord Stark is a good man, but the whole arrangement was far from ideal.”

“Jon is trying his best to deal with this whole mess.” Arya said. “I can’t say that I’m happy with it, but given the circumstances we are dealing with this new reality quite well.”

“I was in the North recently…This is absurd, but I can see why they are so worried about your well being.” Ned added with gravity. “As I said, Jon is a good and honorable man, but given the history between the Targaryens and the Starks, it’s understandable Mr. Poole’s worries about your wellbeing.”

“What are you talking about?” Arya asked while trying to keep a smile on her lips. “I’ve write Mr.  Poole a few times since I arrived. He was being terribly difficult accepting Jon as the new Lord, but the law is the law even if I don’t agree with it.”

“It’s not only about the testament and the succession to the title. Have you ever wondered why you never heard of your cousin before the testament?” Ned asked as the music slowed down. “Have you ever wondered why you never heard your father talking about Lady Lyanna? It was a scandal at the time!”

The music stopped and Edric bowed to her elegantly. Arya repaid the gesture even when her curiosity was screaming inside her head to know what Dayne was about to tell her. What was he talking about?

That didn’t make sense at all, but even if Arya wanted to know what Edric had to say about the mysterious lack of information on her cousin’s family, a dance was hardly the place to have such conversation.

She didn’t have the time to make questions, or to engage in any sort of conversation that wasn’t related to the general splendor of the party, or who dreadful the weather would be in the following months with winter upon them. Jon had been terribly efficient in keeping her busy with the guests and other unknown gentlemen that would inevitably ask for the pleasure of a dance, that she barely saw her old friend even from a distance.

The hours passed in vertiginous pace as Arya realized she was running out of time and soon Jon would demand an answer from her, but after what Ned Dayne had suggested…How could she even give her cousin an answer when an old and dark secret has been carefully kept away from her knowledge? If Jon had kept her ignorant for such a long time, there was certainly a reason for such a behavior and it couldn’t be a good one.

Her corset was probably too tight and after a couple of glasses of champagne Arya felt dizzy and light headed. The guests slowly left the Red Keep and she could even bet that she have heard Lady Margaery saying something like “the poor orphan won’t be here forever”.

That made her remember of her sister and how Sansa would probably think the same if she was in Lady Margaery’s place at that moment. Little knew her that Arya had already obtained what she had been fighting for over two years and that Jon’s proposal could actually mean something dangerous. He had offered Arya a crown and now she suspected that it was a poisoned one.

Once the last guest went away, she finally took a sit by the piano. Slowly she undid the sophisticated work that Jeyne have done in her hair, letting it fall over her shoulder. It didn’t take long for Jon to find her there, with a broad and confident smile on his face. The sight of him made her heart heavy and warm all at once, in a way that was confusing and overwhelming.

“I hope you have enjoyed yourself.” He said with genuine concern.

“Very much. I guess they will have a lot to talk about for months, from my half mourning clothes to the decoration, we shall be topic of universal conversation.” Arya replied while taking of her gloves nervously.

“Nothing new, than. You seemed quite familiar with Lord Dayne.” Jon pointed, finally bringing up a matter that was certainly bothering him to no end. She never took Jon for a jealous man, but Arya was fairly aware of his insecurities. They both had that in common.

“Ned Dayne is an old friend. We used to play together as children.” Arya said uncomfortably. “He seemed to be rather concerned about my wellbeing, especially after visiting the North. I don’t see why exactly he was so concerned about, but he brought up some questions I can’t avoid indefinitely.” Jon pleasant smiled died slowly in his lips as an expression of apprehension took its place.

“Ned is an old friend and I’m sure he wouldn’t suggest that I’m treating you in any improper way.” Jon said barely concealing his indignation. Arya sighed at it.

“No, he was rather convict of your honor and good character and brought it up more than once, but you and me have agreed in my first day here that taking me out of my house to an unknown life, to live under the same roof with a cousin that I’ve never heard of was quite unusual, if not cruel.” Arya replied firmly. “I won’t play the condescending one. You know me well enough to understand that I lack such refinements, so I must ask you. What is it that makes the servants at Winterfell so suspicious of you and so worried about my wellbeing? Why the name Targaryen has never been brought up inside my house and yet a Targaryen is my current protector? Why wouldn’t my father speak of his sister? Why we never knew of your existence?”

Jon closed his eyes and took a deep breath. In many ways, it seemed as if he had been rightfully slapped on his face.

“Most likely because my very existence was a source of shame to your family.” Jon answered bitterly. “My parents’ marriage didn’t happen in the highest grounds of morality. I was oblivious to this until I’ve meat your father when I was just a boy of four-and-ten. He was convinced that as Lyanna’s son I should at least be introduced to my mother’s family, but my father wouldn’t allow it. Not after all the bitterness between the two families.”

“What really happened?”Arya insisted. “Most of all, why did you omit it from me?”

“My mother was engaged to another man at the time.” Jon answered with evident embarrassment. “My father was still wearing black for the death of his first wife when he met her at some horse race in London. Depending on whom you ask about it, some will say that they ran away together and some will claim that my father kidnapped her and your family firmly believed in the second option. I was born only three months after their wedding so as you can guess there was plenty of scandal involved in the process. Some will even refer to me as ‘the bastard master’, but of course being my father’s sole heir and now Lord of Winterfell tends to make people more careful about mentioning it.” He took a deep breath while trying to keep calm. “As for omitting it from you…Since I’ve presented myself as a suitor to your hand, a lady of the very same family who treated my existence as a shameful scandal to be covered, I didn’t see how bringing up such a matter could help my cause.”

“And I don’t see why omitting it from me would either.” Arya replied bitterly. “Is this all? The scandalous marriage of your parents?”

“Well, I wouldn’t be surprised if some of the older tenants and servants started to debate if I would do the same to you.” Jon nearly roared. “I have acted wrong when I brought you here before visiting Winterfell and presenting myself to you. Obviously some are accusing me of kidnapping you to take some nefarious pleasure on hurting a woman with the Stark name. Even if law says that I am your legal guardian, I can’t prevent people of saying that I’m nothing but an envious bastard with a lust for an innocent young woman who by chance belongs to the same family that rejected me.”

“This is utterly ridiculous! How could anyone say such a thing without even knowing you?” Arya answered in outrage. Jon gave her a melancholic grin before a proper answer.

“Isn’t exactly what Dayne suggested? He might trust my character and honor, but he couldn’t ignore the potential damage to your reputation… Especially not when I’ve just made my feelings for you so pathetically obvious for the world to see. Lord Dayne is just the kind of nobleman that anyone would consider ideal to you. Irreproachable reputation, title, land, money and looks…I thought I had enough to at least put a distance between the image you have of me and my family’s scandalous past, but you have every right to decline my proposal after knowing this.”

“I don’t care about what Ned Dayne thinks to be dangerous or not to my reputation. I also don’t care about what sort of man others think to be ideal to me. I do care about the man that stands in front of me, convinced that I’ll judge him based on others’ mistakes, though. I am gravely offended by your behavior, thinking that I would turn my back at you because of something that happened before we were born.” Arya answered sharply. “You should have told me though, instead of allowing me to enter society by your side, completely oblivious to what sort of nasty gossip this would raise. I was at least entitled to knowledge. I had the right to know about what sort of life was waiting for me here.”

“I am sorry.” Jon muttered sadly.

“You should be.” Arya snapped back. “It’s done, though. There’s no way back, only the path ahead.”

“If so you want, I’ll make arrangements for you to remain at Winterfell. You can live your life as you see fit and I’ll have no objections to it.” Jon said, devastated by her answer.

“Remain at Winterfell? Alone?” Arya asked back outraged. “Have you heard a word of what I’ve just said?”

“I understand that you are gravelly offended by my behavior and for depriving you of knowledge about what sort of scandals you could get involved with.” Jon answered.

“Yes, I am angry with you for doing this. I also told you, though, that I do not care about what others think about me or my reputation, but I do care about you.” She said furiously. “I also care about how this can affect your duties as Lord of Winterfell and I do not want either you or those who depend on your success to suffer! I won’t stay at Winterfell unless you are ready to stay there with me. I won’t allow you to cast me out of your life for fear over what others might think about how what we have started. You offered me a name, a title and a home. Then you offered me companionship and acceptance. Only a few hours ago you offered me passion and your burning heart. Well now I hope…No! I demand you to have the courage to live up to your promises, because I will marry you, Jon!”

For a long second there was nothing but heavy silence between them as they stared at each other. Jon’s face was taken by an expression of surprise, and then slowly turned into disbelief and joy as he walked toward her to embrace Arya tightly, before claiming her mouth in a kiss filled with promised passion.

 

  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now that was a difficult chapter to write. I hope you like it.  
> Reviews, as usual, are most welcome.


	7. Chapter 7

At first she didn’t know what to do, as his arm kept her body close to his and his left hand held her by the nape, with his thumb eventually caressing her jaw and ear as his mouth molded hers in a kiss. It felt wicked, sudden, and to a certain length even violent. Until that very moment the concept of a kiss had been something she vaguely recognized from novels and poems; and it had little to do with the reality of the act. 

Arya had expected it to feel like some sort of divine revelation, as if the clouds would suddenly disappear to allow the light to shine upon her one true love. Reality was far less poetic as they stood in an empty ballroom, still bearing signs of the end of great festivities. Both of them looking worn out and exhausted, both still angry with the previous argument, and yet…It felt powerful like two mighty forces of nature colliding and intimate beyond description. 

In books kisses were described as sweet, gentle and shy, while what she felt was the opposite of it. Jon tasted of wine, scotch and a faint hint of tobacco. His beard tickled her skin and his hands were strong and rough even when he was obviously trying to be gentle with her. Most of all there was nothing shy about the way his tongue forced the path between her lips to taste her in a wicked and indecent way that made Arya feel as if her clothes and even her skin were keeping her from experiencing that violent sensation fully. 

Slowly her body relaxed and as her resistances went down Jon made the kiss more tender than voracious. Arya embraced him trying to get her balance and also out of boldness. As Jon tightened his arms around her and allowed her to feel his body pressed against her, strong and lean in its building, Arya couldn’t help feeling protected or the sense of belonging that his kiss brought to her. 

There was something devious and also oddly soothing in his kiss. He was the one to break the kiss and when he did Jon looked into her eyes and caressed her face gently with his left hand as his right arm still kept her close. He was smiling and it wasn’t a shy smile or a vain one. He seemed genuinely happy and it made Arya feel welcome in his life and secure within his arms. 

“I wish I could take you North right now…” He whispered in a tender way. “And marry you in a small stone chapel on the way and tell to the world how happy you’ve made me.” 

Arya caressed his face back, still uncomfortable with the sudden displays of affection, but no less moved by Jon’s gestures. 

“I never thought you would be that happy about my answer.” She said carefully. “You sounded so…Mechanic and distant when you first asked me.” 

“I was an idiot to think that reason and pragmatism were all that mattered.” He said. “My life was dull and lonely until you came in. Even under such drastic conditions…You changed me, Arya. You gave me reason to sing and smile when once I had none.” To that she had no answer. What could she say about it? That she was in love with him? That was probably right, but she wasn’t enthusiastic about that marriage. She wouldn’t mind another kiss, though. 

“I feel so tired. Can we talk the details once we are both rested? I guess I won’t make sense without few hours of sleep.” Arya said while still feeling a bit dizzy. 

“Of course. You must be exhausted.” Jon agreed before releasing her from his arms. “Sleep well.” He said before kissing her forehead. 

Arya nod and bid him goodnight before going to her room. Once she found herself alone inside the place she tried to calm down her heart and breath. The memory of that kiss could still make her skin burn and for a wild child like Arya Stark, all those feelings were foreign and frightening to a certain degree, and that was exactly what thrilled her. 

She changed her clothes and though about everything they had said, especially about the scandal involving his mother and Lord Rhaegar. What sort of man was Jon’s father after all? He sounded like a ghost or a curse. Never physically present, but Arya felt as if he was still there, dragging chains inside that castle and inside Jon’s head. 

Lord Rhaegar was about to become her father-in-law and yet Arya knew nothing about him or what he thought of his son’s choice of a bride. The idea of such a passionate man naturally aroused her curiosity and as she laid on her bed Arya couldn’t stop thinking and wondering if Lord Rhaegar Targaryen was a passionate hero, rescuing his beloved from a loveless marriage, or if he was indeed a villain who cruelly kidnapped and raped her aunt. 

Given to Jon’s reaction, to ask him about details would be a delicate thing to do. He seemed genuinely embarrassed and conflicted with both rumors. Arya even doubted that he knew enough to give her an impartial narrative. After that night, she guessed even the name of Edric Dayne would become an issue, although she firmly believed that Ned had told her about his fears out of a protective feeling toward an old friend. 

Arya looked one more time to the necklace and earrings that have belonged to her aunt and bared such a heavy meaning. As Jeyne had said it was only fair for Arya to have them, along with Winterfel…Jon would take her home soon and she would be Lady Stark of Winterfell, like her mother before her. That would put an end to endless suspicions and nasty gossips and in time they would find happiness in that arrangement, or so she hoped. 

Sleep came to her with mighty force. Arya was exhausted, and yet her mind was still agitated. She wouldn’t stop dreaming of riding horses across a vast field and bathing naked in the hot springs near the heart tree at Winterfell. In her dreams Jon was peeping at her, while hiding behind a bush until she shouted at him to join her and so he did with evident embarrassment. 

In her dreams she should have blushed at the sight of his body, even if he was still wearing trousers. Arya didn’t mind, though. She teased him and splashed water until his hair was soaked and he was smiling fully. He held her in his arms and kissed her until their nakedness became something natural as they kissed and touched each other. 

She felt his fingers brushing her cheek and the closeness of his breath, gently caressing her bare skin while he smiled. Such a vivid dream that was…She looked up to the sky and saw it turning dark grey with heavy stormy clouds.  

 _Lyanna_ _…_  

A strange voice called in a ghostly way. It felt like a bad omen. 

 _Lyanna_ _…Wake up!_  

It was soft and rich like honey, but no less frightening. 

 _Lyanna_ _…Wake up!_  

She could smell the exotic blue roses. 

Something hurt her hands, like needle pricks. It felt too real to be a dream, just like the brush of fingers on her cheek and the darkness casted by a heavy cloud. 

A distant thunder, or maybe something shattering, called for her attention and Arya woke up in a startle just in time to see a vulture running out of her room. 

She looked around her and saw all the blue roses that once rested in a vase by the window, spread all around her like a morbid garland, while the vase made of fine Chinese porcelain was shattered on the floor. Arya looked at her hands; all bloody because of the cuts made by the roses’ thorns. 

A wave of panic took her all of a sudden. Was it a ghost? Was it Lyanna’s ghost cursing her somehow? It couldn’t be. A ghost wouldn’t run like that. There was someone hiding in the castle and Arya could bet her eyes that if there was indeed a stranger hiding inside the Red Keep and playing nasty pranks on her, then the west wing was the most likely place for that person to choose as a hiding spot. 

Sansa would have said for her to remain in her room and call for help. It was probably a good thing to do, the reasonable thing to do, but Arya wouldn’t wait for servants or even Jon to rescue her. If anything he would try to stop her of going into the west wing for some reason she couldn’t understand. 

She got out of bed in a hurry and grabbed her horsewhip, barely remembering of putting on her night robe for the sake of decency, but before she could even walk out of the room Jon was already at her door, blocking her way out. 

Arya looked at him in shock and anger as he held her by her arms. 

“What happened here?” He asked soberly. “I heard a noise.” 

“Someone entered my room and broke the vase.” Arya answered. “I don’t care about what you say. There’s someone hiding inside this damn place. In the west wing to be more specific and I’ll put an end to this nonsense!” 

“No, you won’t!” Jon replied sharply. “I’ve told you! There’s nothing there for you see!” 

“Then why do I have this feeling that you are lying to me?!” She lashed back. “I’ve seen someone walking that way before and every time I mention it you try to convince me that the place is dangerous and doomed somehow! I’m not a fool, Jon!” 

“I never said you were.” He answered and by the sight of his pale face Arya could tell he was terrified of what she could do. “Trust me, Arya! Forget the west wing! We will be out of here by tomorrow. I can change our tickets for tonight, if you want me to. We will be at Winterfell in no time and all this notions will be behind us!” 

“There is something there! Something you don’t want me to see!” She accused him sharply. “What is it now? Your dead mother’s body?! Or maybe the body of your former lover that you killed in a fit of anger once she rejected you?!” 

“Don’t be absurd.” He said plainly. “There’s nothing there.” 

“Perhaps another secret that you consider to be to shameful to share with the woman you want for your wife!” Arya accused him. “Why don’t you trust me for a change?!” 

“Why are you so cruel?” He questioned her back. “I wish for nothing but to protect you from an ugly reality. I am nothing but this man you see. A damned creature tied to this God forsaken place where I never knew any sort of happiness until you arrived.” 

“Don’t make me the villain of this story.” She insisted, while holding the whip tighter. “I am not the one keeping secrets here. Someone entered my room, broke a vase and laid the flowers around me while I was sleeping as if I were dead! What else could have happened?! What is it that you are hiding?!” 

“If you insist so much…I’ll show you the damn curse I carry with me.” He grabbed her by the wrist. 

Arya was suddenly shocked by his display of anger and frustration as he dragged her all the way through the empty hallways and locked rooms. Jon didn't dare to say a word to her about what he was hiding. 

Even if she had been deadly curious about the mystery of the west wing, Arya could barely look at the place as Jon carried all the way up the stairs. Nothing there indicated decadency, or the ugly and nasty effect of time. It was all clean and perfectly organized, like a whole and independent residence. 

A door was open and an old man with a long beard showed up. His pale face was petrified with fear as he bowed before Jon like an obedient servant. 

"I'm sorry, my lord." The old man's voice cracked as his hands trembled. "I thought a light sedative would be enough to keep things under control." 

"Your sedative obviously failed, Pycelle." Jon snapped back in a way that was very much unlike him. His voice was cold and imperious like the one of a tyrant. "Not only that, but also you allowed him to get out of his chambers! Do you have any idea of what might have happened?!" 

"I'm sorry, my lord!" The old man bowed his head out of fear. "It won't happen again." 

"Of course it won't! Both of you will be out of my sight as soon by tomorrow!" Jon nearly roared at the old man in a way that Arya actually feared what he might do out of rage. 

"Why are you acting like this?!" Arya asked while trying to release her wrist from his grip. 

Jon looked at her and for a brief moment his eyes bared the same kindness and warmth she grew used to. He seemed to be heartbroken to some degree. 

"I wish there was any way of you not to think low of me in this. I wish there was something I could do to avoid this nasty business, but now I have no choice in this matter." His voice was sober and bared a sense of doom she could not ignore. "If you are to be my wife, than you must know the truth about this family!" 

"I do not encourage you to enter the room, my lord. He is quite agitated. It could be dangerous." Pycelle insisted diligently. 

"I doubt he could do any more harm than he already has." Jon's voice was bitter and dark with rage. Pycelle eventually gave in and allowed him to enter the chamber without saying a word. 

Jon once more dragged her inside the chambers and Arya could barely ignore the state of the place. There were broken objects all around and some walls had been  burned. Once he opened the door, a bedchamber was reveled and inside the place a handsome man in his fifties, with long silver hair and purple eyes looked at them. 

His regal face seemed a bit shock at the sight  Jon's furious expression as her fiancée stood in front of her like a shield. Arya could barely understand who was that man, but given Jon's expression their relationship wasn't exactly a good one. 

"Haven't I told you before? You are not supposed to leave this room, father." Jon said with authority in his tone. Something Arya hasn't seen so far. 

"Music." Was the only thing the man Arya understood to be Rhaegar said. "I heard music." 

"Yes. There was music downstairs, but you were not suppose to get out of here." Jon insisted. 

"I was worried." He said vaguely. His voice sounded as if he wasn't entirely alert. 

"Worried about what?" Jon asked as if he was talking to a stubborn child. 

"Lyanna wouldn't wake." He said. "I gave her flower. She likes flowers." 

"Mother is dead, father." Jon answered him sourly. "I killed her, remember? In childbirth. Just like you've always said." At such a harsh truth Rhaegars eyes were filled with tears as his face turned into a mask of grief. 

"What happened to him?" Arya finally asked. "Why are you being so cruel?" 

Jon said nothing for a while. He simply lowered his gaze and while still preventing Rhaegar to see her. 

"It's better for you to get out of the room now." Jon said calmly. "I'll explain everything." 

He might have seen her, or just got curious by the sound of her voice, but the fact is that as soon as Rhaegar's attention was captured by her Arya saw that strange man go from sorrow to excitement and then rage. 

"LIAR!" He roared at Jon. "She is alive! You are keeping her for yourself!" He walked toward Jon with anger as he tried to get his son out of the way so he could see Arya. "LYANNA! LYANNA! LYANNA!" He screamed. 

"Get out, Arya! NOW!" Jon commanded as he tried to control Rhaegar's fit of anger. 

And so she did. Arya ran away from the room as she listened to Rhaegar's maddening screams. Pycelle entered the room carrying a briefcase full of potions and medicines to put the mad man down while Jon tried to immobilize him. 

Arya ran back to her room and started to get her belongings inside an old bag as soon as she could, along with some money she had managed to save since her arrival at the Red Keep. 

That was the end for her. That castle was a mad house and Jon had been lying to her all the time. She had thought of Rhaegar as an hexcentric man that spent his days travelling around the world while his son managed the state. She had thought of Jon as a lonely man that grew up with the burden of taking care of his father's business from a tender age. She had thought...She had thought that Jon was a kind man, but now it was plain enough for her see that he was nothing but a cruel creature that kept his own father locked away in a half destroyed room. 

Arya was terrified of what she had seen and disgusted with all the lies he had been telling her. At that point it was impossible for her to tell the truth from the lie in all of Jon's stories. Was that his revenge over what Rhaegar had done to his former lover? Or was it the ultimate display of the true nature of an ambitious man that had craved for power and money all along? 

Was it really true that Arya had no money and no titles to her name or that wedding proposal was Jon's plan to usurp everything from her and then lock her away just like he did to his father? 

Ned Dayne was right to warn her about that strange arrangement. Arya simply couldn't stand the idea of staying inside that castle for another second. She changed her clothes and grabbed her things while the servants were busy helping Jon and Pycelle to contain Rhaegar's fit on the other side of the castle. 

Arya took that opportunity to ran straight to the stables. She saddled her horse and mounted it without a second thought.   

  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It took me forever to write this one, but I finally found my muse again. So...Jon has some skeletons inside the closed and Arya isn't so sure of his good intentions anymore.  
> I hope you'll like it and reviews are appreciated.


	8. Chapter 8

She put the horse to test as she rode as fast as possible. The mighty silhouette of the Red Keep slowly faded in the horizon. Arya didn't know what to do, or where to go as the sunrise painted the sky breaking the dense darkness of night. 

Arya wanted to go home. She wanted the safety of Winterfell and it's grey walls. She wanted her family and the warm laugh of her siblings. She wanted to fell safe and loved, but she was no one now. Her name was Arya, but to say that she was a Stark meant little to nothing. Her name and everything that it meant had been passed over to Jon, along with her home and everything inside it. 

Her only living family member was Sansa and if Arya knew her sister at all Lady Aryn would try to marry her off to anyone with a good name and a title or money, if not both. Sansa might even insist on sending her back to Jon, even after all the horrors she had witnessed. 

To say that Arya was terrified of what she had seen inside that room was an understatement. That cruel man keeping his father locked up and sedated had nothing to do with the shy and kind cousin she had been introduced on her first day. And Rhaegar...She had no idea of what had happened to him, but he was clearly a tormented mind and all those medicines might have led him to see his dead wife in Arya's face. 

If Jon was capable of such atrocities, what would he do to her once she was no longer needed or if she proved to be a nuisance? Would she lock her up? Would he sedate her and say to the world that she was a mad woman? 

Arya started to cry without noticing. How could she think even for a moment, that Jon's proposal had anything to do with love? She had the right name and money, but as an unwedded woman she couldn't even administrate her own income aside from the money he had given to her every month. Jon controlled everything and if one day she decided to marry another man he would no longer have access to that money. 

She went straight to the village and the only thing she could think about was to avoid passing by the Tarly's. Sam was sure to communicate Jon of her whereabouts and even more likely to prevent her of getting away. 

Arya hoped that Ned Dayne would still be in town. The Lord of Starfall was an old friend and he had been the one to warn her about the unusual manners in which Jon was behaving. Even if Ned insisted that Jon was an honorable man, she doubted that Dayne knew anything about Rhaegar's true condition. 

King's Landing had a presumptuous name, but in fact it was nothing but a small village by the sea. The legends said that the first Saxons had landed there to raid the shore and nobody in the region was really interested in saying otherwise. There was an inn near the train station and since Ned Dayne had no connections in that part of the country, Arya presumed he would be there. 

She knocked at the door of the Inn at The Crossroad and was promptly received by a fat lady wearing an apron. The woman obviously knew who she was. The Lady of the Red Keep had been a topic of universal conversation since her arrival, but so far only few had laid eyes on her. 

The woman allowed her inside and conducted Arya to a small parlor where she could have a cup of tea and wait for Lord Dayne to wake. 

Waiting wasn't in her best interests, but Arya doubted she would have any other friend able to help her to get as far as possible from the Red Keep and Jon. 

She would look through the window from time to time just to make sure no one was approaching the inn searching for her. To Arya's great relieve, Ned didn't take long to show up. 

"Lady Arya...What? What happened? Is there something wrong? You seem distressed." He said. Given his clothes, Arya doubted he had slept at all after the ball. 

"I'm sorry to come here in such a hurry, but I didn't know what to do." She said in obvious anxiety. "I need your help Ned. I need to get out of here as soon as possible." 

"Did Jon behave improperly? Has he done something to you? What happened?" Ned asked as he took a sit in front of her. 

"So much happened that I can barely put in words. I just need a safe place to go." Arya insisted as she got even more distressed. 

"I can't take you away like this. Jon is your legal guardian and it would ruin your reputation." Ned said immediately. "I could escort you back to Winterfell or even to your sister's home, but other than that I don't know what else I could do to help." 

"Jon is Lord of Winterfell and I doubt my sister would help me." Arya said desolated. 

"If you tell me what happened, maybe I can think of a way to help you." Ned insisted while trying to sound as calm and gentle as possible. 

"I...I accepted Jon's proposal." Arya finally said. In a way it felt like something that had happened in another life to a different person. The memory of the kiss even made her hesitate for a second. 

"Have you been forced or coerced to do it?" Ned asked cautiously. Arya denied it with a gesture of her head. 

"No. Jon...He has been very careful and cautious about it." She said. "The problem is...He had lied to me, in many ways. I don't know way he would do that, but he did. I didn't knew about the scandal involving his birth as I had no idea of..." She paused suddenly. 

"Of what?" Ned insisted. 

"Rhaegar." Arya said vaguely. 

"Lord Rhaegar hasn't be seen in years here. Since Jon's return, I think." Ned pointed. "Some say he is ill and is being treated abroad, but no one really knows where." 

"He is ill, or so I think, but he isn't abroad." Arya said exasperated. "Jon keeps him locked and sedated in a room inside the castle. At first I thought I've seen a ghost roaming the halls. I knew there was something wrong about the west wing. Jon would never allow me to go there, until last night. I...I've seen him. Lord Rhaegar. He is..." Arya couldn't bring herself to say the words. 

"Mad?" Ned asked as a matter of fact. 

"Yes." Arya agreed. "Did you know about it too?" She felt suddenly suspicious. 

"I didn't know it for sure, but I suspected it. It would hardly be the first case in the Targaryen family." Ned pointed. "Lord Aerys, Rhaegar's father, he was well known for it. A reclusive and violent man. Suspicious of everything around him. Terrible things happened inside the castle in his time. I had no idea that Lord Rhaegar was being kept inside the house, though." 

"He tried to attack me. He entered my room and called me Lyanna. Jon gives him sedatives and locks him up! He had been lying to me all the time and I accepted to marry such a man!" Arya insisted. "I don't want to go back! At this point I can't even believe he cares about me. I can only think that Jon's sole ambition was to have control over my money and then name me mad!" 

Ned held her gently by her arms in an attempt to keep her calm. Arya was truly desperate as all the terrible possibilities passed by her mind like a turbulent river. 

"It doesn't sound at all as the man I know, my lady." Ned said in a very calm tone. "Although I can agree that Jon has been acting strangely in which concerns your guardianship, I don't see why he would go through such a plot in order to rob you of your money. He is incredibly rich, even without your father's inheritance. Rickard Stark died before changing his will, so Lady Lyanna inherited a generous amount that was transmitted to her son. That alone would make him a rich man. He already has the land and the tittle that alone worth more than your share of the inheritance." 

"Are you trying to convince me that everything he has done is something ordinary?" Arya questioned out of shock. 

"No. I don't think it is and you have every right to be afraid and question the conduct of a man that for all intends and purposes you agreed to marry." Ned said calmly. "I won't send you back to the castle. I'll take you to your sister and I'll help you to check the legality of your father's will. If there's anything we can do to claim back Winterfell or even to suspend his guardianship so you can control your money." 

"My sister is in London for the season. If I'm to go to Sansa, than I must go now. I don't want to stay here any longer risking to face Jon again. He is still my legal guardian. He could stop me if so he wanted." Arya said still finding it hard to stay calm. 

"I agree. I'm doing it out of friendship and respect to you, under risk of being labeled a criminal. I believe there is a reasonable explanation to all of this, but right now I'm only concerned with your wellbeing." Ned said. "Your sister will be able to shelter you without damaging your reputation while I look into the legal matters."  

Arya wasn't much thrilled with his plan, but Ned Dayne was right about the risks. Jon could go to the police and name him a criminal for kidnapping her or attempted against her honor. At least Sansa could keep this allegations at bay  and even try to dissuade Jon of taking Arya back since she was her only leaving sibling. 

"I'll just pick my things and we will go straight to the train station, but it would be for the best if you changed your clothes into something different. At this time half of the city is aware that Lady Stark is in the village and they will be able to tell Jon were you are." 

"What do you suggest?" Arya asked tiredly. 

"Do you remember when you dressed in Bran's clothes and passed as a boy?" He asked kindly. "It might still work if we don't stay here long enough for them to look twice at you." 

Ned didn't have to say another word for her to do as he said. He found her some male clothes that might have been used by a stable boy. She hidden her hair under a worn out hat and tried to disguise her breasts to make her chest flat. 

Once Ned was finished, he payed his bill and instructed her to enter a coach he had hired to carry his luggage. Arya did as he said and soon they were at the train station. 

Ned bought her something to eat before he could buy the tickets. The next train would only arrive in a couple of hours so they would have to wait in the station a while longer. Arya sat at a bench in the platform and pretended to read the newspaper. Ned found her there, with her nose buried between the pages so nobody would pay attention to her long enough to figure she was a girl. 

Dayne sat by her side for a while without saying a thing. He seemed, if anything else, uncomfortable to be in such position.  

"Any note yet?" He asked as a matter of fact. 

"What?" Arya questioned out of confusion. 

"Announcing the engagement. I thought...I thought the ball was to announce it, but Jon never said a word about getting married." Ned pointed awkwardly. "He seemed agitated, though. He wouldn't stop looking at you, even from a distance." 

"I hadn't given him my answer at the time." Arya replied briefly. "I said I would give him my answer after the ball." 

"I can't say that I'm not jealous." Ned sighed. "I came here not only because of my business, but also because of I had...I had considered the possibility of proposing to you. I would have done so if..." 

"If what?" Arya was divided between curiosity and shock. 

"When I arrived here everybody was talking about the new Lady of the Red Keep. They said Master Jon was buying lavishing clothes and throwing a ball to please you. You have been seen walking with him and I bet everyone thought it to be a lovely couple." Dayne said shyly. "I was convinced then that I didn't stand a chance against him, especially because of the tittle and the promises of taking you back to Winterfell. Now I can't help wondering what your answer might have been." 

"I would ask you the same thing I asked him. Why?" Arya snapped back. "I'm not some pretty lady that can barely wait to be proposed and spend the days dreaming of a prince. I have no money, no title to my name, no property and I'm not even pretty to make this arrangement vaguely appealing." 

"I beg to differ, my lady." Ned smiled at her in a way that reminded her of Jon and for that Arya cursed her very existence. "I've always liked you and enjoyed your company. You might not have the control over your money right now, but you are not a pauper. Besides...I find you to be very pretty indeed, so...At least for me this arrangement sounds really appealing." 

"You are sweet and a good friend, Ned." Arya said feeling suddenly sad again. 

"That's a very kind way to reject a suitor." He concluded with evident melancholy, but not even one drop of surprise. "Don't worry. My assistance doesn't come with strings attached." 

"I'm pleased to know. I wouldn't bare another disappointment in one day." Arya replied in a bittersweet tone. "Here I thought I would be heading home soon. I...I don't even know if I have a home now." 

"I'm sure you'll figure things out in time." Ned tried to sound positive, but he was well aware of the risks. "May I ask you a question?" 

"Yes, you may." Arya allowed even if she already knew what Ned would ask. 

"Why did you accept Jon's proposal if you are not particularly inclined to marriage? Do you...Do you have feelings for him?" 

Arya found herself without words for a second and it was inevitable to think about the poem Jon had read to her that night in the kitchen. It was impossible to avoid thinking of the touch of his hands and the kiss shared in an empty ballroom. _I do not love thee and yet..._  

"As you said, it was convenient and practical since I was already under his guardianship. He gave me all the practical reasons why it sounded like the right thing to be done. It's not that I was interested in money or anything of the sort, but the perspective of going home was hard to resist. I cared for him, though. He was nice to me when he wasn't telling me lies. Even Sansa insisted that I should consider him as a suitor. Under normal circumstances I would do the opposite of anything my sister said, but my position was too vulnerable and Jon...He didn't seem so bad. I mean...I liked his company and living with him was better than I expected. We had many interests in common and I'm not like my sister, who could have had any man she wanted. I'm plain old Arya Stark and I couldn't see the perspective of any other suitor in my future. At least none that could provide me some security." 

"I've always thought we had common interests and I could provide you all the financial and social security you might need. I enjoy your company and I doubt Lady Sansa would consider me an inferior suitor to the hand of her sister. Yet, you rejected the simple suggestion of such union, but when you talk about him you sound as if you were heartbroken." 

"You are kind and I like you as a good friend. Maybe one day I might think of this proposal differently, but I guess you wouldn't wait for me to make up my mind. As for my broken heart...How would you feel after being attacked? How would you feel after finding out that your guardian and the person you accepted to marry had been lying about a great number of things and you don't know why? How would you feel after realizing that the next mad creature locked up inside a room could be you? It's not only about shared interests, company and affection. It's not even about love. Anyone who brakes my trust is doing it at the risk of breaking my heart. I could never love a man that I can't trust. That's why I can't love him. I can't possibly give my heart to someone I can't give my trust." 

"I admire your fiber and strength of conviction, my lady. Even if I find my pride bruised by your rejection." Ned Dayne answered in a bittersweet way, even if he was trying to sound as pleasant and gentle as always. "I might still wait for you to change your mind about my proposal, though.  I firmly believe that some causes are worthy of our time and patience, especially when in which concerns the matters of the heart." 

Arya didn't know what else she could say to Ned Dayne, but she was perfectly aware that from that moment on she would be walking on thin ice. 

His friendship was something she valued dearly and Arya would never forget how he was trying to help her at the expenses of his good name and reputation, under risk of being named a criminal if Jon ever found out about Ned's participation in her escape. Love was something she didn't have to offer him, though. 

Ned must have sensed her discomfort with the topic since he didn't bring it up again. The hours passed in relative tranquility, although Arya wouldn't stop looking over her shoulders just to make sure that Jon wasn't there until the smoke of the train filled the platform like a dense fog. 

She entered the train feeling her heart heavy and the knees trembling. For a moment Arya felt as if she was no one, just a shadow, a spirit roaming the country in search of a place she could call home and her own identity. The Lady of Red Keep, Lady Stark of Winterfell, Lady Aryn's sister, Lord Dayne's friend, Lord Stark's running bride...She just wanted to be Arya and nothing more. 

With a hint of sadness she realized she would miss some aspects of her life in the Red Keep. She would miss the friends she have made, such as Jayne and Harwin. Eve if she hated to admit it she would also miss Jon and his company. Arya couldn't help thinking if any of the feelings he clamed to have for her were real. 

Arya took away her hat once she was inside the first class cabin. Maybe later she would change her clothes back, but at least until the train was in movement she would keep the Ned's. 

The train started to move and Ned got his attentions on the newspaper while Arya looked through the window just in time to see a desperate man emerging from the smoking platform. She would have recognized that silhouette anywhere and it was too late for her to hide back inside the cabin without being seeing by him. 

The train was gaining speed as he starter to run toward it with despair, demanding it to stop and calling her name until he gave up. She didn't say a word. She couldn't. Arya just stayed there looking at his face of tragedy as he disappeared in a foggy horizon.  

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Who is the villain and who is the hero in this? Arya is confused by what she witnessed inside the Red Keep and she isn't willing to share her life with someone who lies to her about so many important things.  
> I hope you'll like it and reviews are appreciated .


	9. Chapter 9

When they arrived at King's Cross Station, Ned pointed that there was a great number of police officers in the platform. Arya could only think that Jon must have gone to the police and presented charges against Edric Dayne. 

She kept the male clothes and tried to rub some coal over her face so the police would mistake her for an ordinary worker. Dayne agreed that they should get down from the train separated so they would have a better chance of passing the officers. 

Lord Dayne was stopped immediately as Arya passed the police force unnoticed. She observed from a distance Ned talking his way out of trouble, since he wasn't in company of a young woman that happened to be Lord Stark's protégée. 

Arya ran to the exit of the station and used some of her money to rent a cart to take her to her sister's house at Piccadilly. Obviously her dirty face and male clothes didn't buy much respect from the driver, but after paying an extra penny for her ride Arya finally found herself on the way to security. 

Sansa lived in a fine mansion in a very exclusive district in London. Among her close circle of friends and acquaintances there were at least one Duchess, two Countesses and several Baronesses. Lady Aryn was well known as a queen of London's society, just like Lady Catelyn Stark had been. 

Arya arrived at the mansion and knocked the door in a hurry. She was received by Sansa's sour butler that though her to be a bagger boy recently kicked out of some factory. Only after she let her hair to fall lose over her back and shoulders, the butler agreed to inform of her arrival to the lady of the house. 

Arya was taken to her sister's fancy sitting room. It didn't take long for Sansa to enter the room, wearing an elegant pale blue dress that made her blue eyes even more remarkable. Her sister walked with the grace of a swan and the propriety of a queen even when her face didn't fail to show her reproach. 

"What are you doing here?! I can't believe it's you!" Sansa said without much refinement. 

"I didn't know where else I could go. I'm so happy to see you!" Arya said with genuine happiness. 

"I hope none of my neighbors have seen you wearing this!" Sansa said. "Will you explain me the reason behind your clothes?" 

"It was needed. I wouldn't have come this far if I were recognized half way." Arya said. 

"I presume you are here without Lord Stark's approval." Sansa said with obvious anger. "What are you doing here, Arya? You better have a pretty good explanation to your savage actions." 

"I knew coming to you was a terrible idea, but you are the only family I have right now. I'm not going back to the Red Keep, not after what I've seen there." Arya insisted fiercely. 

"I'm sure the story behind your sudden visit must be fascinating and you'll be able to tell me everything about it once you have taken a bath. I'm sure I'll find something for you to wear. You can stay here until we figure out what to do with you." Sansa said while trying to keep her positive smile on her face. "I'll have a room prepared for you. I'm sure Harry will like to know we have an unannounced visitor." 

"What about my niece? Will you let me see Cat?" Arya asked sourly. 

"Of course I will, once you are clean and properly dressed. Cat will love to have her aunt here." 

Sansa conducted her to one of the many rooms inside the house and had a bath prepared in a few minutes. 

As Arya soaked inside the bathtub she couldn't help thinking about Ned and who her actions would affect her friend. Of course she knew that Jon could present charges, but there was a part of her the held on her hope of Jon being a decent man. He had promised her several times that she was free to find someone else if so she wanted only to put the whole police to chase her and Ned Dayne. 

It was only a matter of time until Jon found her and at that point Arya was sure that she would no longer have any money at her disposal. 

Her only hope was Sansa's protection at least until Dayne could check the legal value of her father's will. Arya's sole hope relied on the possibility and breaking the guardianship and gaining full control of her income. 

Once she was clean and properly dressed Arya went straight to her sister, who was sitting with her daughter playing on her lap. 

"She is so lovely." Arya said with a genuine smile on her lips.  

"Indeed. If only she wouldn't cry so often." Sansa pointed. "Please, have a sit and tell me why you thought it to be necessary to run away disguised as a man." 

Arya took a sit and once more explained the reasons that forced her to leave the Red Keep. All the fear and the feeling of betrayal that led her to the stables and how Jon have behaved poorly. Arya fought back her own tears as she remembered the moment Jon ran into the platform calling her name and demanding someone to stop the train. 

She omitted the part in which Jon had proposed to her and she had accepted. Arya was painfully aware that this piece alone would be enough for Sansa to send her back immediately to Lord Stark without a second thought to Arya's security and wellbeing. 

Lady Aryn didn't say a word as Arya explained how she found out that Rhaegar had been taken by a mental illness and how she had been attacked by him. She also told her sister of her fears about becoming the next prisoner of that castle. If Sansa believed her or not Arya couldn't tell. 

"I can't say that I like the idea of the tittle and state being passed over to this obscure man we never knew of." Sansa pointed before handling Cat to Arya so they could interact for the first time properly. "I can even admire Lord Dayne's effort to help you in this, but your actions were terribly reckless. We must come up with a story to avoid your reputation to be damaged, but I can't see a way of doing it now that the police have been involved." 

"My reputation? That's the only thing you can think about?" Arya asked out of shock and anger. 

"For a woman that is all that matters!" Sansa snapped back harshly. "I'm glad you came to me and not to Starfall with Lord Dayne. That would have ruined you for good, unless he intended to marry you. I'll get you a lawyer. God knows a pauper woman even if from noble stock is hard to marry off." 

"Sometimes I struggle to believe we were born from the same parents." Arya sighed. 

"That's probably the only thing we have in common." Sansa snapped back angrily. "You must know that at some point Lord Stark is certain to knock at my door asking about you and I won't have other option except handling you back to him, unless we find a way out of this guardianship." 

"You can't do this to me!" Arya was suddenly livid with panic. "Have you payed attention to what I've said?!" 

"Yes, I did. I'm worried about your security as well, but I hope you realized that keeping you here right now makes all of us criminals. Your age can be used as an excuse to a certain degree and coming to me was the right thing to do, but if Lord Stark demands you back I can't do anything about it without involving the police and justice court in this dreadful tale." Sansa sighed. "I had great expectations to your future. I thought Lord Stark would eventually see the advantages of marrying you. I thought...I thought him to be reliable and such union would grant your security and keep Winterfell and the title in our family." 

"Is there anything else you can think of but my prospects of marriage?" Arya asked sharply. 

"Yes. Indeed I can. The fact that you are about to drag our family's good name into an unprecedent scandal!" Sansa said it so loud that baby Cat started to cry. "Look at what you've done!" 

"You are the one acting hysterically here." Arya snapped back. "Why they had to die? I doubt Robb or Bran would ever be so cruel to me." 

"Robb would probably go after Lord Stark and challenge him to a duel while Bran would be practical and buy your way out off this mess. I can't do any of those things." Sansa replied as she picked her daughter up and tried to calm baby Cat. "I can only offer you shelter for a while and try to avoid your reputation's ruin, but as I've told you...I can't stop this Jon Targaryen of taking you back." 

Arya went to bed that night without any certainty in her life except that Sansa wouldn't help her. In her dreams Arya was back at Winterfell on a Christmas morning. She could hear the voices of her siblings chatting about the races as her father turn to face her with a warm smile. 

 _"Look dear! We have visitors." He would say to her with enthusiasm as an older woman entered the room wearing a necklace made of black pearls. Her face was long and pretty. Her eyes were fierce and she had a smile that suggested a wicked intelligence._  

 _"What a lovely daughter you have, Ned." The woman said. "I'm sure we could be good friends, don't you think? I have a son, you see. I think he would love to make your acquaintance. Come here, Jon. Come and meat your cousin." She called her son and Arya observed with a mixture of panic and thrill as the familiar young man entered the room carrying a_ _bunch_ _of blue roses in his hands._  

 _"I'm honored to meet you, cousin." He said to her with his usual shy smile and kind eyes. "I brought these for you." Jon offered the_ _flowers under the pleased gaze of their parents._  

 _"Aren't they a lovely couple? What a fortunate match this would be." His mother pointed with a pleased smile. "I believe you Arya could teach my Jon how to smile."_  

 _"Only if your son isn't afraid of a wild spirit. My Arya is a true_ _blizzard_ _. One must be_ _determinate_ _and brave to conquer her wild heart." Her father said while looking at Jon cautiously. "Do you think you can managed it, lad?"_  

 _Jon's eyes never abandoned her and he didn't seem to be moved_ _by her father's words. His eyes looked at her with a determination that would never fade, no matter what. In a way it felt like fate or a_ _familiar_ _tune being played over and over again._  

 _"I'm not afraid and I don't_ _easily_ _give up." His voice was resolute and firm._  

Arya woke up with her heart hammering her chest. It took her a while to calm down and get out of bed. 

To her peace of mind Harry wasn't home, so she only had Sansa to torment her during those days. Without her sister's knowledge Arya wrote a letter to Lord Dayne informing that she was safe at her sister's house and inviting him to tea. 

She waited for an answer from Edric Dayne for a couple of days while trying to keep her mind busy. In the mean time Arya enjoyed the company of her niece and delighted at the fact that you Cat was learning her first words. She tried to teach baby Cat to speak her name, but "Aya" was the closest thing she got as an answer. 

Sansa had a busy schedule that kept her busy all day. Although Lady Aryn had invited her to join the other ladies of society in a fancy tea party at the residence of the Duchess of Devonshire, Arya preferred to stay indoors to avoid unwanted attention. 

The household staff was amiable enough and soon Arya made some new friends. She was almost happy during those days and although her dreams about Jon wouldn't let her forget about her time in the Red Keep, Arya believed that in time  she would rebuild her life. 

Eventually a reply from Lord Dayne arrived at her sister's residence. Arya couldn't help opening the envelope with eagerness and curiosity. 

 _Dear Lady Arya,_  

 _Do not worry over my wellbeing. I assure you I'm quite fine and the police hasn't bothered me since I left King's Cross on that day. Nevertheless, we must be careful for I doubt Lord Stark would ever give up his quest so_ _easi_ _ly_ _._  

 _As promised to you, I_ _seek legal_ _counsel_ _on the matter of your late father's will. So far I've failed to reach a solution to your troubles, but I beg you to keep your faith and hope intact. I_ _shall_ _not_ _re_ _st_ _until you are free from Lord Stark's guardianship._  

 _I would be delighted to join you for tea and I shall pay you and Lady_ _Aryn_ _a visit later today if such an arrangement is convenient for both of you. Please send me a note with your answer. I can barely express my desire to see you again._  

 _With most sincere affection,_  

 _Edric_ _Dayne._  

Although the letter gave her little reason to be optimist, Arya could hardly postpone her meeting with Ned Dayne. She wrote down a short note inviting Dayne to the house that afternoon. 

As she waited for Lord Dayne to arrive, Arya tried to look presentable in her second hand clothes. She couldn't help remembering of Ned's proposal and how Sansa should be kept ignorant of it. 

Arya was holding her niece in her lap when the butler entered the parlor to announce that young man was there for her. Arya asked for tea to be served at the parlor and allowed her visitor to come to her presence. 

She felt strangely anxious and overwhelmed for no apparent reason. Baby Cat wouldn't stop saying "Aya" to call Arya's attention to her teddy bear. Arya couldn't help hugging her niece tightly for a brief second out of genuine love. 

The butler came in once more with its solemn face to announce her visitor. 

"The Much Honorable Jon Targaryen, Lord Stark of Winterfell." At the sound of that name her blood freeze inside her veins as she looked at the door just to see Jon standing there in his finest clothes and caring a bouquet of roses. 

Arya immediately rose from her sit and held baby Cat tightly as if Jon could do the girl any harm. Jon walked toward her with sure steps and a composed posture. 

He must have felt her panic and it made him stop half way. His eyes were still gentle as he smiled at her shyly. 

"I'm sorry for my lack of manners, but I couldn't delay my visit any longer." He said as the butler left the room. "I can't put it in words how glad I am to see you safe and sound, my lady." Jon looked at the child in her arms and smiled at her fondly. "This must be little Cat. She is as lovely as an angel." 

"What are you doing here?" Arya questioned sharply. "I thought you said you wouldn't try to stop me if I decided to find my happiness elsewhere." 

"Indeed I promised you that much." Jon agreed soberly but behind his eyes a cold determination made it quite clear that he would never let go of her without a fight. "But since you accepted my marriage proposal I can't simply let you walk out without giving me the chance to explain myself as I can't ignore the fact that Lord Edric Dayne kidnapped you in an act of villainy. You may hate me once I'm done explaining myself, but I won't go without telling you exactly what happened. As for Edric Dayne...I find it hard to overlook such treason from a man I once called friend, but if my lady would give me just one chance to make things clear I could try to ignore his acts against me and your honor." 

"Are you threatening me?" Arya asked sharply. 

"I would never dream of doing such a thing. I'm simply reminding you that he took you to London without my authorization, which can be defined as kidnapping. Of course such a confuse situation could be nothing but a simple misunderstanding. I would like to have this conversation before Lady Aryn arrives so we can reach an agreement, but I wouldn't mind if she were to participate on the details of the nature of our relationship."        

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's a lot going on in this chapter and so far this fic has been entirely focused on Arya's perspective of the events. I wrote two versions of the last chapter, being the second from Jon's perspective. I decided to not publish Jon's chapter because it would give away a lot of the plot. Since this is something like a Gothic Novel, mystery must be a part of it.  
> Sansa is a young queen bee from London society and the Stark sisters are far from seeing eye to eye. Jon won't take a no for an answer and be prepared for a HUGE argument next chapter (which is already finished).  
> In my mind Jon = Rochester + Heathcliff + Mr. Darcy. You decide if it's a good or a bad sign.  
> I hope you like it and reviews are highly appreciated.


	10. Chapter 10

Arya knew all along that Jon wasn't open to games or tricks and he would never leave without saying everything he wanted to her. Once more she felt powerless before him. Arya pointed him a chair silently. Jon ignored her gesture at first and once more approached her with the flowers in hand. 

"I brought them as a gift to you. I know you like flowers." Jon said shyly. 

"I'll ask for Corbray to put it on a vase. As you can see my hands are full right now." She pointed to baby Cat, who seemed to be fairly interested in Jon's beard. 

"Of course." He finally took a sit after putting the flowers to rest over a small table. 

The atmosphere was so dense that Arya was sure it would be possible to cut it with a knife. Jon seemed to be suddenly embarrassed before her. He looked at her shyly as he considered his next words to her. 

"Why did you felt the need to ran away like you did?" He asked her and Arya could feel the pain in every word even though she wanted to snort at his question. 

"Do you really have to ask?" Arya replied sharply. In fact she wanted to slap his face for having the nerve. "Since my arrival at the Red Keep you kept telling me how dangerous the west wing was. The place was falling to pieces and surely doomed. I told you more than once that I've seen someone walking toward that part of the castle and you tried to convince me that I was seeing things or was plainly mad! When things got out of your control you finally reveled to me that you were keeping a man as a prisoner inside the castle. Your own father!" Arya's voice was surely above the tone her sister would consider to be suitable to a lady's voice. That alone made Jon shrink his shoulders. "I could tell you about all of my fears right now, but just the fact that you dared to lie to me all the time is enough for me to regret my decision of marrying you!" 

Jon avoided looking at her for a moment. Arya observed as he took a few deep breaths as if he was having a hard time to control his temper and picking the right words to answer her. 

"I'm sorry about by poor behavior." He said soberly. "You have every right to question my actions and my honesty. I should...I should have trusted you from the start and I have no one to blame but myself for the low opinion you have of me right now. I had my reasons, though." 

"I'm not even sure if I want to know them." Arya replied sourly. "You were a totally different person! You were cruel and violent! I was frightened and I was afraid of you!" 

"It was never my intention, Arya!" He said immediately. "I lost my temper but not at you. My father he is..." 

"Mad! That much I understood!" She cut him immediately. 

"Yes, he is mad and his illness makes him confuse and when he is confronted with reality he becomes violent as I have witnessed countless times. I still have the scars to prove." Jon said bitterly. "I took me years to realize that he was no longer capable of taking care of himself, let alone the state. Doctors from London and Edinburg have attested his illness. I wanted to keep his name intact. I wanted to spare him and myself of the scandal. I wanted him to have a quiet life out of the public scrutiny and all the medical assistance he might need." Jon pointed calmly. "That's what you've seen. He often believe my mother is alive. When someone tells him she has been dead for years he becomes aggressive and I'm generally his favorite target. If I seemed cruel to him...Believe me when I tell I acted on self defense. I can take you to the doctors if I must offer you proof." 

"Why didn't you tell me? Why did you kept it a secret?" Arya asked in a controlled tone. Jon lowered his head a bit. 

"I was ashamed of telling you the truth, specially because I wanted to make a good impression. Is it so absurd to believe that I wanted the woman I intended to marry to see me as a man she could come to love in time? I abhor the idea that you might consider that one day I might be afflicted by my father's condition. Worst! I hate to think that you might think of me as some villain when I wish for nothing but to make you happy." Jon said fervently. "Yes, I lied to you and kept this dreadful secret. I deserve your anger and your suspicion, but I beg you to believe it when I say that it was my vanity and not some nefarious reason what made me act in the way I did." 

"I don't know what to think of it. I don't know what to think of you." Arya sighed. "I have no guarantee that you won't lie to me in the future. You could have planed to marry me only for my money and once you had it in your power I could be the next mad creature locked inside your castle." 

At that Jon couldn't help an incredulous laugh. 

"Do you honestly believe that my sole reason to marry you is your money?" Jon asked out of sarcasm and shock. "I do not need your fortune, Arya! I inherited my mother's share and that alone would be more than you have to your name. I have total control over my father's fortune and lands. I inherited your father's title and Winterfell, along with other properties...Arya, why would I go through so much trouble in order to get my hand on twenty thousand pounds when my lands alone provide me more than that in one year? Why would I do such a thing when I intend to grant you an income of five thousand pounds a year once we are married? If you doubt my intentions so much why not ask for Tarly's presence so he can show you the paper I've already signed?" 

"I had no idea of the extension of your fortune. I never cared about it even though you love to remember me of the advantages of marring you and how secure I would be as Lady Stark of Winterfell." Arya replied feeling gravely wounded in her pride. 

"Would you rather have me saying that I don't have a penny to my name but would work hard to provide you a comfortable life? Tell me what you want from me and you shall have it." 

"Your honesty is all I ever asked, but you never trusted me enough to share your secrets!" Arya snapped back. 

"As I asked for your loyalty, but you ran away before the break of dawn in the company of another man a few hours after accepting my proposal!" Jon nearly roared, making baby Cat cry out of fear. 

Arya's attentions immediately turned to the crying baby in her arms. Jon regretted his short temper and distressed at the sigh of a frightened innocent child that had nothing to do with that conversation. 

"I'm sorry...I didn't...I didn't want to scare her." His voice immediately lowered and displayed his constriction. 

"As you didn't want to do a number of things but did anyway." Arya replied sourly. "You wanted me to listen to your reasons and I did. I guess this conversation is over." 

"I don't think so." Jon insisted sharply. "You gave me your word and my intentions haven't changed in which concerns the marriage. I'm not leaving London without you. I wronged you and now you know everything there is to be known about me. There will be no more secrets between us and I intend to keep all the promises I've made to you." 

"Why are you insisting on it?" She asked with tears in her eyes. "I'm tired! I'm tired of losing those I love and I'm tired of not having a place to call home anymore. I can't keep doing it. You can't simply break my heart and think that I'll forgive you every time." 

"Than forgive me only this time and you won't have to experience it again." Jon rose from his sit. "Forgive me and you won't have to step inside the castle any more. We will live a happy life in Winterfell." 

"Now you are being cruel." She answered stubbornly.  

"Than I can only find in you my soulmate since your cruelty matches mine in every aspect." Jon kneeled in front of her with carrying something in his hand. "I'll make a fool of myself again. I won't give up without telling you the truth without fancy poems or elaborate metaphors. I don't want my words to be misunderstood." He finally extended her his open hand were a ring displaying a marvelous set of ruby and diamonds rested. "I love you, Lady Arya. I love you as I haven't loved anyone else in my life." 

Her voice was stuck in her throat as if something was blocking the way. Arya looked at Jon's face and she saw not even one hint of doubt or reason. In fact his hand was trembling and his breath was uneven. 

"Marry me for whatever reason you might have, knowing that mine have nothing to do with convenience."His words came out fervently, making her mute for long enough to someone open the door. 

Sansa entered the room followed by Lord Dayne. Needless to say that her sister looked at the scene with utter shock while Ned's face was transfixed in blank mask. In a way it seemed that Ned had seen a ghost. 

If Jon was embarrassed to be seen on his knees almost begging for her to forgive him, he never let it show. In fact he kept a cool demeanor and his usually sober complexion. If Arya was to be honest, Jon had little to no reason to fear Sansa or Edric Dayne since the law was on his side. If so he wanted, Jon could drag her out of the house and take her back to the Red Keep and no one would have any power to stop him of doing so. 

"I would really like to know what in the name of God is going on under my roof." Although her tone was sweet, Sansa's voice let it clear how furious she was. 

Jon rose from the floor immediately as he tried to make himself presentable in front of her sister. Ned limited to look at Lord Stark with a bit of apprehension, but never tried to provoke Jon's anger. 

"I'm sorry for my lack of manner, my lady. Although I would like to present myself to you under more adequate circumstances, but I had an urgent matter to address to Lady Arya...One that I couldn't afford to delay any longer." He said it in a sober and polite way. "I am Jon Targaryen." 

"Oh!" That was all Sansa had to say for a few seconds. "Lord...Stark. What a delight to finally make your acquaintance. If I had any idea you would be joining us for tea, I would have made a more entertaining event of it." 

Arya could tell that her sister was petrified by her fear of scandals and also thrilled by what she have  witnessed. That match was everything Sansa ever wanted for her sister and a safe way out to any scandalous rumor that might be connected to Arya's name. Arya could see the wheels turning inside her sister's head and there was no way of Sansa let go of the matter any time soon. 

"You are most kind, my lady. Unfortunately I extended my visit for far too long. I shall repay your kindness and hospitality shortly. Lady Aryn and her sister are more than welcome to join me for tea." Jon answered elegantly. 

"We certainly shall." Sansa replied with a modest smile. "On a proper date. After a formal invitation." That was her way of hinting that if he wanted her support, Jon would have to oblige to strict rules of decorum. "We will be delighted. I can't say how much I appreciated your kindness. I missed my little sister dearly." 

"I'm glad to see Lady Arya under your care, although she is sorely missed at the Red Keep." Jon said briefly. That made Sansa smile even brighter. He wasn't interested in scandals and he certainly wanted Arya's reputation to be intact. "I was telling Lady Arya how much I would appreciate to have a family gathering for Christmas. It was my intention to hold a celebration at Winterfell, but since we are all here for the season...I guess London will do." 

"I will wait for your invitation avidly." Sansa said as her smile seemed to be made of stone. "May I present you Lord Edric Dayne of Starfall?" 

Ned finally got out of his state of shock to display a polite smile. 

"Lord Stark and I are old friends from Oxford." Ned explained in a light tone that emulated triviality. "I must say that it is an extraordinary occasion to meet you in London. I thought you hated the city." 

"I'm nor averse to diversion. Since Lady Arya was eager to pay her sister a visit, I don't see why I should deny her such a dear moment of sisterly affection and also present her to what London has to offer in terms of entertainment." Arya was certain that if Jon had a gun in hands he would have shoot Ned Dayne right before her eyes. Sansa must have seen it too. 

"The opera!" Sansa cut the conversation before it became any more obvious how much Jon wanted to snap Ned's neck. "I'm taking my sister to the opera next Friday night. Norma is an absolute favorite of mine. Would you join us, Lord Stark?" 

"I would be delighted to do so. My box is at your disposal." Jon offered as he bowed his head lightly. "I must take my leave now. Good day, ladies. Lord Dayne." 

Just like that Jon left the house. 

Sansa picked Cat from Arya's arms while she looked at Dayne as if he was some dead animal stinking her perfect house. Arya wouldn't have to be a genius to see that her sister was trying to think of a way to dispose of Dayne's inconvenient presence without make a fuss of it. 

If Ned had any kind of news to share about breaking Jon's guardianship, Arya would have to wait to hear it. 

Tea was served and the conversation soon became unpleasant and mechanic to the point of making her want to tear her eyes out. Arya wanted to go to her room and stay there forever instead of thinking about meeting Jon again. 

At least Ned was reasonable enough to leave the house a few minutes after Jon's departure, leaving Arya and Sansa alone. 

"What really happened between you and Lord Stark?" Sansa asked carefully looking. "Don't even try to tell me that nothing happened because I saw the man on his knees literally begging you to accept his ring and you were crying...So you better start telling me the truth." 

Arya put her cup aside and tried to think of a way to tell Sansa that she had accepted Jon's proposal only a few hours before she ran away from the Red Keep and never really told him that she had changed her mind, which made the engagement still valid. 

"He wants me to marry him." Arya said simply. 

"That much I could see. I want to know is if you gave him an answer already." Sansa stated coldly. 

"He proposed to me when I was at the Red Keep." Arya pointed. "He had made his affections public, although no engagement had been announced." 

"Did you give him an answer there?" Sansa sipped the tea from her cup. 

"Yes." Arya rolled her eyes. "I accepted it, but it was before I found out what was going on inside the house!" 

"You mean Lord Rhaegar's illness to which I'm sure Lord Stark gave you a perfectly acceptable explanation to." Sansa pointed sarcastically. "You ran away from your fiancé after months being under his custody. You dared to came here asking for my help when you already had the perfect solution in your hands!" 

"I refuse to marry someone who thought to be necessary to tell me lies all the time. I was scared! I was afraid of him once I saw him with Lord Rhaegar and I didn't want to marry him anymore!" Arya finally lost her temper. 

"You better be prepared to marry Dayne than." Sansa pointed sharply. "I will fix this mess you've made. I will prevent you from ruining our family's good name even if I die in the process! You could have listened to him! You could have tried to calm down before acting! You could have asked for my opinion on what to do but instead you chose to play the hopeless heroine, chased by a villain that as far as you know only exists in your mind!" 

"Will you cast me out?" Arya asked with tears coming to her eyes once more. 

"No. You are my sister and I wouldn't turn my back at you like this." Sansa said although Arya had a hard time to believe her to be that benevolent. "At least he hasn't changed his mind. You can still fix it." 

"I don't want to fix anything." Arya insisted as Sansa stared at her with evident anger. "I won't marry Jon." 

"It's either him or Lord Dayne." Sansa highlighted it as a matter of fact. "You don't have to decide it now. Take your time to think about it. In the mean time I'll provide you with a number of social events to cheer you up. It's about time for you to be introduced to society. The opera is a good start." 

"I won't go to the opera with him." Arya's head started to ache. 

"Yes, you will. Even if you don't marry him as far as we know you are attached to Lord Stark until you are of age. You can't avoid him forever even if you want to." At least about that Sansa was right. "Your very future lies on his hands right now and you should consider it before making him your enemy instead of your husband. For now he is being kind to you but if you keep acting as you are acting now he might change his heart and decide to make your life fairly difficult." 

 "What is your suggestion?" Arya finally gave up. 

"You don't have to answer him right away. There was never an announcement, so...As far as people know he was just being a kind guardian to you." Sansa said. "We won't be able to avoid him and since he is family to us mutual invitations will be expected. You'll buy your time while I try to figure our next move. I'll find out his intentions in case of a rejection." 

"What if he proves to be a bad sort of loser?" Arya asked as she felt truly afraid about her future for the first time. 

"Than I'm afraid you won't have much choice, unless you truly desire to walk this earth penniless with nothing to rely on but your name and wit." Sansa looked at her with genuine concern. 

There was a long moment of silence between them and this time Arya couldn't help her tears. Seeing him again had been too much for her to bare. She felt hopeless and childish most of the time and once Jon got on his knees Arya could barely stand on her two feet.  

The sight her tears made Sansa soften a bit, something that was so rare that Arya could barely believe. Sansa tried to dry her tears, all to no avail. 

"May I ask you something?" Sansa finally asked, but Arya simply nod with her head. "I've seen how you look at Lord Stark. If I know you at all you would have never accepted him unless you had feelings for our mysterious cousin. Do you love him, Arya?" 

"How could I love him?" Arya asked with her face still cover in tears. "How can I love someone who is incapable of telling me the truth?" 

"If you didn't love him, I doubt you would ever be so hurt about this matter as you are." Sansa replied without a hint of humor or kindness. "You were never good at doing things you were told to do. Sometimes I think the only reason for your stubbornness in this matter is because marring cousin Jon is exactly what everyone will tell you to do. Even if you like him you will keep telling yourself the opposite or finding excuses to reject him." 

"I've never seen you defending anyone so fiercely." Arya accused her sister. 

"What would you do if you saw me throwing away a chance of keeping our home and the title in our family? You would have called me names already and accused me of being frivolous and selfish. That's exactly what you are doing. I know you revolt at the idea that as women we can't have the right to our own home. I understand it and I even sympathize with your cause. If you at least had the courage to say that you find him to be repulsive or that you hate him for some reason, than I would tell you to reject him already. Lord Stark isn't half as handsome as Edric Dayne, or that blacksmith you used to fancy a few years ago. That much is true, but he is far from being hideous. He is young, presentable even under all that hair, wealthy and ridiculously in love with you even when you humiliate him publicly." 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is all about parents screwing their kids lives, misunderstanding, reckless marriage proposals and awkward situations involving one's relatives. XD  
> I hope you'll like it and reviews are appreciated.


	11. Chapter 11

Anyone who had the fortune of seeing Lady  Aryn  getting out of her carriage would think that she was just a home sick lady paying a visit to her former house.

Indeed she was a homesick lady, but her visit to the imposing manor with splendorous view to Kensington's Gardens had little to do with nostalgia. To all intends and purposes, Lady  Aryn  was dutifully  paying  her father's heir a visit, which was expected and encouraged between relatives, e specially  those of high rank in society.

Lord Stark had been most kind to invite her for tea, although his request for secrecy and discretion from her part was most suspicious.  Sansa had no idea of what sort of matter might have leaded Lord Stark to invite her to his brand new residence, but she could guess it had to do with her sister's unexplainable behavior.

Once the front door was open she could barely contain her tears. Mr.  Luwin  usually sober face smiled at her fondly as his eyes displayed his surprise to see her.

"Dear Mr.  Luwin ." She said as the old man bowed before her.

The old butler had served the Starks in London for years and literally had seen all the Stark children  growing  up. He had also, from time to time, served as tutor in matters of history and royalty, since no one knew about those things with such competence.

"It is a great pleasure to see my lady walking through this door once more." He said with blind loyalty and devotion so usual in the elder servants of an old and proud household. "His lordship will receive you in the library."

"Is Lord Stark a good master to this house, Mr.  Luwin ?" She asked as she handled her coach and furs to the old butler.

Lady  Aryn's  curiosity would never be  set tled  without a confirmation of a man as observant and strict as  Luwin . Sansa could still remember how he and Mr. Poole had spoken against Lady Arya being put to guardianship, especially when nobody had ever known of that man named Jon Targaryen.

If he approved of the new Lord Stark as a master, than Sansa had little reason to be concerned over her sister's security under his care, being it as a guardian or as a husband.

"Indeed we found the new Lord to be most agreeable and generous so far. He reminds me of your late father in his youth. The same face, quiet disposition and a taste for sports and good horses."  Luwin  said as if all those qualities were a rare surprise. "I speak for all the staff when I say that we have missed my lady and dear Lady Arya. We hoped to receive her once more, but given the most unusual circumstances of her guardianship, it is understandable that Lady Arya would seek comfort in the presence of her sister."

"You are most kind, Mr.  Luwin . My sister is in good health and I shall send her your love." Sansa replied in a warm and gentle way, although the topic was most inconvenient to her. "Would you please announce my presence?"

" At once, my lady."

As  Luwin  moved away to  announce  Sansa properly, Lady  Aryn  couldn't help looking around just to realize that her cousin hadn't changed a thing inside the house. She could almost listen to her siblings voice and the sound of her old piano as her mother laughed lightly at something Bran had just said.

Sadness wasn't an appropriate feeling  f o r  a lady to display, especially if she had her mind focused in a business of the most urgent nature. Sansa forced herself to smile  courteously  as she entered the library just to find Lord Stark distracted with a number of papers.

"Please have a sit, my lady. Make yourself comfortable." He said without paying her much attention.  In fact he sounded a bit annoyed. "This is your house  after all."  The sarcasm was undeniable.

Sansa found her cousin to be very relapse in his manner, which would certainly grant him a bad reputation among ladies and fine gentlemen. Maybe Arya had more sense and refinement than Sansa ever gave her credit for.

She took a sit by the fireplace and took solace in the familiarity of the room  as she waited for an explanation for the sudden invitation .

"I hope my lord to find the house to your liking. I have very happy memories in this room." Sansa pointed. " It is a relief to see that nothing has changed.  Lord  Aryn  asked for my hand in this very room."

"I found it to be quite cozy and charming  as it is  despite of my sour moods." Jon replied as he finally took the time to look at her properly. "As for the happy memories...I have yet to make my own here."

He wasn't interested in her nostalgia or small talk. That Jon Targaryen had an approach far more suitable to one of those brute industrials than to a gentleman of noble birth.

"I was surprised to receive your invitation. Such an unusual necessity for  discre tion  made me wonder what sort of business would demand it." Sansa pointed with evident  annoyance .

Lord Stark let and  ap ologetic  smile along with a light reverence.  At least he seemed to recognize how unusual his request was.

"After the unfortunate even t  my lady witnessed at your house it was only reasonable and adequate that I  repaid  your hospitality and explained myself properly." Lord Stark said in a calm tone.  An  explanation  at last! "I was most worried about Lady Arya's wellbeing. I couldn't delay my visit at that point."

"I understand that my sister hasn't been allowed to join me in London." Sansa said as she  played  with the diamond ring on her finger  while trying to keep her avid curiosity under control.

"Arya never requested for my  permission  to visit her sister, but I assure you that I  wouldn't  have  opposed  to it." Lord Stark said soberly and for a moment Sansa could almost see her late father in front of her. "A terrible  misunderstanding  lead Lady Arya to believe that her safety was in peril in my company."

"I'll assume that much isn't true." Sansa added cautiously.

" Precisely." Jon agreed  with a hint of relief as Sansa tried to present herself as his ally . "An unfortunate episode involving my father's poor mental condition."

"Is Lord  Rhaegar  well?" She asked out of duty.

"As much as possible. He has been moved to a comfortable and quiet place were he will be able to live his last years out of public judgement. Dragonstone has always been his favorite residence. I hope he will find some peace there."

"It sounds like a cruel fate." Sansa said sadly.

"Better than a mental institution and  definitely safer for anyone near me." Lord Stark said with melancholy. "I could only do it now that I gained in court  full control over his property. He was declared insane and  uncappable  of any act of civilian life. That's what Lady Arya witnessed. The very extension of his madness. No wonder she was scared  at his fit of rage ."

"I'm sorry about her behavior." Lady Sansa said immediately. "This wasn't the education mama gave her."

"No need for  apologies . I'm the one to be blamed in this. I should have been honest with Lady Arya from the start. It's only fair that she treats me with suspicion." His voice was genuinely sad and yet whenever he spoke Arya's name he would do it in a sweet way. "If she will forgive me or not is for her to decide, meanwhile I'm glad to see her under your vigilant eyes."

"I understand  that my Lord won't present charges." Sansa highlighted with curiosity and  apprehension .

"I did  present them  at first. I had my reasons to distrust the gentleman who  escorted  her to London." Lord Stark said  with resolute conviction . "Once I confirmed she had seek refuge in your house I had no reason to insist on the matter. I would rather avoid any scandal that might have tainted her reputation."

"And yet I found my lord on his knees with a ring in hand almost begging my sister to have it...In a closed room...Without a chaperone." Sansa marked every sentence with her unusual sarcasm.

"Again...Lady Arya is blameless in this." Lord Stark insisted ap ologetically . "As my lady might have concluded...I asked for the privilege of her hand in marriage."

"A proposal she  had already accepted and I would be more than pleased to grant my blessing as her only living family." Jon smiled at Sansa's sudden  enthusiasm .

"Yes...She accepted it and for a moment I was a very happy man. Unfortunately my poor behavior might have made Lady Arya change her mind about it. I tried to explain myself and insisted on the match, but it is for her to decide if I am deserving of her or not.  I would rather be prudent and not  le t  my hopes soar to high before a definitive answer from her part . " Jon said  while trying to control his evident fears of rejection. "I didn't call you here o discuss the unfortunate  circum stances  of my relationship with Lady Arya. My invitation has a more practical purpose. If Lady Arya is to reject my proposal there's little I can do to change her mind, but I'll still have obligations to her safety and wellbeing. I  have already instructed my servants to deliver her personal  belong ings  to your house.  I have no objection of Lady Arya staying under your care if so she wishes."

"Would it mean my lord intends to transfer her guardianship? "  Sansa questioned feeling suddenly thrilled.

"Not at all. Only that Lady Arya and I woul d no longer  live under the same roof." Lord Stark  correcte d  her . "I would  contin ue  to administrate her finances until she is of age or married to someone else. I would continue to pay for her expenses and granting her a monthly income for her to expend however she wants."

"Here I thought you would never allow her to marry someone else." Lady  Aryn  pointed curiously. Lord Stark let a  humorless  laugh escape.

"I still have my pride, Lady  Aryn . If my dear cousin can't stand the sight of me, than I won't force her to have me. I won't oppose to her happiness and if she finds someone worthy of her affections than I can only make sure she will be as happy as she deserves. Of course any suitor for her hand must prove to be financially secure and honorable. I'll have no less."

"May I ask why go through so much trouble?" Lady Sansa asked out of shock. "This is an extremely generous and gracious  attitude destined to a woman that must have wounded your pride gravely."

"It's a fair question. Neither I or Arya have asked for this awkward circumstance. Although I can't say that her actions don't hurt me I also have in mind that once my mother stood in her place. She rejected a suitor in order to marry my father in a scandalous event. I do not want to take revenge on a young lady who reminds me so much of my mother's misfortunes. My mother was casted out of her own family and I know she died  hea r t broken  because of it . She was fortunate enough to marry a rich man. Otherwise she would have become a bagger." His voice was  unbearably  sad at that point. "Let us say that I'm paying for my parents sins."

At that Lady  Aryn  could  bare ly  believe in her sister's stupidity. Standing in front of her there was a young man ready to lay heaven s on Arya's feet, but the young Stark girl was to proud and stubborn to admit that Lord Stark was an ideal match in every aspect.

"Should I presume that Lord Dayne wouldn't be accepted as a suitor to Arya's hand?" She asked cautiously. If that was the case...What sort of secrets Lord Dayne was  hidin g ?

"Definitely not." Jon Targaryen answered without giving further explanations to his aversion to  Edric  Dayne. "Lord Dayne is a nuisance I have yet to deal with, but I fervently advise you not to allow him anywhere near Lady Arya."

"Will my lord explain to me why?" Lady Sansa was nearly biting her nails out of curiosity and she even suspected her reaction to be some sort of  amusement  to her cousin.

"I have no intention of sharing the things I know about Ned Dayne in which concerns his morality, but I suppose it would  suffice  to say that Arya's inheritance would save him  from  bankruptcy ." Jon answered sourly. "If I am to lose her to someone else, than at least I'll make sure this man is able to offer her everything that I'm ready to gran t ."

"You do know that the number of available bachelors with your fortune isn't that great, don't you my lord?" At that Jon muffled a laugh.

"I'm not talking about fortune, but character. I'm talking about a simple man too proud to ever accept the idea of taking Arya's money or a noble one who is capable of keeping his own finances under control. If Arya is to reject me for someone else...I'll make sure it will b e for love and nothing else."

"Is there anything else?"  Lady Sansa asked out of politeness.

"Indeed there is." Lord Stark added. "Arya is to be formally introduced to society and I insist on the matter of regular  visit s  to both Winterfell and this house from both Stark sisters." At that a stubborn tear escaped Lady  Aryn's  house. "Winterfell is your home and I am the  intruder , so...It's only right to allow both of you to have access to it for as long as you like. Christmas celebrations too. I don't have a family and I would enjoy to feel part of one."

"It would be my pleasure to attend all those requests. I would love to see Cat running around the gardens of Winterfell." Lady Sansa said it with a huge smile on her face.

"Speaking of the adorable lady Catelyn..." Jon opened his drawer in search of something. He picked up a silver rattle in the shape of a girl holding a teddy bear. "I would like her to have this. It  has been  in my family in a while but I guess she will make a better use of it."

"It is a  lovel y  gift. I'm sure she will love it, but wouldn't it be more prudent to save such a relic for your own child ren ?" She questioned and couldn't hope noticing the melancholy in his eyes.

"I'm not sure if I'll ever have children, although I would love to." He said kindly. " S ome creatures are meant to walk the earth alone  and I guess I'm one of them . I'll be more than happy to spoil little Cat, though."

Lady  Aryn  rose from her seat  sudden ly  taken by unprecedent conviction. She was  positivel y  sure that her sister was making a terrible mistake by rejecting Lord Stark's affections. If Sansa Stark had ever made up her mind about something that was she would have Arya  seeing  reason before it was too late. Her sister would marry Lord Stark even if Lady  Aryn  had to play dirty to ensure it.

"I would like my lord to know for sure that I am your  ally  in this. I'll do everything you asked and more. I won't rest until Arya realizes the extension of her stupidity." Lady Sansa said fervently.

"Do not interfere in this matter, my lady." Lord Stark replied with conviction. "If Lady Arya is to have me is for her to decide on her own free will , not because of whatever you might think about her prospects of marriage."

Lord Stark could say whatever he wanted on the matter and try to follow his own book of rules, but Lady Sansa would have none of it. Winterfell was the prize, along with the rights to the title and the money. According to law  she was an  Aryn , but  Sansa would always be a Stark and so would Arya. Their mother used to say that there must always be a Stark in Winterfell and Sansa would rather die than allow some Mary, Anne or Jane from N owhere Hall to take the place that was meant to be Arya's.

Arya could  barel y  believe her eyes once she saw all the dresses and  jewelries  laid on her bed . Jon ha d sent back all of her belongings, including the black pearls that belonged to his mother. In a way it felt as if he was giving up of his plan, but also gave her a sense of freedom .

Sansa seemed  unimpressed  with his gesture and even acted boldly enough to make a jest of it. "What would he do with so many dresses? I doubt it would bring up his eyes." In another time Arya would have laughed at it, but not when she felt a bit hollow and often so  lone ly  inside her sister's house.

Lady  Aryn  was making an herculean effort to present Arya to society, which included a number of dull tea parties and other events. She hated every one of them, but Sansa insisted that they should pose as if nothing had happened.

She noticed that Ned Dayne had avoided her company in those days, which was probably Jon's fault. Arya could hardly blame Ned since he had already helped her risking his own reputation and freedom. That  was just another statement of Jon's  vindic tive  character, while Ned Dayne had been nothing but a true friend who helped her in times of distress.

Sansa was thrilled with their night at the opera, especially with Jon's invitation to his private box. Arya would gladly stay in her room that night, but her sister would never allow it. It would be the first time she would face Jon again since the day he invaded the house to have that awkward conversation with her.

The perspective of spending a whole night by his side while her sister tried to be the civilized lady sounded like a  nightmare . Even so, Arya was aware that she had little to no choice in the matter.

She looked at her image reflected in the mirror and couldn't help noticing that she looked older and tired. Her dress was the very same she had used during her first ball and the pearls seemed a cruel remind of the night she had made him  promis es . Arya would  r ather  not use the necklace, but Sansa had insisted upon it.

When the  char iot arrived Sansa acted as if it was her first time at the opera. Arya couldn't help laughing at her sister's behavior even if she felt miserable for all that mess involving Jon.

He looked as good as Arya expected even if she had never seen him wearing fur and a top hat. London forced him to look more sophisticated, while in the Red Keep he ignored any impulses of vanity unless he had guests to  entertain .

Jon bowed to her and Sansa before helping them to the chariot. His thumb brushed Arya's hand gently in a subtle display of affection that would never pass her by  unnoticed . He was still waiting. He wouldn't give up.

He took his place at the chariot, sitting in front of both sisters and trying to act as a true gentleman, even if his simple and careless ways often came to surface.

"Oh I love the opera!" Sansa tried to start a civilized conversation. "Our parents would come often. Do you remember it, Arya? Mama used to look gorgeous."

"I remember the way she smelled whenever she got dressed for the night. I remember looking at the top of her head from my window. I remember her complaining that father had fallen asleep before the first act was over. " Arya answered sadly. "She looked like a fairy in her blue dress."

"The opera is probably one of my favorite things about London. I first came here with my father. He used to love music and I guess... Com ing  to the opera with him is probably my fondest memory of my youth."

"I presume it was before you locked him up." Arya said sharply to Sansa's utter shame. Jon seemed unimpressed with her acid remark.

"Arya, be quiet!" Sansa pinched her arm to make her shut up, but Jon looked at her placidly.

"Indeed. He wasn't violent at that time. At least not as often as he became a few years later." Jon answered as a matter of fact and that made her less inclined to provoke him. "In his youth he was a handsome and brilliant man. It was terrible to see him turning into something else. Suddenly the charm and elegance vanished, his fits of anger became frequent...He started to hear voices and often claimed to see my mother. When I came back to school I could  barely recognize him, but I only decided that I should do something about it once he nearly killed me for declaring that I was renouncing my inheritance."

"You don't owe us any explanations, Lord Stark." Sansa said out of embarrassment and even Arya couldn't help lowering her eyes.

"Yes, I do." He answered  stubbornly . "My silence about this matters brought nothing but misunderstandings about my character. We are family after all and until very recently neither of you had ever heard a thing about me. I deserve your suspicion and distrust, but it's up to me to put an end to all the mystery and conquer your trust."

"This attempt of murder came before or after you tried to marry your sweetheart?" Arya asked abruptly and at that Jon lowered his eyes.

"It was when I told him about my intentions of marrying Ygritte. I said I didn't want his money and tittles and he nearly killed me in a fit of rage. Ygritte saw me all bruised on the next day and I told her I got involved in a fight in the pub. She rejected me for being a  penniless  drunk, when I was just penniless at the time." Jon replied with evident  embarrassment . "Do you have any more questions?"

"For now it's enough." Arya replied as the chariot stopped in front of the theater.

"Good." He sighed. "I guess we can enjoy the evening now."

Even after all the embarrassment, Jon still helped them out of the chariot and insisted on conducting both the ladies to his private box. Even though Arya was still confused about everything, she couldn't help feeling a bit  as hamed  for exposing him in such a way.

Arya even had to admit to herself that...She was sorry about her actions and about Jon's tragic life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Reviews are highly appreciated.


	12. Chapter 12

The opera was an earthly nightmare. Not that the performance wasn’t exquisite, but the tension standing between them was asphyxiating. Jon stood between her and Sansa so Arya simply couldn’t address to her sister to inform her of some sudden indisposition that would excuse her from the event.

At that point Arya’s rage over his lie had been turned into something else. She was actually sorry for her accusations and most of all devastated at Jon’s story of a cruel youth. In a way it served for her to realize that her vivid imagination, her grief and her fears had led her to hasty conclusions about Jon and his intentions.

He didn’t need her money and if Tarly’s name had been brought up in the conversation than it would be easy for her to check the information Jon presented. It was understandable that he had little to no reason to trust Rhaegar’s temper, especially when he had witnessed and experienced his father’s fits of violence first hand.

Arya was honestly mortified at her behavior and even if didn’t accept his proposal she at least owned him apologies.

During the interlude Sansa excused herself to fetch a glass of champagne, letting them alone for the first time since the incident at Lady Aryn’s parlor. In the silence between them stood all those heartbroken feelings they collected and at that point, even if she still found it difficult to trust him, Arya couldn’t deny that she missed his company.

“How do you find the opera?” Jon eventually asked in his usual gentle attempts of engaging in civilized conversation.

“I couldn’t say.” Arya answered with honesty. “I think I barely listened to a single line sang.”

He lowered his head to conceal a muffled laugh. She couldn’t help finding that impertinent and offensive. Was he laughing at her feelings or her incapacity of appreciating a musical masterpiece?

“I can’t say that I listened either.” Jon answered with a hint of humor and for a second Arya felt relieved as if she had been holding her breath since the moment they left Sansa’s house. “It’s a pity. I really like the opera, but I think I’m not in the right mood to enjoy it fully.”

“Why is that?” Arya asked rhetorically.

Jon didn’t say a word for a while as Arya tried to avoid looking at him. When she thought he wouldn’t submit his pride to another humiliation by professing his love for her once more, Jon surprised her again.

Arya felt his hand holding hers in a bold and yet gentle display of affection. The gloves felt like a metaphor for all the things standing between them. He was looking at her with his usually gentle eyes, but this time there was something else in his gaze. Something like a burning fire and at that Arya shivered.

“I find your proximity distracting especially when you are wearing this dress and these pearls.” He answered in a low and slightly husky tone. “It reminds me of a certain night, in an empty ballroom.”

Arya felt her cheeks burning with embarrassment and for a moment she didn’t know how to answer to his boldness. In fact she had thought the same and she had been fighting the memory of their first and only kiss at all cost.

“I suppose that Lady Sansa doesn’t know everything that happened that night.” Jon said while entwining his fingers with hers. “She would probably be scandalized.”

“Why are you talking about it now?” She asked in hushed tone as if whispering a secret. “I thought you would be mad at me for the chariot talk and my lack of answers.”

“You are angry with me for omitting a great deal of things. I can’t really say that I didn’t give you cause to feel this way.” He answered in a close whisper. “As for the chariot...It doesn’t make me comfortable to be exposed like that, but you said something that gave me at least a bit of hope. You asked about Ygritte and referred to her as my sweetheart. Your tone gave me this feeble hope that maybe you were jealous.”

“Don’t be absurd.” Arya snorted in disdain. “Why would I be jealous of a woman that wouldn’t think twice before turning down a man for his lack of fortune?”

“Perhaps because you are considering turning me down for the excess of it while you try to convince yourself that you can’t accept me for hiding things from you.” He answered honestly. “Are you really angry at me or at the idea that I am exactly what everyone would deem as ideal to you in terms of future?”

That question had pierced her heart and pride like no blade and no argument could. She had no answer to give him. Sansa had thrown a similar accusation at her and even at that occasion Arya hadn’t been able to offer her sister a straight answer.

Now that he was so close to her and his cologne made her feel a bit dizzy, Arya couldn’t help remember the kiss and how she felt while she was within his arms. Her reasons to deny and avoid him suddenly felt small and insignificant, or maybe they were indeed so devastating because she cared about him more than she dared to admit.

Before she could answer him Sansa came back to the box. Jon let go of her hand and tried to return to his usually sober demeanor, while Arya tried hard to conceal her flushed face.

She looked around the theater just to realize how public that whispered conversation had been. Everyone in the audience with a view to their box could tell that they were a couple failing at keeping their affair concealed. If that reached Sansa’s ears it would be a nightmare. Her sister would never let her go out of the house again.

The second act started and Arya tried to pay attention to the songs and the libretto in an attempt of ignoring Jon’s proximity. At that point she just wanted to go back to her sister’s home and hide under the covers for eternity.

It took a while for the opera to end, but when the time to go home finally arrived Arya couldn’t feel more relieved.

During the whole path to Sansa’s house Jon’s eyes wouldn’t focus in anything else but her. It was annoying even if it would make her feel strangely hot and overwhelmed. It felt like he was undressing her with his gaze. Sansa ignored his behavior, but Arya doubted that his indiscretion had passed unnoticed by Lady Aryn.

“Would you joying us for a bit of Port Wine, my lord?” Sansa invited Jon as it was expected, although Arya hoped for him to leave them alone as soon as possible.

“Perhaps something stronger.” Jon suggested politely. Sansa smiled at him with utter satisfaction.

“There’s an old bottle of whiskey that I’ve been saving for especial occasions. The best of Winterfell’s spirit in a bottle, if I may say. It will give you a taste of our home.” Sansa said elegantly. “I think a good night spent in such charming company deserves the appropriate drink.

“It sounds perfect.” Jon agreed to Arya’s utter despair.

Jon followed them into Lady Aryn’s house all the way to the parlor. Sansa poured them a generous glass of whiskey and a small chalice of Port to Arya. According to her sister it wasn’t appropriated for a young lady to drink stronger spirits such as scotch and brandy, even if Arya had tasted her father’s whiskey several times.

The taste of the drink seemed to please Lord Stark greatly and soon Sansa tried to engage in meaningless conversation with their cousin just to play the role of hostess to perfection. Jon didn’t seem to enjoy the chat, but was polite enough to play along with it just to extend his permanence in the house a while longer.

“It would be wonderful to visit Winterfell during Summer. I’m not sure Cat’s health would agree with the harsh Winter weather.” Sansa said elegantly.

“You are most welcome to visit the house whenever suits you. I’m sure all the staff and the locals would be delighted to have your ladyship visiting the state.” Jon remained as polite as ever, while telling everything Sansa would like to hear. At that point Arya have had several chalices of Port, but the drink had done nothing to her anxiety.

“Speaking of Cat, I should check on her. Do excuse me, cousin. Arya will keep you company while I check on my darling girl.” Sansa didn’t bother to wait for his answer before leaving the room.

Once more Arya was alone with Jon inside that room and at that point she felt feverish and anxious. Jon seemed to notice that much and as an attempt of soothing her he passed Arya his glass of whiskey.

“I guess the night is being way more overwhelming than we both expected.” Jon said gently. “Maybe a sip will make you feel a bit less tense.”

Arya didn’t answer at first. She accepted the glass and drank it in a single gulp to Jon’s amusement. The burning sensation in her throat was welcome and reassuring.

“You do have a taste for fiery spirits, don’t you?” He asked with his awkward sense of humor.

“Father used to let me taste it. Eventually Robb would sneak a flask to me after dinner.” She confessed. “Bran and I used to get drunk easily, but we never stopped.”

“Does your staying here make you feel at home?” He asked politely. “You doesn’t seem comfortable whenever she is near.”

“It’s because I’m not.” Arya answered as she felt light headed and more relaxed. “I know I’m a nuisance to her and it’s not as if we had a close relationship. This is not my home. It’s just another house where I live out of someone’s mercy.”

“It doesn’t have to be this way.” He said and his voice was full of concern and hope. “Would you feel more comfortable in the London house? I’m sure Luwin would be delighted to serve you again. I can go back to the Keep or even Winterfell and you can stay there for as long as you like.”

“I’m not sure what scares me more. Living of someone’s mercy or go back to the house or Winterfell just to find them empty.” A stubborn tear escaped form her eyes. “I’m alone. I belong to nowhere and this is terrifying.”

She didn’t see him rising from his seat to cross the parlor toward her. Before Arya could protest Jon was already sitting by her side and offering her his handkerchief.

“I think this is the first time I see you crying.” He said with a hint of exasperation in his voice. “I honestly don’t know what to do to make you happy.”

“It’s not your responsibility to make me happy. I doubt this is even possible.” Arya answered miserably. “At the Keep...At least I had Jeyne, Harwin and Pip to talk. I could visit the village and chat with the tenants. It was different, still too quiet in comparison to my own home, but at least I didn’t feel so suffocated and so lonely all the time.”

“I suppose that is something we have in common. Staying at the London house is suffocating and the silence there is not like the silence in the Keep.” He said sadly. “I walk the house and I keep wondering how it would feel to have you there to tell me about your memories of the place. Nothing there is friendly to me, but it’s your absence what really keeps me awake at night.”

“It seems that only now I realized that they are not coming back.” She said as Jon held her hand fondly.

“I can’t do anything about your family, but even if you don’t want me as your husband, at least allow me to be your friend.” Jon asked as he caressed her face. “What a friend could do to ease your heart now?”

What he could do indeed? Arya looked at his concerned face realizing how close they were. She could smell the whiskey in his breath as Jon cupped her cheek. It was painful to realize how much she have missed his company and the long hours they used to spend talking or playing the piano. Were his flaws so great that she could never find it in her heart to forgive him, or it was just her stubbornness and insecurity convincing her that she didn’t deserve any sort of happiness?

His face looked handsome for the very first time to her and every line of it was dear and familiar to her. His eyes always so gentle and his smile so shy. Perhaps the only thing he had to offer her was understanding since he was also a lonely soul.

It was Arya the one to close the distance between them and kiss his lips clumsily. Jon seemed a bit startled at her bold action, but soon he accepted what she was offering. He kissed her back with longing, need and joy. She would ignore the lies and her anger toward him. She would shut up her overactive imagination and all the fears they had brought to her life. Within Jon’s arms Arya didn’t feel lost or lonely.

“Come with me.” He said against her lips between a kiss and another. “Come home with me.”

What a tempting offer that was. What would happen if she accepted it and they went back to the chariot? Would he take her to the London House and claim her for good? Would she wake up in the morning in his bed with her reputation ruined and the worn out promise of a marriage? Sansa would hate her forever, but perhaps Arya wasn’t so different from Lyanna.

Jon kept begging her to come home with him as he kissed her neck and held her body against his. It was like that how Sansa found them. Like two obscene lovers about to throw caution through the window.

“What in the name of God is this?!” Sansa’s scandalized voice dragged them back to reality.

Jon let go of her immediately as he lowered his head like a child being scorned. He seemed to be utterly embarrassed while Arya tried to recompose herself.

“I think it’s about time for me to go.” Jon finally said without looking at Sansa.

“It would be for the best. This is not a house of ill repute and I won’t accept this indecency under my roof.” Sansa’s voice was harsh and adamant like their mother’s.

“I’m sorry about this.” Jon rose from the love-seat in a hurry to catch his scarf and top hat. “Goodnight, Lady Aryn...Lady Arya.” He bowed his head lightly before leaving the room like a storm.

Once Arya was alone with her sister, Sansa looked at her with a funny expression. Arya couldn’t say if her sister was actually mad or if it was triumph.

“I don’t know what happened here, but you better be ready to write to him tomorrow to inform Lord Stark of your acceptance to his proposal.” Sansa sounded resolute and all to pleased with herself.

“You won’t tell me what to do with my life.” Arya rose from her seat while drying the tears from her face. “If I decide to marry him it will be to settle my own needs and feelings, not to please you or protect my reputation.”

“Are you saying that you would rather play the role of a common harlot instead of securing a future for yourself?!” Sansa’s voice sounded exasperated and furious. “I don’t understand you, you ungrateful creature! I should send you back to him without a second thought to your will and forget that I ever had a sister!”

“Oh do it! That’s what you wanted from the start. You can only think about the title and keeping Winterfell in the family. If Jon offered to buy me for a reasonable price you would probably sell me without a second thought.” Arya replied furiously.

Sansa’s hand hit her face and left a burning feeling to her skin.

“The only thing I want is for you to overcome this stubbornness of yours before it’s too late.” Sansa said bitterly. “I know we never saw eye to eye and that you find a wicked satisfaction in doing the exact opposite of what you are told to do. At least once consider that I’m not your enemy and admit that the only thing standing between Lord Stark and you is your bloody willfulness.” Sansa took a deep breath while Arya looked at her feet in shame. “You are the only thing I have left from our former life. I know you must feel terribly lonely at this point. I felt the same for a while, but Harry and Cat prevented me of being consumed by grief. Don’t let it destroy you, Arya. I don’t want to lose the only sibling I have left.”

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Everyone has a personal way to deal with grief and it's not always a healthy one. Although the final scene might sound a bit extreme, keep in mind that Sansa and Arya are two sister with opposite mind sets dealing with loss in their own way and conflict is inevitable.  
> I hope you'll like this chapter and reviews are highly appreciated.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: NSFW

For days Arya could feel the shame and embarrassment caused by Jon’s kiss and Sansa’s slap. Although her sister’s words had hurt her greatly, Arya couldn’t say that Sansa was entirely wrong in her accusations.

There was a limit to Lady Aryn’s patience and Arya had crossed it in the careless way. At least Harry wasn’t home to expel her from the house for being indecorous and insubordinate. As for Jon, he hadn’t dared to send them invitations or even write to Arya  after being surprised by Sansa once more.

During those days Lady Aryn had been cold and harsh to her. Sansa avoided to direct a word to Arya as much as she could and had even forbidden her young sister of spending time with little Cat. To say that Arya felt miserable was an understatement.

Not even Ned Dayne had payed her another visit, which would serve to cheer her up a bit. There was no note or latter answering about the lawyer’s opinion on her father’s will. As the days passed, Arya realized that she had made her life fairly complicated.

She still could write to Jon and say that she would accept his proposal. That would make things so much easier. In a matter of weeks they could be at Winterfell, celebrating the new year and the new life ahead of them. She would have to feel lonely anymore and even Sansa would be happy about it.

Arya couldn’t stop thinking of what Jon had said. Was it really her anger and outrage preventing her of accepting his hand, or was it her stubbornness and rebel nature?

She had been the one to kiss him after all. Jon had been blameless in that until he decided to answer the kiss properly.  Did it mean that she was in love with him or it was just the sudden strike of grief and loneliness what led her to do that? Arya couldn’t tell for sure. The only thing she was certain of was that within his arms she felt peace.

It was nearly time for tea when Corbray knocked at the door of her room announcing that there was a letter for her. Arya opened the door and picked the envelope almost certain that it was from Jon, but to her surprise she found the name of Edric Dayne on it.

It was a relief to have news from him, even if she would prefer to talk to Ned personally about anything the lawyer had said. Arya opened the letter with trembling fingers.

 

“ _Dear Lady Arya,_

 

_I write to you hoping that you will excuse my lack of manners. I have been a poor friend to you and also a complete failure in which concerns the legal matters of your father’s will._

_My efforts proved to be useless for there is nothing illegal or invalid about the document. Therefore, your safety and economies will remain under Lord Stark’s care until you are married or until an emancipation, which_ _I doubt_ _to be an option to your tutor._

_I wish I could speak to you personally, but my presence is required at Starfall with urgency. When you receive this letter I will be gone already._

_If only things had been different, I could prove myself a better man and a better friend. Fortune hadn’t smiled at me in this, but I feel that I owe you my sincere apologies for the impertinence of my revelation on that day at the train station. It was stupid of me to mention those_ _half cooked plans I once had. I was naive and foolish to see love where there was only the most genuine friendship. It was even worst of me to reveal those things when you were already distressed over what I think to be an unfortunate misunderstanding._

_I also feel that I had interfered somehow in your perception of Lord Stark’s character and intentions, which was never my i_ _ntent._ _Jon is a good and honorable man. His actions regarding your tutelage and even his omissions about Lord Rhaegar’s condition can_ _be_ _understood as honest mistakes made in attempt of protecting you and your best interests._

_It is up to you to judge the man, but I would hate myself if my actions would lead to the separation of what would be otherwise a lovely couple._

_Once more I beg you to forgive me. If we ever see each other again, I hope I will find you_ _in good health and perfectly happy._

_Sincerely,_

_Edric Dayne”_

 

 

Arya read those words about a dozen times as if she couldn’t understand the meaning of that. She couldn’t believe it that Ned Dayne had abandoned her so carelessly, especially not after being so determinate to find her a way out of Jon’s tutelage. It was also strange how he took the time to defend Jon’s character to fiercely.

Those words were not honest ones. In fact she didn’t believe in a single line of that letter especially when she could almost smell Jon’s cologne in the paper. It was Lord Stark’s doing and yet another way of reminding her that he was still in control.

That would be her life if she chose to reject Jon for good? Would he drive away every suitor that dared to court her out of jealousy? That was absurd! That was outrageous!

Arya refuse to remain locked inside that room while her life was dictated by Jon like that. She would never accept it without a fight.  Just to remember that not long ago she had considered the possibility of being in love with him made her nauseous.

She grabbed her c ape and gloves before getting out of the room straightly to the hallway where Corbray detained her.

“May I ask where my lady is going?” The butler asked sourly.

“I need you to prepare the chariot to me.” Arya avoided his question, although she knew the man would never give up so easily.

“Lady Aryn is visiting Lady Lannister and took the chariot. I strongly advise you to stay in the house, my lady.” Corbray said.

“And I strongly advise you to not stand in my way, Mr. Corbray. I must see my tutor to deal with some financial nuisance. I’m sure my sister wouldn’t oppose since it is in her best interests to keep my expenses under control. She won’t be able to do so if I don’t go to Lord Stark to deal with him about this urgent matter, so fetch me a street car.”

“Very well. Don’t be late for dinner.” The man insisted.

“I won’t be.” Arya replied harshly before the butler could call for a street car.

She took a covered chariot pulled by a single horse to Kensington while she tried to think of everything she would say to Jon once she reached the house.

Once the chariot stopped in front of the familiar building, it was almost inevitable for her to not shed a tear. It all looked that same. She could almost see her mother waving at her from the window and it broke her heart to realize that once she entered through the door the house would be empty and silent like a church.

Arya knocked the door and soon it was open by a familiar face.

Mr. Luwin’s face seemed to bright up all of a sudden at the sight of her and Arya couldn’t help smiling at him fondly.

“My dear lady! We have missed you so much.” He said with affection as he took her cape. “I’ve been wondering when you would come back to the house. I can understand that you would rather stay with Lady Sansa, but still...It would be very unlike you to not visit at least once.”

“I should have come earlier, Mr. Luwin. I’ve missed you too.” She said with honesty. “Is Lord Stark at home?”

“In the library. I’ll have some tea sent to you in a few minutes. Should I prepare your room for the night, my lady?” Luwin asked diligently.

“It won’t be necessary, Mr. Luwin. I should go back to my sister’s house before dinner, but thank you for your kindness.”

“It’s not right, my lady. This house needs the presence of a lady and that should be you. Lord Stark is a good master to us, but we miss the comfort of your presence.”

“You are too kind.” She smiled at him sadly. “I must talk with Lord Stark now. There’s no need for you to lead the way or announce me.”

“As you wish, my lady.” Luwin agreed.

Arya went to the library as she used to do since she was a child.  The smell of the rugs, the faint scent of tobacco and even the sound of her steps against the floor...All of these were familiar and welcome to her. For a tinny moment Arya nearly forgot the purpose of her visit to the sake of her homesick heart.

She entered the library announced and without knocking.

Jon’s gaze wasn’t one of surprise. In fact he smiled at her as if he had been waiting for Arya to show up at any minute. He seemed pleased to see her there, obviously angered by yet another of his schemes.

“It’s a pleasure to finally welcome you home.” His voice was filled with relive and contentment, although Arya was sure that Jon had been setting a trap to lure her to the house. “Should I ask Luwin to bring us some tea?”

“It won’t be necessary. I won’t stay here for long.” She answered as she picked Ned’s letter from her pocket.

“To what do I own the pleasure of your visit then?” Jon asked calmly once Arya closed the door behind her.

“Will you explain me the meaning of this?” She handed him Dayne’s letter and Jon gave it a brief look.

“I think the meaning is quite obvious, but I must say that it was about time for Lord Dayne to go back to where he belongs.” Jon answered as a matter of fact. There was an annoying tone of cockiness in his voice that Arya couldn’t ignore.

“Did you have anything to do with Lord Dayne’s sudden departure and cold words?” Arya questioned him. “What have you done?”

“I may have interfered, but believe me that it was nothing illegal or violent.” Jon answered before opening the drawer of his study table to pick some documents.

“Explain yourself!” Arya demanded.

“That’s precisely what I’ll do before you reach the erroneous conclusion that my actions toward Dayne’s were guided by any sort of petty display of power over you.” Jon answered soberly before handing her a number of documents signed by both Dayne and Jon.

“What is this?” She questioned.

“My pardon to Dayne’s debts to me.” Jon’s voice was objective. “Before you think of me as a villain once more, let me say this. Lord Dayne have been facing some serious financial struggle for a while now. Before your father’s will had been reveled I had loaned him about ten thousand pounds. At the occasion Dayne granted me that his new business was sure to prosper but instead of investing it in a factory he lost nearly all the money in gambling.”

“So you are telling me that you pardoned his debts so he would get out of my life?” Arya accused him.

“Not exactly.” Jon argued. “What I’m saying is that Dayne had no means to pay me, or his other creditors. I’m sure he might have traveled North hoping to find in you a helpless heiress that he could sway to marriage, but found out that you had been put under my guardianship.” His voice was steady and calm. “He went to the Red Keep with the excuse of renegotiating his debt and ever since he has been cleverly suggesting that you should be careful of my intentions. I’m not saying that I haven’t wronged you, but I’m convinced that your reaction to my father’s condition and my omission wouldn’t be half as bad if Ned hadn’t said a thing about me.”

“You mean he was after my money.” Arya’s voice sounded disappointed, but not entirely surprised. That was a good reason for a gentleman like Lord Dayne to ever consider marrying her.

“If you married him than his debts would be paid with your share of the inheritance.” Jon confirmed. “What I did was to set a meeting with Dayne and consider his debts to me paid with the addition of another ten thousand pounds so he could pay his other creditors. You will find the receipt among the documents I handed to you. I’ve never threatened him, or demanded him to vanish from your life, although I expected he would do that much once he had no more reasons to pursue an advantageous marriage with some heiress.”

“I’ve known Ned Dayne since I was a child. I never had cause to doubt his character or to think of him as an opportunist. How could you be so sure that he had no other interest in me?” Arya wasn’t entirely convinced. At that Jon tried hard to conceal a discreet and short laugh.

“Let us say that Lord Dayne has peculiar preferences in which concerns his ideal partner. I’m sure that now that he is free from his creditors he will go back to his regular companions such as Loras Tyrell and Lord Renly Baratheon.”

A rya heard his words but had a hard time processing what Jon was implying with them. That is...She understood it perfectly well, but it was rather difficult to believe that Ned Dayne had that sort of preference.

“Oh...” She finally said once the words sank in. “I suppose this is a good reason for you to be so sure. May I ask you how could you possibly know such a thing?”

“As I said before, Ned and I were colleagues at Oxford and he had a bit of a reputation in the pubs there. About the gambling, I knew he was fond of it and we even played once or twice, but I never realized it was to him an addiction.” Jon said calmly. “I would like if we kept this matter between us. I have no business with Dayne’s life and I’m not interested in soiling his name.”

“Me neither.” Arya agreed. “So...This was not some sort of bitter revenge? Will you continue to maze all of my suitors in case I reject your proposal?”

“I would surely enjoy the sport, but no. Protecting your finances is my responsibility though. If anyone comes for your hand you can be sure that I will make inquiries and my own research to make sure it’s not another gold digger. I think it’s a reasonable thing for me to do.”

“You can’t possibly be so selfless.” Arya looked at him with suspicion. “I’m still waiting for you to be furious at me, or even reinforce the idea that I depend on you for my own survival.”

“I’m not a villain from a novel, sweet cousin. I’m not exactly the material of a hero either, but I would consider myself a decent minor character or an unlikely aid to the heroine.” He said with a hint of humor. “When I first proposed you I was determinate to make sure that your future would be safe even in my absence. I didn’t expect to fall for you in the way I did, but it would hurt my vanity if you came to me moved by anything but your wish.”

Jon looked directly at her with his gentle eyes and the shy smile she was so fond of. As he stood in the middle of the library Arya realized that his lean body and his sober face were to her a source of comfort and familiarity.

“You are young and I’m sure you will still break several hearts before deciding who will own your affections. I can only offer you security, my dull company and my devotion to you.” He said and there was such pain to those words that Arya could finally believe in his feelings. “I know I’m not as handsome as Dayne and there’s nothing much exciting about me. I can understand why you hesitate to accept my offer and I’m not a fool to believe that our last kiss was anything but your sudden fragility talking. If you are to refuse me, please do it now so I can try to move on with my life. Otherwise I’m likely to follow you like a ghost.”

Arya would have done as he said if only it was possible for her to admit that she felt nothing for him.  There was nothing else standing between them but Arya’s firm belief that he couldn’t possibly love someone as plain and untalented as her. Yet there he was. Naming himself dull and unattractive in comparison to another man.

They were mirror souls if such a thing existed.  She closed her eyes and examined her own soul. Where once there was doubt, now she could only find resolution.

Arya went to him with firm steps and unshakable  conviction . Jon simply looked at her with a hint of surprise once she touched his face.

“You won’t need to move on with your life.” She said with unusual serenity in her words. “I have accepted you once, perhaps for the wrong reasons. I’ll accept you again so this time there will be no mistakes.”

“Don’t tease me like that.” He begged as he held her face between his hands.

“I’m not teasing.” She said with conviction. “Take me home, Jon. Wherever it is, just take me home.”

J on kissed her with passion and joy unparalleled. Within his arms Arya felt accepted and adored for no  other reason but herself. Jon gave her shelter and called her family when she had none. He gave her a home when she felt lost and at that moment she could finally say that life without him had been a nightmare.

“I’ll have your belongings brought back here.” Jon say breathlessly once he parted the kiss. “I’ll have the Lady’s Room prepared for you. I’m not letting you go anywhere out of my sight until we’ve exchanged vows.”

“Sansa will never allow it. She will insist upon a traditional wedding and that means we should be apart until the wedding day.” Arya answered as she smiled at him.

“Is that what you want? A traditional wedding?” He asked with tenderness and Arya knew that he would make of their wedding day whatever she desired it to be.

“No.” She answered simply. “I want to make a mess out of it as I always do. As long as you are true to your promise, I really don’t care for a white dress or flowers.”

“Should we go to Winterfell immediately? Should I marry you secretly in chapel somewhere North and be done with it?” Jon suggested with enthusiasm.

“Let’s do it and arrive at Winterfell in time to celebrate our first Christmas as man and wife.”

 

xxxxxxxxxx

 

Lady Sansa tried to prevent Arya’s belonging to leave the house, but there was little that Lady Aryn could do once Jon was still Arya’s guardian. In a couple of hours Hodor arrived with all the luggage.

Mr. Luwin had professed his discontentment over the idea of Lady Arya taking the Lady’s Room for herself since there was only a door separating her room from Jon’s. As Lord Stark he refused to be lectured by a butler, even though Arya insisted that Luwin was nearly a family member  and his concern was understandable .

Once he announced to the staff that Lady Arya was to become the one and only Lady Stark a general sense of relief took the house. The ring in her hand proved his sincere intentions and now there was little reason for them to look at their Lord with distrust and suspicion.

Arya retired to her room soon after supper and that gave Jon the chance to take care of certain matters that should be addressed before their wedding.

First he wrote a note to the local newspapers informing of their engagement. It was only proper to make it public even if they had no intention of making the ceremony an eventful affair. Then he wrote to Mr. Poole to announce their imminent arrival.  Eventually he would write to Lady Sansa begging her forgiveness for the hasted  wedding, but he wasn’t taking any chances of Arya changing her mind again .

Sam would have to be informed once the wedding had been performed so he could take care of all the legal matters, but that was a thought for another time. His mind was a whirlwind of thoughts and there was so much to consider before everything was said and done.

He asked for the staff to prepare everything for their departure. They would live London at the first light and  reach Gretna Green by the end of the day. Then they would be wedded.

Jon tried hard to not think about his parents and how Rhaegar’s actions had been similar to those Jon was about to do. In his defense he could only say that not even once he had disrespected Arya in anyway and so far she had consented to everything he suggested. Neither was she carrying his child. He simply didn’t want to waste another chance for some reason.

Luck wasn’t friendly to his endeavors whenever Jon considered marriage. First Ygritte had turned him down once his father threatened to disinherit him. Years later he found another lady t hat conquer ed his affections and given to his poor choices and  misguided  actions Arya was lead to believe that he was some sort of villain aiming for her money.

Jon could still remember how it felt to enter her room and see it abandoned. A dress thrown to the floor, an unmade bed, his mother’s necklace abandoned on the dressing table and the desolation that followed.

He took her dress in his hands and cried over it like only an abandoned child could. He had gone from the high grounds of happiness to the usual loneliness, but at that point he was just too addicted to her presence.

It was like that how Sam found him. Tarly had gone to the Red Keep to inform him of an unusual event. Arya had been seen at King’s Landing in the company of no other but Edric Dayne.

At the time Dayne’s intentions had been crystal clear to Lord Stark, but Arya had no way to suspect of it. As far as she knew, Dayne was an old friend from noble stock and with money to his name. Jon knew better than to trust Lord Dayne with her security, especially when bankruptcy seemed inevitable. Jon feared the worst and although he would rather avoid bringing the police into the case he had no other choice.

At least Arya had gone straightly to her sister for aid and Jon was relieved to find her at Lady Aryn’s house. At the time he considered to take her back home, but  she seemed so scared and afraid that he simply couldn’t do it. Jon wasn’t a villain and he refused to play that role.

Arya never failed to remind him of his wrong doings from that day on. Yes, he had omitted things from her, but never with bad intentions. If he was to be honest, Arya never had much reason to trust him since the day he determinate that she should reside in the Red Keep. A few months of chats, dinners, and some dresses could hardly be used as proof of his character to a lady that was oblivious of his very existence until that moment.

Jon  had been determinate to marry his cousin once her mourning period was over. Her character and looks didn’t have much relevance to him, but Arya  proved to be a delightful surprise. Day by day he would wait for their moments together with anxiety. Their temperaments and passions were similar.  Her company kept loneliness at bay and soon Jon found himself smiling at her like fool. He had fallen in love with her, or better yet jumped into those feelings without a second thought.

More than once he wondered what he had to offer to Arya, who seemed to be a free spirit in every aspect. Jon’s pragmatism led him to believe that a safe life, her former home and the title that once belonged to her mother would be enough to male him a good option. Obviously he was wrong.

Once reason failed, poetry was required. Arya was made of verses taken from a tragic poem and he had been writing those since he was born. Now he was ready to try something more colorful and vibrant.

Jon wished for sleep to come to him swiftly, although that seemed to be unlikely. He poured himself some brandy and tried to relax a bit, knowing that the only thing standing between him and Arya was a closed door.

That thought was powerful and highly inappropriate. There would be time for intimacy in the near future and perhaps Arya would need some time to feel comfortable with the idea. If only kissing her wasn’t such a devastating experience…

The sound of the door opening brought him back to reality. Jon presumed it was Mr. Luwin to ask if he needed anything else before the old man could call it a night. Once Jon turned to face the door reality proved to be way sweeter.

Arya had crossed the door between their rooms. She stood there with her bare feet,  long hair falling over her back , night gown and a shawl around her shoulders. At first he was startled by her presence and then he considered that she might have changed her mind again.

“I couldn’t sleep.” She said simply.

“Me neither.” Jon answered calmly. “Is it the room what bothers you?”

“I guess.” Arya agreed, but her voice didn’t sound so sure. “It was my mother’s room after all. It feels like I’m trespassing, but that’s not all.”

“What else is troubling you, my dear?” He asked fondly before walking toward her. Deep inside his heart Jon feared that she would tell him to postpone the wedding.

“I never asked you to forgive me for everything I did and all the troubles I caused.” Arya said simply as she shrank her shoulders lightly. “I was so stubborn and you didn’t deserve my distrust, at least not in such proportion. I don’t want to start a life with you without putting it behind us and making emends.”

Jon held both her hands and kissed them with devotion. His heart finally at peace.

“There’s nothing for me to forgive.” He assured her. “I couldn’t expect you to trust me when we barely knew each other. That and my stupid actions were responsible for all that followed.”

“You are too kind to say such a thing. I know I have my share of blame in this.” Her left hand touched his face and that sent a shiver thru his spine. Was she aware of how much he wanted to kiss her lips and take her to bed regardless to decency or reputations.

“If it makes you feel better, we have the rest of our lives for you to compensate me.” Jon smirked at her before cupping her cheek lightly.

“I shall do my best.” She smiled shyly and that was very unlike her. “Would you ever leave me, Jon?”

“After everything we went through? Never.” He wondered why she would feel suddenly afraid of him leaving her, when Jon was the one terrified of her changing her mind about him.

“Then I have something to ask of you.” She said and there was a blush to her cheeks.

“Anything.” He said even though he was fully aware that he was entering a dangerous territory.

“I want to be your woman tonight.” Arya said with a trembling voice and for second Jon couldn’t believe what he had just heard. “I don’t want to wait. I don’t want it to be a part of a transaction or a formality. Allow me this one last act of rebellion so I can be sure that I’m doing it out of love, and not because it’s the right thing to do.”

“I should say no.” He answered while trying to keep his emotions under control. “It will be only a couple of days until we are married...Are you sure that’s what you want?”

“Don’t make me beg.” She replied while looking at him with sly eyes.

Jon didn’t wait for another word to kiss her with fierce desire. Arya’s arms embraced him immediately so he could feel her delicate body pressed against his. She answered the kiss without reservation.

He must have been dreaming of that conversation and that kiss all along. He would wake up from a drunken dream any time, but not just yet. Not until he could give her the love and the passion that Arya deserved.

Arya was bold in her gestures. Her fingers  undoing the buttons of his shirt so she could touch Jon’s bare skin and live her fiery mark all over it. Her shawl fell while Jon conducted her to his bed blindly. His lips were never far from hers and his hands took the task of mapping every inch of her exposed skin.

As Jon laid his bride on her back he seized the moment to look at her flushed face so he would remember that for the years to come. The front of her night gown half open, exposing her small breasts, her face flushed, her eyes dark with desire. He kissed her neck and heard her gasping for air. His hands got rid of what remained of her clothes.

Something could be said about Jon. He was patient man whenever dealing with people and it was no different with his bride. He would take his time to savor the moment and allow Arya to enjoy it as much as him.

His kisses went down her neck all the way to her breasts as his hands slide down her curves. He kissed her belly and felt Arya’s fingers entwined in his hair as she made sounds of approval. Once he spread her leg to access her intimate parts, Arya looked at him with shock. Jon replied her insecurity with a sly smirk before tasting her in such an obscene way.

Arya grabbed the sheets with her hands as he played with her. A few licks and kisses and her voice became louder as her legs tightened around his head. Those sweet sounds were like music and he was a passionate fan of such an art.

All those forbidden books form the East hidden in his father’s library, roughly translated to practice guided by a collection of colorful images. He had been fascinated with those pictures and even more with the secrets they could tell. Indians believed that pleasure was meant to go both ways and Jon was inclined to agree with them. He wanted Arya not only to enjoy the act, but also crave for him as much as he craved for her.

Once he stopped her body was languid and covered in sweat as she tried to breath with difficulty. Jon allowed her to recover while he got rid from his trousers and undergarments before getting back to her arms.

Jon placed one of her legs above his hip so he could get a better angle. He tried to be gentle as he entered her. Arya was tight and slippery. Naturally there was a bit of resistance from her body as she adjusted to his. She bit his shoulder once was completely buried within her.

Once more they kissed and Jon felt her relaxing under his body. His hips started to move carefully, guided by the sounds she made whenever she approved the feeling.

There were plenty of kisses and caresses among moans and laughs. Positions were changed and her was mesmerized by her wicked curiosity. Arya was indeed a free spirit and he loved her for that.

He couldn’t say how long their passion plays lasted, but at least he was proud of making Arya call his name several times along the night before he reached his pleasure.

Arya rested within his arms and he looked at her dazzled. He couldn’t remember how it felt to be without her anymore. Those gloomy feelings had no place in his mind or heart any longer. As long as they were together, only happiness would prevail.

“It will always be like this?” She asked with a hint of wonderment in her voice. Jon smiled at her.

“How so?” He asked in a cocky tone.

“Like nothing else existed but us and the feeling of complete emptiness and fulfillment all at once.” She said and perhaps she should written a poem with those lines.

“I’ll assume that you enjoyed yourself.” He smirked proudly. “I’ll do my best to deliver such a bliss to you every time.”

“Now you can make an honest woman out of me.” She said wickedly and both of them laughed at it.

“I wanted our wedding night to be special, but I’m glad we anticipated it.” He confessed. “Are you sure now? Is it love what you feel, or you will have me because it’s the right thing?”

“I guess it’s both.”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...This was a very dynamic chapter XD.  
> I hope the development of Arya's feelings sound organic. In many ways Dayne's letter is more of an excuse for her to go after Jon for the first time and not the other way around.  
> As for the final part, if Queen Victoria could read it I would be banned from social life for good. I took some liberties with the traditional victorian narrative and turned this into a great excuse for a sex scene. I also wanted to show Jon's side of the events.  
> Thank you all for the reviews. I hope you'll like this chapter. Reviews are highly appreciated.


	14. Chapter 14

He  woke up early in the morning with his head spinning and the unsettling sensation left by the most vivid dream. Jon rubbed his eyes a bit before turning to his side to face reality. For a second he couldn’t believe in his sight, but it was true. That night have happened and Arya was still sleeping by his side with her body covered by a thick blanket.

Jon  dressed his trousers and rang the bell announcing to the staff that he was awaken and waiting for his breakfast before they could leave to the train station.  Soon a maid or even Mr. Luwin would be there and Lord Stark would rather spare Arya of the disapproving gazes. He kissed her cheek lightly and rubbed her arm so she would wake up.

Arya opened her eyes lazily and it seemed that she had been startled by the fact that the night had been real. She pulled the blanked to cover everything from her neck down and Jon couldn’t help a soft laugh.

“Good morning, love.” He said in awe. That was a sight he could easily get used to. “I called for breakfast and I thought you might want to go back to your room before anyone can see you here.”

“Not that it will change things. As soon as a maid comes to make the bed she will know for sure what happened.” Arya answered with her cheeks flushed. “Either way there will be gossip.”

“So we better run to Gretna Green as soon as possible so I can remedy this.” Jon concluded with a shy, but pleased smile. “Should I call for a maid to help to get dressed?”

“Breakfast first. Would you catch my nightgown and shawl please?” Arya asked with evident embarrassment that he thought to be rather pointless but charming.

Jon picked her clothes and Arya got dressed under the covers for the sake of her modesty. He hoped that once the ceremony had been performed she wouldn’t feel the need of hiding her body after a night spent in his arms.

It had been Mr. Luwin to enter the room bringing their breakfast and for a second Jon honestly believed that if the man had a gun he would have shoot his master on spot for dishonoring Lady Arya.

His bride avoided the man’s gaze while Jon looked at the old butler with cold eyes in a silent warning.

“Not even a word, Luwin.” Jon said sharply as he faced the man with the shocked face. “Save your opinions to yourself.”

“This is not right!” The old man argued.

“If your concern is directed to Lady Arya’s good name and reputation, you are more than welcome to accompany us North so you can be our witness. I won’t spend another day without being legally bind to your mistress and if I fail my word you can shot me dead.” Jon’s voice was harsh and incisive.

“Very well, My Lord. I shall sever both of you in your journey to Winterfell. Lady Sansa and the household would be pleased to have someone trustworthy at the ceremony.” Luwin agreed as he tried to not look at Arya.

“Lady Arya will need help to get dress and so will I.” Jon said as he took the platter form the man’s hands. “I’ll ring once we’ve finished.”

Once Luwin was gone it was impossible for them to not laugh  like two naughty children as they shared breakfast for the first time.

In a couple of hours they were already on their way to the train station in the company of Mr. Luwin and a maid named Osha. It was impossible not to noticed that it got colder over the night and they would probably have some snow along the journey. Jon hoped that would n’t delay his plans, but Arya seemed unconcerned.

“I hope your clothes are warm enough.” She said with a teasing smile once they entered their cabin at the first class wagon.

Arya sat by his side and Jon held her gently. Once the train left the station it didn’t take long for Arya to fall asleep with her head resting against his shoulder. The gentle sway of the wagon was a silent invitation for a nap, but he was still too anxious to consider it.

Jon could barely believe that just a day before he had been sure of Arya’s refusal and his misery. Now it felt like nothing could keep them apart. His pessimist nature would inevitably warn him that he should be cautious and not get expectations too high, but the truth was that Jon wanted to scream for the whole world to listen that he was the happiest man alive.

Even Luwin’s stubbornness faded once the butler found his Lady sleeping against Jon’s shoulder and how the young master doted on h is bride. The old man  entered the cabin and sat in front of Jon.

“I can’t help worrying about her.” Luwin confessed. “After all the tragedy this family already suffered, I can’t bare the thought of this child being harmed in any way.”

“Is it so difficult to believe that I wish for nothing but her happiness?” Jon questioned him without hard feelings or reproach. He was honestly interested in the man’s opinion about his character.

“For everything I’ve seen of Your Lordship, I don’t think you are a bad or even immoral sort of man, despite of last night’s indiscretions. I knew your Lady mother though. You can’t expect me to believe that this isn’t history repeating itself.” Luwin replied with a heart broken voice as his eyes looked at Arya with fear and kindness. “She is like a granddaughter to me. I’ve seen her first steps and her first words. I can’t really prevent you of living your love as you see fit. I can only hope that you will be as honorable as I think you are and that you will take good care of our Lady.”

“I’ve always judged my father harshly since I learned about what happened between him and my mother.” Jon said in a rather sad tone. “I had a plan. I would marry Arya in a Spring day and then take her back to Winterfell so her future would be secured. I thought the whole situation of the guardianship and the inheritance rather unfair with her, especially when she could probably run the state on her own much better than I could ever hope to do. That would allow me to keep my duties to my father’s land and health while grating her a certain freedom. I tried to be reasonable and honorable as my father hasn’t been so I could be seen as worthy of your Lady’s hand. I never expected to fall for her as I did and once she accepted my second proposal...I threw caution, reason and honor away for the sake of a moment of sheer selfish happiness. I doubt you will ever fully accept me as your master as much as I doubt that Winterfell will accept me. I can understand the sentiment once you have no reason to trust me so far. What I can do is to care for your Lady and love her with all my heart as I count myself as a lucky bastard for the privilege of having her for my life companion.”

“If Your Lordship manage to fulfill this promise, than you’ll have my gratitude and loyalty for as long as I live.” Luwin said with eyes full of tears. “You’ll never know boredom with Lady Arya by your side. She have always been a funny little thing and one can hardly hope to find a heart as gentle as hers.”

“With that much I agree.”

It was late in the night once they arrived at Gretna Green and they agreed it would be for the best to find a place to rest. They found lodging in a small and cozy inn. To avoid yet another disagreement with Luwin, Jon and Arya slept in separate rooms.

In the morning  they went to church  and  Mr. Luwin accepted with great joy the honor of giving Lady Arya in marriage.

There were no flowers, guests, or even a proper wedding dress. Arya wore a winter dress and a cape to keep her warm, but Jon could say that there was never a bride as beautiful as her. There was no time for elaborate vows, sermon or songs. It was a rather objective and pragmatic ceremony meant to fulfill the legal formalities, but the most important  thing was that Arya accepted him as her lawful husband and that was all he cared about.

They took the train to Wintertown shortly after the ceremony. There was no point in delaying their arrival once everything had been said and done. The only extravagance of the day was a bottle of champagne taken from the restaurant wagon.

After several glasses, Jon found himself singing to popular songs as he hasn’t done in ages. Arya clapped her hands while Luwin and Osha laughed at the scene. The servants would probably spread the word that their new lord was an utter fool for his little wife  but he didn’t care about that .

There was a carriage with the Stark coat of arms on its door waiting for them at the train station and Jon realized that snow had started to fall while they were on the road to Winterfell. It would be a white Christmas for them and the perspective of such a peaceful event filled him with joy and expectation.

H is eyes set on the old castle to admire the mighty construction with wonderment. That was his new home, a prelude to a new life in which loneliness and madness weren’t his constant companions. Jon could barely contain his excitement and anxiety. In many ways he felt like a child looking at a brand new toy for the first time.

That had been his mother’s home and a great part of her identity that Jon knew so little about. Even if he was a stranger to all intends and purposes, he also felt connected to the land in a mysterious way.

Arya was probably as excited as he was for going back to her childhood’s home and a place that was familiar and dear to her heart. He had been indeed cruel to her for demanding her presence in the Red Keep when his cousin had just lost her family, but now that he considered the latest events he couldn’t bring himself to feel sorry about it.

The staff was waiting form them outside the castle. All of them standing in line to greet Lady Arya for her return and to meet the new Lord Stark for the first time.  For some reason he had forgotten to inform Mr. Pool and Mr. Cassel of his wedding and all the staff was a bit shocked to see their new master kissing  their former master’s daughter once the y crossed the door. It was certainly a scandal of considerable proportions until Jon announced that Arya was the new Lady Stark of Winterfell  by marriage.

He couldn’t tell if they were pleased with the announcement  _per se,_ but they all seemed happy about having the confirmation that Lady Arya would be the mistress of the house.

It was quite obvious that Arya was dear to them and her smile as she greeted every one of the staff’s members was dazzling. Even in the Red Keep it had been clear that Arya had a talent for making friends regardless to their names or ranks. That was probably one of the qualities he cherished the most in his wife.

Obviously that being back to her home brought Arya some painful memories and tears were somehow inevitable. At least Jon would make sure that she would have to deal with them alone. He held her hand and gave it a gentle squeeze in a sign of reassurance and Arya looked at him with gratitude in her eyes.

There would be time to create new and happy memories there. Maybe in a couple of years they would even have some children’s laugh to fill those halls with joyous noise. He didn’t want to hurry. Those things would happen in due time and meanwhile he would enjoy the privilege of Arya’s affections.

On their first night Arya came to his room once more and Jon received her with open arms and avid kisses. She seemed to enjoy his touch and his caresses as he removed her nightgown to expose her warm skin.

Jon liked how her hands weren’t afraid of explore his body or demonstrate appreciation. Her breathless voice was a sign that he was doing something right or so he supposed. That night she seemed more relaxed and comfortable in his presence.

When he entered her, Arya held to him and kissed his lips fervently. There was no resistance and no pain to taint the moment, only the overwhelming sensation of being surrounded by her in every single aspect.

Her legs around his waist, her arms around his chest, her scent all over his body and the magnificent image of her blushing face as pleasure approached. Arya called his name in her frenzy in a breathless tone.  Jon tried to prolong her pleasure as much as possible while fighting his own need for relief. He closed his eyes and allowed pleasure to come in violent waves as his seed filled her.

Once Jon recovered full control over his senses, he held her in his arms. It was cold outside the castle and having someone to keep him warm during the night was something he enjoyed enormously.

“Is it always so cold here?” Jon asked lazily. Arya laughed lightly in answer.

“It can be worst, but the castle is quite cozy.” She said. “Why? Are you afraid of a bit of snow?”

“Not really. I’m just thinking that if I’m going to be constantly freezing it would be for the best to secure your company over the nights so neither of us will get a cold.” At that Arya laughed even harder.

“Is this your way of telling me that we shouldn’t keep separate rooms?” She asked before turning to look at him.

“Maybe.” Jon smirked. “Is this a bad idea?”

“Not at all.” She kissed his lips lightly. “I think I would enjoy it very much.”

“What else would you enjoy, Lady Stark?” He asked with a tender tone as he moved a strand of hair away from her eyes.

“I can’t think of anything now. It has been a while since I’ve felt such happiness.” Arya confessed.

“I’m pleased to hear that.”

“What would make you happy?” Arya asked in return. “This has always been my home, but it’s an alien place to you. What would it take for you to feel at home?”

“I don’t know.” He answered vaguely. “Maybe only time can do it. I would like to taste those torts you’ve mentioned though. I’m quite fond of sweets.” Arya laughed again.

“Here I thought you would say children.” She confessed. “I’m not sure if I’m ready for it, but if it would make you happy then we could try.”

“Is this troubling you? That I would demand children from you?” Jon asked curiously.

“Isn’t it the purpose of marriage? I guess every husband expects it from his wife. I know that Harry did and Sansa was rather distressed. It took a couple of years for her to conceive andI’m not sure if he was happy about her giving birth to a baby girl.” Arya confessed.

“I don’t think we should worry about these things now. We’ve been married for less than twenty four hours after all.” Jon smiled at her. “Of course I would love it to have children with you, but it will happen when it has to happen. You don’t have to me worried about it and I will be delighted to have a baby girl as much as I will be delighted to have a boy.”

“I think soon you’ll be as chubby as Sam because of all the torts I’ll give you for saying that.”Arya answered with relief in her voice as she hugged him tightly.

“Would children make you happy though?” Jon asked in a concerned tone.

“I guess so, but...Right now I think the idea to be a bit frightening.” Arya confessed and Jon could understand her fear. His own mother had died in childbirth after all.

“Let us worry about it in the future then. I’m not in a hurry to be a father just yet and I would like to monopolize your attention a while longer.”

 

§§§§§§§

 

 

Eddard was born on  New Year’s Eve two years after his parents wedding. Lord Stark had been both thrilled and terrified once Lady Arya excused herself from the dinner table just to enter in labor an hour later.

The whole castle seemed to be as anxious as he was for the hours that followed. A doctor had been summoned to assist Lady Stark, but nothing would ever make Jon feel at ease until someone told him that both mother and child were fine.

The doctor said that had been an incredibly swift labor although Jon felt like it had lasted for hours and hours. In the end Arya had been incredibly brave and their first born was everything a new born should be: tinny, loud, healthy and adorable.

Eddard’s birth seemed to give Arya some peace of mind, even if Jon had assured her several times that he didn’t care about the child’s sex. He could understand that she felt pressure by the idea that he needed an heir, but Jon had been certain that other children would follow. Perhaps Arya’s anxiety was due to the fact that Lady Aryn had given birth to a boy six month previous to Ned’s birth.

Lyarra was born three years later  shortly after Lord Rhaegar’s death .  The baby girl seemed to be born to bright up Jon’s life after his father’s passing, even if they had never been close or particularly affectionate toward each other.

Lady Arya had been worried that the arrival of another child at such time wouldn’t be entirely welcome, since Jon seemed to have surrendered to long weeks of utter melancholy. That wasn’t the case though. Lyarra was like a beacon of light to him and nothing would ever make Lord Stark melt like his daughter’s laugh.

Slowly both the Red Keep and Winterfell were filled with laughs that seemed capable of dissipate the shadows of both places. At that point neither Jon nor Arya could remember how it felt to be lonely for they knew that they would always have a home within each other’s arms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THE END!  
> I hope you guys have enjoyed the ride until this point. I'm sorry about my delay in completing it, but I hope the result have been worth waiting for.  
> I know this story is rather naive and character are highly idealized, but I tried to follow the aesthetic of Regency/Victorian novels, especially those with a gothic theme.  
> I'm happy with the result and I hope you'll be happy too.  
> Reviews are highly appreciated as usual and see you guys in another story.

**Author's Note:**

> I started to write this one a while ago, when Meli asked me to write something inspired on Crimson Peak. Although I love the idea of the Sharps' romance, I had a hard time picturing Jon in Thomas' place. This story is far closer to Jane Eyre, if I had to pic a gothic novel to compare it with. I love the idea of this two in a dark castle full of mysteries and family secrets.  
> I hope you'll like it and reviews are highly appreciated.


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